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Resentment

mommyhopes's picture

Submitted by mommyhopes on Wed, 01/26/2011 - 6:46pm

Hello Everyone - I am new to the site and I have to get something off of my chest. I am the SM to SD5. She is a good kid for the most part but BM has always been an issue. DH and I are trying to have bio children but I am having fertility issues. I can't help but feel strong resentment toward SD and BM. Although I care for SD, when I see her I start to see her as a representation of what I can't have with DH...a child. I'm sure it will happen at some point but BM got prego by "mistake" after they had only known each other for a few weeks! I know it is unfair but I can't help these feelings. Help! Sad

Comments

aggravated1's picture

Submitted by aggravated1 on Wed, 01/26/2011 - 7:17pm

Welcome to the board!
I know there have been some others on the board that have had these issues/feelings too, but I can't think right off who they were.

I have teenagers, so I can't really relate to this one right now, Smile but I hope someone here can.
YOu ARE normal for feeling that way.

mom23ms's picture

Submitted by mom23ms on Wed, 01/26/2011 - 7:48pm

Though I don't have fertility problems I know how you feel. I have bio kids of my own and so does my SO. HOWEVER, I would have (at one point) loved to have a baby with my SO but he got a vasectomy with the girls BM. So I have felt resentment with his kids from early on. However his children are just out of control and I can't help but to think that maybe it was for the best for me. Not in your case though...don't be to hard on yourself. It will happen. Happy Trying!

sherbear01's picture

Submitted by sherbear01 on Thu, 01/27/2011 - 1:02am

I can feel for you. It took me about 8 months to conceive our child after a miscarriage. I was devastated and also felt resentful that he had this experience with bm (granted it wasn't planned). I have no good advice how to overcome those feelings but know you are not alone.

Good luck Smile