O/T - A read for parents
Show this one to the kids..... A young man went to seek an important position at a large Landscaping company. He passed the initial interview and was going to meet the director for the final interview. The director saw his resume, it was excellent. And asked,'
"Have you received a scholarship for school?" The boy replied, "No".
'It was your father who paid for your studies? '' Yes.' He replied.
'Where does your father work? ' 'My father is a Farmer' and landscapes for fun.
The Director asked the young man to show him his hands.
The young man showed a pair of hands soft and perfect.
'Have you ever helped your parents at their job? '
'Never, my parents always wanted me to study and read more books. Besides, he can do the job better than me.
The director said:
'I have got a request: When you go home today, go and wash the hands of your father and then come see me tomorrow morning.'
The young man felt his chance to get the job was high.
When he returned to his house he asked his father if he would allow him to wash his hands.
His father felt strange, happy, but with mixed feelings and showed his hands to his son. The young man washed his hands, little by little. It was the first time that he noticed his father's hands were wrinkled and they had so many scars. Some bruises were so painful that his skin shuddered when he touched them.
This was the first time that the young man recognized what it meant for this pair of hands to work every day to be able to pay for his studies. The bruises on the hands were the price that his father payed for his education, his school activities and his future.
After cleaning his father's hands the young man stood in silence and began to tidy and clean up the workshop. That night, father and son talked for a long time.
The next morning, the young man went to the office of the director.
The Director noticed the tears in the eyes of the young man when He asked him,
'Can you tell me what you did and what you learned yesterday at your house?'
The boy replied: 'I washed my father's hands and when I finished I stayed and cleaned his workshop.'
'Now I know what it is to appreciate and recognize that without my parents, I would not be who I am today. By helping my father I now realize how difficult and hard it is to do something on my own. I have come to appreciate the importance and the value in helping my family.
The director said, "This is what I look for in my people. I want to hire someone who can appreciate the help of others, a person who knows the hardship others go through to accomplish things, and a person who realizes that money is not his only goal in life".
'You are hired'.
A child that has been coddled, protected and given everything he or she wants, develops a mentality of "I have the right" and will always put himself or herself first, ignoring the efforts of parents, family and friends. If we are this type of protective parent are we really showing love or are we helping to destroy our children?
You can give your child their own room in a big house, good food, a computer, tablet, cell phone, and a big screen TV, but when you're washing the floor or painting a wall, children need to experience that too.
After eating, have them wash the dishes with their brothers and sisters, let them fold laundry or cook with you, pull weeds or mow the lawn. You are not doing this because you are poor and can't afford help. You are doing this because you love them and want them to understand certain things about life.
Children need to learn to appreciate the amount of effort it takes to do a job right. They need to experience the difficulties in life that people must overcome to be successful and they must learn about failure to be able to succeed.
Children must also learn how to work and play with others and that they will not always win, but they can always work harder to reach their goals. If they've done their best, then they can take pride in all the effort they put forth.
- Rags's blog
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Comments
Kids who have had everything
Kids who have had everything handed to them (either by their parents or in Little Idiot's SD23's case, by the government) never learn the value of money, work ethic, or how to be grateful. My SD will have had six years of college paid for by the taxpayers (not just the 4 years required for a degree, but also an extra 2 years also just for f-ing around) plus extra money for living expenses... all free to her courtesy of hardworking Americans. The government has given her free everything her whole life because of her mother and she just wasted it. She ruins it for other poor, hardworking kids who need it and would use it as a stepping stone to climb out of poverty (you know by working hard and getting good grades and graduating with a degree). I can't wait for the gravy train to finally stop. Maybe then she will be forced to grow up.
Where is Little Idiot by the way? She withdrew from yet another class (Gen Chem 2) last spring and is retaking it. This class by the way is only the second class in her program schedule... it's Freshman year class. Yeah, by credit hours, she is supposed to be graduating this semester but God forbid we (DH I mean) actually ask her wtf she's doing (might hurt her feelings).
My DW had some Gov't benefits from her deceased BioDad.
Not much. But some. Her BioDad/MIL's first DH, was killed a few days before my MIL found out she was pregnant with DW. DW's BioDad was in the military and they were living in Europe when he was killed in an accident. DW was a Uni honor student for both her undergrad and grad studies. As a single teen mom Uni student she also go subsidized day care for SS (She paid $1 per day), and she got WIC. No cash. She worked 3 part time jobs while being a mom and a full time student.
My SIL (DW's youngest sib) is a POS who lived on school loans, took up a seat in Uni classes for far more than 4 years, and is now crying for the tax payers to bail her out with Student Loan forgiveness from Grampa Sugar Joe and his merry band of lets scalp the tax payers for POS morons who knew they were borrowing and what they were borrowing for.
SIL never completed a degree at any level. She gets all cranky when it is pointed out to her that her Resume presents as if she has a Bachelor's degree and for sure when I bare her ass when she lies about it in my presence.
Grrrrrr.
Before a single Cent of education loans are forgiven for uncompleted degrees, anyone and everyone who completed school, paid for it themselves, or paid off their loans should get a full refund of all education related expenses. Responsible people should not be burdened by the lazy and stupid entitlement morons.
IMHO of course.
As for LI's accumulated college hours.... I transferred schools and changed majors so much during my 11yr undergrad career (In class every semester for 11 years. Though not always full time) that when I graduated with my BS I had over 240 semester hours of credit. My issue was I loved school and changed my major when I took an elective that grabbed my interest. I was only 20 semester hours from a BA in Econ when I did my final change of majors to Engineering. That set me back 3 more years.
When the semester hours for my Masters are added, I have nearly 300hrs.
If LI actually ever graduates, with any major, I hope that it is with a marketable degree. Not all of them are marketable for a lucritive role in the job market.
We had breakfast yesterday with a long time friend whose youngest started in a Computer Science major and ended up with a interdisciplinary studies Bachelors with a combination of Criminal Justice, Studies, and some other non marketable component taht I do not recall. As our friend descriibes his youngest's degree, it is in nothing. They award it for completing the ~120 hours that most Bachelors degrees require with no requirment to actually complete a major. His youngest is doing basically a data entry job making just enough to not starve or be homeless.
The kid did take out loans that he can't pay.
I am a huge proponant of going to college. I am also a strong proponant of training in the skilled trades. I did a major paper in grad school on maximizing career long income by working a hybrid trades and University studies progression. Enter a trade development program/apprenticeship while working full time and taking evening classes for a degree. Over the first 3 years earning in the $200k range while completing Apprentice, Craftsman, and Master/Journeyman Craft/Trade cards. Continue to work as a Journeyman/Mastercraftsperson while completing a Bachelors part time and while earning $70K+ a year. Once a Bachelor's is completed, look at transitioning into managerial roles.
This model earns well over an additional $1Mil in income over the course of a 50 year career by maximizing early income that non working college students forego and can never recover. Then the degreed tradesperson gaines on both ends. Early high income followed by the much higher managerial incomes the last couple of decades of work. Transitionong from hourly income to salaried income is the maximizing success factor for optimizing career long income. Industry, profession, etc... not withstanding.
I did not follow this model. Though I have recommended it to hundreds of trades employees over my career directing skilled trades organizations. Every few years I get a graduation announcement from a former employee and even get the occassional announcement for someone currently working for me when they graduate.
My FIL was much like your DH as far as avoiding the topic with
the person he should have spoken with about not making progress towards degree completion while being in college forever. FIL used to get aggrivated with my DW on why SIL never seemed to make progress while spending a shit ton on school.
FIL and even SIL's DH for some reason took the stance that SIL's idiocy was somehow my DW's responsibility.
They would not talk to SIL about it. I think the reason was three fold. 1. The whole family buries their head in the sand and avoids direct conversation. 2. Not wanting to deal with SIL's hurt fee fee tears, etc... 3. They did not understand that the forced passing and graduation from HS wiithout actually meeting the requirements is not how it works in University. Which is a bit surprising since my FIL had an AS degree.
I'm NOT a parent and I get
I'm NOT a parent and I get that, totally.
Unfortunately many birth parents cover their eyes and put their head in the sand about kids and getting them involved in household tasks. Then they wonder why the kids have no respect for anyone and are entitled.