Why it's different
Please note above says "why it's different" not "stepdads have it easier" This is my situation
I'm a weird person. I constantly over process information to the point I rarely sleep.
Something that my DH always says kind of bothered me " it wasn't so hard for me"
Now while I can get into the obvious - her kid did not have a present father, you had time to build a relationship etc. Here's where I figured out the actual issue to a pinpoint.
She moved without consulting her teenage son for no reason. She moved without really considering any of the kids. She moved not for a job but for her.
The kids had their own rooms back home. They slept there until the giant move. They started cosleeping once she moved.
Her son once a shy but friendly teen started doing small crimes for attention. His girlfriend stays overnight. Their home their rules but bad example. Not to mention everything this kid has done that should have been a wake up call to BM
DHs kids have plenty issues. Being on bottles too long , constantly having UTIs and yeast infections ( I seriously considering calling CPS because something isn't right at that age) and at our place we do curve these issues.
But it's different. He dealt with a kid that was independent and never his responsibility. Now I get shamed for sleeping too long or staying away from kids that were never really taught better. If I disagree with what he's doing instead of causing a fuss I leave. He gets pissy . It's been fun.
Sad thing is we have gone through worse conflict together but anything with the kids he balloons to extreme measures
I'm half let's stay upstairs and start hoarding money and other half I'll be there to try but will comment if he's deciding to parent poorly.
Truly all of you- step parent life is pretty much close to hell. Yes I've considered it- I wish he'd understand that's why I think about it.