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H wants to see my BS after 2.5 months

LindaL's picture

Just an update, I got a text from H asking to see the baby after 2 months and a half of him being totally absent, because according to him "he is leaving the state", but I found out through my SIL that the reason is becuase I filed for CS everybody in his family advised him that he should be able to see the baby because he is going to have to pay for him (I never said that he couldn't see him btw) ...Jawdropping! so not because he wants to do the right thing and be a good I'm taking the baby to meet him on monday and lets see what drama comes out of that...I just can't believe that he is giving everybody grieve because I filed for CS...seriously?? what was he expecting me to do? he gives BM her CS every month without complaining and with a smile on his face because that makes him a good father, but I'm a B!atch because I filed! and in his texts he was giving me a lecture of "how much he loves his kids more than enybody else in this world" just to make it clear to me, just in case I had forgotten.....I think on monday I'm just going to bring a book with me and wait for the time to go by fast....any advice??


LindaL's picture

Hi AD, I know I haven't been here in a while...I've been really stressing out trying to make my ends meet, but I got a new job now and it seems that everything is starting to look brighter here Smile
He texted me on wednesday demanding to see his son as soon and as much as possible because "he is leaving the state" I don't really know if that is the truth or if is only a way of trying to make me feel guilty. But I absolutely agree with you it really makes me angry that "he is paying to see his child" when I never said that he wasn't allowed to see him in the first place, and how that gives him the right to play the victim role...unbelieveable!!

LindaL's picture

Yes, that's what I thought, I'm just going to agree with any visitation he wants, and try to work with him but I really think that eventually he is just going to stop....and it is sad I just want the best for my son and if not having his dad around is the best be it...

caregiver1127's picture

That is a hard concept for some people to swallow but I believe the same thing - sometimes it is not in the best interest of the child to have their bio parent in their life especially if it is going to be very disruptive. Good Luck!

LindaL's picture

Yes, I was thinking about moving to Texas and I was concerned that it was going to be very difficult because he would have to agree, but if he moves first I can go anywhere I want....Thanks AD!

LindaL's picture

Hey Fabumom, I think he meant his other kids, let him build the guiltiness with my son and then he will be in that category.....and I agree he is a huge jerk. I just can hope for monday to go by smoothly without any drama..

VAStepMom's picture

The first thing that came to mind for me, was:

Do your son a favor. Take pictures of his father holding him....during visitation, because you may be surprised --it may be the last time you see him, or the only opportunity you will have to be able to take the picture while he is a baby.

I hope he bonds with your son and wants to really be a part of his life... but just in case, your son will always have the photo of his father holding him.

Best of luck.

LindaL's picture

what you are saying is very sad, but is even sadder that you are right, I think what hurts the most is that my child one day is going to ask me about his dad and that breaks my heart.