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frustrated with dinners

marty15's picture

I am so sick of making dinners only to have someone suddenly decide they "don't like that anymore". I come home from work and make a dinner that I *think* these kids like, they they have said they like, only to hear they don't like it anymore.

No, we don't then make them a different dinner, we say "this is what we're having, and you've liked it in the past".

The point is -- they're rude inconsideriate little turds and I really hate cooking for people who don't appreciate it, EVER say thank you, only criticize or say they want something else. I feel like telling DH, when your kids are here, I'm making dinner for just us (something they won't like, like seafood, etc) and you can make your little turds whatever you feel like.

Just venting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, and lastly, to my Skids: When you see me cooking dinner, and you KNOW your dad doesn't make homecooked meals, so clearly even if he happens to be standing in the kitchen at the moment, DO NOT ASK HIM what we are having for dinner, as if he is the one who is cooking it. You know damn well that I am cooking it, so ask ME. I'm always polite and nice to you, aren't I? Yes well then stop asking your F-ing dad what is for dinner when he DOES NOT COOK IT!!!

Comments

checkedoutsm's picture

I always thought about crying and running out of the room. Just as a big red flag to my DH that they were being rude.

luchay's picture

Oh MY GOD!!

You live my life LOL

Right down to I am ONLY EVER THE ONE WHO COOKS - HE WILL BE STANDING RIGHT NEXT TO ME IN THE KITCHEN WHILE I AM COOKING AND THE SKIDS "DAAAADDDDDYYYYY WHAT'S FOR TEA?"

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

And the manipulations over liking it one week, saying how much they like it, then next time they hear we are having that quiet whispers to dadddy "but I don't like it!" So he comes and asks me if they can have something else as they "hate" what is for tea - ummm hello they loved it last time!@! And NO they freaking can't. My kids eat what is put in front of them unless it's something that I know they hate but is someone elses favourite so I am making it because the majority like it but say Miss 9 hates chilli with a passion, both younger bd's hate risotto etc (if that makes sense) they only get a pass on those occasions. The skids - ss9 would have chocolate spread sandwiches or sausages in bread every night if we let him, regardless of what's cooked. SD eats everything but manipulates - tells me she loves chilli but then tells her dad she hates it.

First time I cooked it for them they both loved it. Next time, she's in the kitchen with her face in the pot going "oh yum, that smells good, what is it?" I tell her. Two minutes later OH comes in and whispers to me can she have something else as she is really upset because she hates chilli!! I told him they both loved it last time and what she had literally JUST said to me, but he took her side.

Two weeks later they were here again, and I'm in the kitchen, she didn't know her dad was around the corner on the computer. My bd19 asked what was for tea - I told her and she said "can't we have chilli?" SD pipes up with "Yes, I LOVE chilli - I would rather have chilli too!"

LMAO - should have seen her dads face! Since then he is a little more understanding of the games she plays ....

luchay's picture

Oh yeah, I took myself out of the equation with ss9. I put the food out that we are all having. He eats or not, dad makes him something else at his own discretion now. Not my kid not my problem.

dd6 asked me one night at the dinner table (so there's me, OH, dd's then 19, 9 and 6, sd12 and ss9) and she says "why do we have to eat everything on out plate, the vegies and stuff and ss9 gets to have sausages in bread and not eat his vegies?"

I told them all, "because you are my daughters and you are my responsibility - it is my job as your mother to make sure you grow up healthy and strong and know what is good for your body. OH is ss and sd's parent, it is up to him and their mother to teach them to be healthy."

}:)

The looks on all their faces were priceless, but I figure if that's how OH wants to play it I won't have my bio's feeling like they are being treated unfairly - they will know that they have the rules they do because I love them and want the best for them.

checkedoutsm's picture

that's kind of what I ended up doing, my skids just ate ramen noodles for every meal, and bricks of cheese. They used to gag and fake vomit at the table when I fed them and my DH did nothing.

just.his.wife's picture

"I didn't ask if you liked it. I told you to eat it."

Sit and eat. If they don't eat it is their issue not yours.

MarriedaBallessWonder's picture

I quit cooking period when my step-shit is here. He has been making crappy comments about my cooking for 7 years.

His D goes and gets him fast food. He's already 80 lbs overweight. Who gives a shit if he gains more - I don't.

I have a protien shake and go in my room with the dogs.

Seasons's picture

I got tired of wasting money on food! I quit too after a couple of times of cooking and the skids refusing and DH immediately rescuing the skids and making deals with them regarding food.... Uh no way, my Bkids appreciated dinner that was made for them. It gets even more out of control when DH goes to this fast food to get SS15 his food then across town to get SD16 her dinner. I got tired of traveling around town then so I told DH you just go (waste your money) I don't want the headache!! The skids bitch and complain about everything that there is it doesn't matter what it is I have never seen anything like this.. DH says yes well your BD21 did the same thing and I have to remind DH yes and do you remember when I would take away privileges and she would get so angry with me? I disciplined BD21 when she was 13-17 hell I still get after her if she is disrespectful to me or DH. The road doesn't go both ways however, so I choose to hardly eat a meal with the skids because of all the fighting and bitching. Thanks for letting me share.

cant win for losin's picture

This was my BD. Picky picky picky!!!!!! I can't curse about it too much, cause i myself am picky! It was (and at times still is, but has gotten better as she has gotten older) infuriating to cook my ass off in the kitchen just to be told rudely she didn't like something, even though she liked it before.

In my house, we do not have a short order menu. You eat what is served. I always tried to keep in mind they didn't like something. If it couldn't be avoided, I just didn't give them much of it on their plate. If I could change some ingrediants without adding to my work load I would. And if every so often they really (mostly her) really really hated something and was poking at their food, they could make themselves a sandwich, or eat a bowl of cereal. No dessert. Should've ate what was for dinner.

When I can reflect a little more now, I realize what bothered and hurt me the most was the way my daughter would let it be known she didn't like what i made. My son although it wouldn't happen often, would tell me how it wasn't his favorite, and didn't really care for it, but it was still good. LOL His APPROACH was softer. Versus my daughter coming in while i am making it, after working 8-10 hours, walking right in the door directly to kitchen, and her asking what's for dinner, turning her nose up and making a face, and letting me know verbally what she thought of that choice. Night after night. So i started not telling ANYONE in the house what was for dinner. fdh gets so mad. "i don't complain. i like everything you make" And he does, and he probably wouldn't ever complain, but i am seriously so scarred from that "pre dinner bitching" i just can't. it totally stressed me out. There were times I would cry.
So years later, i still don't tell what is for dinner, and my daughter has picked up some tact, and has stayed more consistent with her taste buds.

marty15's picture

Thank you all for validating my feelings. And cant win for losing I totally understand how it hurt your feelings. It does hurt one's feelings to make food for someone who rejects that food so rudely and inconsiderately.

I told DH tonight I'm done cooking for them and he will just have to feed them whatever when he gets home from work. I said, I'm sorry because I get home earlier than you and have more time to cook but I'm just not doing it any more.

So stupid shits can expect a lot of canned soup, sandwiches, etc. for dinner because that's what DH will make them. Hmmmmm they might fondly recall days of turning up their noses at a hot real home cooked meals!!! Too bad, I'm done.