What kind of personality is this? BM only has the capability to do one thing at a time for example
If she's going to school, she will get good grades etc and just focus on that but... everything else falls by the wayside, kids included.
If she happens to have a job, she doesn't do anything else, misses appointments,everything falls by the wayside.
It's like she has a one track mind, DH said, she had a very difficult time multitasking, she just can't do it.
It's "one" thing at a time and nothing will matter to her but that one thing she's doing for the moment.
We work, have the kids in sports, have a lot of extra curriculars, and are doing about a thousand things, I don't see how I could just go to work, but ignore my house, kids, husband, and the world around me..
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Its what alcoholics call an
Its what alcoholics call an addictive personality. If you find something you like, you do more of it. And more, and more, and more, and more, and more...until it is the center of your life.
Sounds to me like brain
Sounds to me like brain damage. LOL! But really, has she ever been checked out by a doctor for this? Could it be obsessive personality disorder? I can't imagine anyone liking work or school THAT much that they ignore everything else in their lives, family included. Weird. Perhaps the reason for her divorce?
Well I believe she's bipolar
Well I believe she's bipolar and a severe narcissist and her excuse for not doing anything other than the task at hand is:
I work OR
I'm in school OR whatever..
I didn't give my son his medicine for his impacted bowel, because "I had to work" The Dr. told her.. "Honey, lots of people work, that is NO EXCUSE!"
I agree with mrsparks. I
I agree with mrsparks. I lived with a severe narcissist. She only focused on one thing. The kids and their needs /wants. The marriage went to hell.
Hmmm. Sounds like our BM,
Hmmm. Sounds like our BM, which has puzzled me for a while. All she does is go to her job. No hobbies, no interests. NONE. I have never met anyone like that. Also, no housework, child care, shopping, cooking, gardening, etc (DH did it ALL). She is one of those who says she wants to do stuff (biking, start a business, exercise, sing for a band) but the interest lasts a nanosecond. DH used to "invest" in things for her only to dust them off for the next ten years.
In contrast, DH and I are driven--and when I was raising my kids I worked F/T, got a MBA, gardened, volunteered, hiked, kayaked, socialized...and took care of the house/kids. My EX was similar to BM in that I did everything around the house, he did have hobbies and those were the center of his life! LOL.
You hit the nail right on the
You hit the nail right on the head, that is it EXACTLY and DH used to do "everything" include work 2 jobs and take care of the household and her children.
Who can be like that on a regular basis?!
Found a description of BM's
Found a description of BM's personality disorder:
http://www.outofthefog.net/Disorders/DPD.html
It's puzzled me for years to see someone so infantile.
excellent!!! thank you for
excellent!!! thank you for the article!
I wrote a more in-depth
I wrote a more in-depth "essay" about our situation...see what you think
http://www.steptalk.org/node/27696
It's sometimes a sign of a
It's sometimes a sign of a type of ADHD. People's brains can be naturally so all over the place that they sort of learn / train themselves to focus on one thing that's really important they do "right" and everything else falls by the wayside.
Is she male? LOL Sounds
Is she male? LOL Sounds exactly like my DH! Seriously though, DH was told that this can be caused by living to adulthood with undiagnosed and untreated ADD. It would only be ADHD if there is an element of "hyper" in the mix.
Generally speaking, a person with ADD has trouble focusing and is mentally all over the place, but can learn to cope by being able to "hyperfocus" on one thing at a time. Any extraneous stimulus could easily throw them off track, so they learn to tune it all out.