Should I ask him not to take the promoton?
Dh just told me that he got the promotion that he applied for at work. That's great, right? Well, not really...
First issue is daycare. He currently is part of a daycare subsidy program for the skids. The program covers the majority of the skids daycare costs. He has to tell them about his raise, and I fear that they may kick him out of the program for making too much. Not sure what the limits are, but if he does get kicked off daycare for them goes from ten dollars a week each to 80 a week each.
My other, more selfish, reason is his new schedule. He currently gets home at 8pm and has Sat and Sun off and a half day on Friday. So I have all the kids, his and ours, after school til bedtime by myself. He gets home right after the kids go to bed and we have two hours together before we go to bed.
His new schedule has him working 3-1130, so be won't be home til midnight. And his days off will be Sunday and Monday. This puts even more responsibilty on my shoulders. Not only am I still having to deal with all the kids by myself all week.... Now he will be gone half of Saturday too. And I won't see him al eek other than saying bye as I take all the kids to school in the morning.
So hed get all morning all week long to relax on his own and do whatever he wants, and my free time is nonexistant. We've had worse schedules (working both sat and sun) but I just don't want to do this.
Also, Friday mornings used to be my "me" time. I don t work Fridays (work 4 ten hours days) so I take Fridays to relax or get things done uninterupted, or to spend so.e quality time with just my bs3 (ill keep him home from Jr preschool sometimes). And now that will no longer be the case. Dh will be home with me until exactly when the kids get out of school. I know he didnt plan it that way, but damn.
So should I tell him not to take the promotion? Or just suck it up and keep my mouth shut?
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Yes, we have full
Yes, we have full custody.
His shift changes every six month whether he takes the promotion or not. Next shift bid is in Dec..... So it might get better or it.could get worse.
I would tell him how you feel
I would tell him how you feel about it and that the new hours puts you in a undesirable position regarding caring for all the kids. I'd also see if the "raise" outweighs the extra cost of care. I don't think anyone should ever stay quiet about something that clearly affects them.
The current schedule sux, but
The current schedule sux, but this one sux even more.
First, I would find out for
First, I would find out for sure about the daycare.
Second, how does your husband feel about all of this? You should definitely discuss these things with him.
Third, would it affect him negatively at work if he turns down the promotion?
Dh is going to look I to the
Dh is going to look I to the daycare situation.
He understands my position, but only to a point. He said he explained the situation to his soon-to-be boss, and that she gave him one weekend day off. But he only has so much understanding before the "you hate my kids" crap starts and he gets defensive over his kids. So I am always hesitant to bring stuff up, and I really only open my mouth if there's a good alternative.
He won't take kindly to me saying that I want my Fridays without him... So that's not going to be mentioned.
And either way, I have.the.kids all week by myself. So Saturday 2 pm to bedtime is really the only "change" in regards to the skids.
He works in a call center, so I don't know how much turning it down would be detrimental to his career. I am sure it would be frowned apon, but its not a career killer....I think.
No help from the bms. Bm1
No help from the bms. Bm1 lost SS when dcf pulled him, and she doesn't take her eowe visitation. Bm2 walked out years ago and left the state.
It just sucks that whenever a change has to e made.... It s always better for him and worse for me. He never end up with the lions share of the work, its always add a bit more to peanuts plate.
The child care subsidy is
The child care subsidy is non-taxable income, correct? Explain to your DH that if he takes the promotion he could lose the child care subsidy and increase his taxable income. You would need to work the math, but a new promotion alone might bump you guys up to the next tax bracket (much higher taxes and no child care subsidy)...
Sounds like a pretty clear,
Sounds like a pretty clear, "NO!" to me.