Just Needing To "Vent/UPDATE
So, my SS decides he is going to threaten my husband (in anger) and says (with his fist in my husbands face) "OoooH I want to fight you so bad! Needless to say, they get into a physical fight. I thought my husband was really going to hurt the boy. Nonetheless, now I have two wholes in my wall put there by my SS! I told him that he has to work to pay for repairing the wholes. Then I find out he doesn't have a job, so I was thinking a whole day or chores or community service, but he is 16. My husband, once again, has no solid imput how to handle the situation, but he is ready and willing to buy the boy a video MP3 player for his birthday! Uuugh!
So, this is the second outburst where my SS has attempted or destroyed some part of our property. I want him gone. My husband just said if he does not change he won't stay with us after he graduates. But, I also think the child need counseling. He send over $700 a month in childsupport and the kids insurance somehow covers counseling, so the his Ex wife says. But, she will not take him to counseling. She just laughs at the fact that not to long ago my SS put a big hole in her wall!
I do not feel safe with him in my home. Especially with a nine month old.
Am I over reaching? Are there any inexpensive ways to get this child some help?
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There are counselors in the
There are counselors in the world that will councel for free. Here there is one that also runs the women's crisis center and the food bank/clothes closet. He works for a private non-profit. I would look for one of those guys first, but they don't really advertise.
Also, there are the state facilities. Here it's called MHMR which stands for mental health and mental retardation. They do counseling, but ... it's not the best. Many psychologist will work on a sliding scale. Also, universities usually have some kind of counseling available from those in the master's programs. Get the kid arrested for assault and he'll more than likely have some counseling built into his juvenile probation. Talk to his school counselor, they should be able to refer you to someone in the area and maybe talk to his doctor.
Can't you speak to the local
Can't you speak to the local police and ask them to scare the living crap out of him? I.e put him in the cells for the night, thus showing him that you are unwilling to put up with him and his temper?
If your insurance will cover
If your insurance will cover counseling, go in it as a family- and he can get help that way, PLUS BM can't say anything because it is family counseling. If you are NCP then she can only stop mental health treatment of the child individually (or that is how it is in our state).