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Husbands and SD

Maxie's picture

Submitted by Maxie on Sun, 10/19/2014 - 10:45am

Submitted by Maxie on Sun, 10/19/2014 - 12:02am.
I have this exact same problem, but his girls are 52, 51, and 50. They have gone as far to tell me they need the house on certain dates and do not want us here. They have asked us to leave our home for their teen age boys (grandsons) to come for a vacation with their girlfriends. I recently had and experience of loosing a brother in law suddenly, and you will not believe what went on. First off the brother in law that passeda way lived in the country next to where we also have a country house/hunting camp. We were called the day before leaving to attend the services and was notified that their mother would be sleeping in our bedroom and we should bring our camper. I must say this was quite a shock to me since the ex wife had not seen nor had contact with the deceased nor his family. Therefore I decided not to be a part of the circus, and not be a part of this at a funeral service where all would be gatherinf at the our country house after the services... As it turns out I am the bad guy, my husband is mad at me? The deceased wife called me and said she totally understood and had no idear what her brother was thinking of, and that his ex should be at a hotel if she wanted to attend the service of someone she has not spoken to in 40 years.. But i am the bad guy. And no they are not getting back together, and yes I actually like her and have attended many functions with both of us being there, I hug and greet her. Please tell me if I m wrong, for I feel this is a fine line that was crossed. I also feel like sending a book " Miss Maners" tot hem all. But my husband's youngest (50) is a control freak, and is still trying to get these two back together at any cost. I mean they have been divorced 40 years and both remarried and divorced again before I ever came into the picture... So my husband has not been home since August and wants me out of the house? I feel like he stole my anger. It is actually funny at this age. Anyway the advice you are being given as to make sure you know what you say and please be aware of the ramifications of your talk. And if anyone has any advice for me, please chime in. There is so many variables in my situation, and so much dissappointment, that I am not sure it is not such a bad idea, we getting a divorce. But as for me leaving and he not being here, well that is just not going to happen. He will have to come and resolve this in person, for I also have invested a lot of money in this home... HELP... who would think a SD would be calling the shots in your marriage at 67 years of age. It is amazing, if she says jump he ask how high. Not exagerating...

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Maxie's picture

Submitted by Maxie on Sun, 10/19/2014 - 12:47pm

Anything he buys he puts in there name lately. We have been together 14 years married 8. He used to live with me, after Katrina recovery we moved into his home... I am so beside myself and have been for awhile. This is the cheapest man I have ever met. Regardless of what we do, i have to pay half of it, which includes his lowlife non working nephews that he takes to dinner with us and of course they bring a friend that I must share in the cost of their dinner. The ball breaker was when I put a stop to paying half of the trips to visit his daughters and grandchildren. I finally got the nerve to tell him when we travel out of town to see his children it will be on his nickel and the same for me.... He has absolutely thrown a fit about this. I am paying for me and only me from August on...

Maxie's picture

Submitted by Maxie on Sun, 10/19/2014 - 12:50pm

I think you are correct, but my health is from the military and if divorced I will only have it for a year... Do you think I can buy a term policy on a man that will be 77 yrs of age in December?

Maxie's picture

Submitted by Maxie on Sun, 10/19/2014 - 5:00pm

Please help me out here. Are you saying you bought a term policy on a man 77 years old? This has really peaked my interest. Because my sweetheart would do the same to me... Were you divorced when you took out the policy? What happens to the policy once you are divorced? Last but not least, I was not aware you could buy a term policy after a certain age. I would love to know more about this when you have some time. Thanks again for your in put... You have helped me to confirm that it is not me being a bitch as I am told.

Maxie's picture

Submitted by Maxie on Sun, 10/19/2014 - 12:52pm

Sorry the only thing we own together is a 42 ft motor yacht, we both owned our homes before marriage. He has bought two homes and put in his daughters names...

Maxie's picture

Submitted by Maxie on Sun, 10/19/2014 - 3:40pm

God you are so right. We have seperate bank accounts plus a joint account to pay for the boat expenses, which of course was in my name and all overdrafts came out of my account. When he got into it for $4k his part (which had nothing to do with the boat), he paid me 2K and had the nerve to tell me he paind me to shut me up? Really. Then we got together with his kids and he told them in front of me there will be no Christmas money this year. Of course the $2K went to them for Christmas that was a partial payment. So that did it, i closed the account and told him it was his turn to handle this account. He was to open a joint account but instead had the boat note transferred to his account that I have no access to. Can you believe he wants me to put money in his account rather then pay the boat loan directly and the Marina slip directly? I am not making any deposits into an account I do not see where my deposit is going... We each put a thousand in this account, but what ticked me off was all the money went to him and his family, so i said i will pay my half of the boat expenses upon a receipt to see what it is for, only. No more extra money. If we happen to go to dinner i am capable of paying for my own meal. I am just floored that a man this age is like this. Maybe I have been wrong all my life but think this is the time you make ammends with your maker and enjoy life. This jackass just moved all my appliances from my house to his? I have top of the line appliances.. I feelt his was planned, therefore until I get all I have paid for he is stuck with me.

Maxie's picture

Submitted by Maxie on Sun, 10/19/2014 - 3:40pm

God you are so right. We have seperate bank accounts plus a joint account to pay for the boat expenses, which of course was in my name and all overdrafts came out of my account. When he got into it for $4k his part (which had nothing to do with the boat), he paid me 2K and had the nerve to tell me he paind me to shut me up? Really. Then we got together with his kids and he told them in front of me there will be no Christmas money this year. Of course the $2K went to them for Christmas that was a partial payment. So that did it, i closed the account and told him it was his turn to handle this account. He was to open a joint account but instead had the boat note transferred to his account that I have no access to. Can you believe he wants me to put money in his account rather then pay the boat loan directly and the Marina slip directly? I am not making any deposits into an account I do not see where my deposit is going... We each put a thousand in this account, but what ticked me off was all the money went to him and his family, so i said i will pay my half of the boat expenses upon a receipt to see what it is for, only. No more extra money. If we happen to go to dinner i am capable of paying for my own meal. I am just floored that a man this age is like this. Maybe I have been wrong all my life but think this is the time you make ammends with your maker and enjoy life. This jackass just moved all my appliances from my house to his? I have top of the line appliances.. I feelt his was planned, therefore until I get all I have paid for he is stuck with me.

Maxie's picture

Submitted by Maxie on Sun, 10/19/2014 - 3:40pm

God you are so right. We have seperate bank accounts plus a joint account to pay for the boat expenses, which of course was in my name and all overdrafts came out of my account. When he got into it for $4k his part (which had nothing to do with the boat), he paid me 2K and had the nerve to tell me he paind me to shut me up? Really. Then we got together with his kids and he told them in front of me there will be no Christmas money this year. Of course the $2K went to them for Christmas that was a partial payment. So that did it, i closed the account and told him it was his turn to handle this account. He was to open a joint account but instead had the boat note transferred to his account that I have no access to. Can you believe he wants me to put money in his account rather then pay the boat loan directly and the Marina slip directly? I am not making any deposits into an account I do not see where my deposit is going... We each put a thousand in this account, but what ticked me off was all the money went to him and his family, so i said i will pay my half of the boat expenses upon a receipt to see what it is for, only. No more extra money. If we happen to go to dinner i am capable of paying for my own meal. I am just floored that a man this age is like this. Maybe I have been wrong all my life but think this is the time you make ammends with your maker and enjoy life. This jackass just moved all my appliances from my house to his? I have top of the line appliances.. I feelt his was planned, therefore until I get all I have paid for he is stuck with me.

Maxie's picture

Submitted by Maxie on Sun, 10/19/2014 - 4:05pm

Here is my problem, I work and make more money then he. And I truly did not want anything EXCEPT THE THING THAT CAME FROM MY HOME, and the things I payed for and was in hopes we could agree on things we split. But he is steady moving my things to the country, to include things we purchased together. He is the most greedy person and biggest user of anyone I have ever met. We have had disagreements before, he has left for months at a time, and comes back like nothing has even happened. But i was angry this time and told him to take his two month annual break, for i am disgusted and would rather not see him. So now he has turned it all around to this being his anger. I am like really, are you going to steal my anger also? But this is how the law reads in my state. My being fucked is an understatement.

Spousal Support/Maintenance/Alimony Factors
In MiY STATE the support payments (if any) can certainly influence how the marital property distribution is awarded, which is why it can become a very intricate part of the final outcome of any divorce. Keeping this in mind, if you and your spouse are unable to reach and agreement on this issue, the Chancery Court will order support from one spouse to the other on a case-by-case basis as follows:

The court will make a support award that it believes to be appropriate and fair to both spouses. In doing so, the court will consider the following factors, but not limited to; 1. income and expenses of each spouse; 2. the spouse’s health and medical condition; 3. the spouse’s needs and debt obligations; 4. the custodial award; 5. the ages of the spouse’s; 6. the standard of living while married; 7. tax consequences; 8. any marital fault or misconduct; and dissipation of assets. (Mississippi Code - Section 93 - Chapters: 5-23)

You can also read more about MiY STATE spousal support in the MiY state statutes located at: http://198.187.128.12/mississippi/.

Maxie's picture

Submitted by Maxie on Sun, 10/19/2014 - 10:14pm

Yes you are right. As for receipts I am sure I could put my hands on the. I really do not want to go to court, but looking like I need to or just walk away, and cut my losses. I am so angry that i am to the point that
If he does not give me my things he will not use them either, i will smash up everything of mind, because I will be damn if he is going to keep my things.... Yes I am glad he will die alone, let is kids take care of his old ass...