SoTired1
Give me a break! This child is a child that has been allowed to over-step his boundaries too many times. Who is the child versus the adult? You seem too have a passive-type, nonassertive-type personality, which is why this kid continues to progress in his disrespect towards you & his physical behavior towards you. Where is your husband when HIS child is acting-out towards you & what does he has to say about all this nonsense?? Girl, I truly believe I'd be in jail from opening a can of whup-az on him! He would never think on raising his hand on another adult as long as he lived. I think, if you haven't already, you need to talk to your husband about his son's behavior towards you. Forget about this therapist (that's even if the therapiist advised him to do what he did. . . you know that children lie, considerably). On second thought, perhaps have your husband consult with the therapist about what his son did & get to the bottom of this. Afterwards, I would strongly suggest seeking another therapist. . . it just seems ridiculous that a therapist would make such a suggestion to a child. I strongly believe your SS is a huge liar & he can't be trusted! There is no way I would be feeling like a stranger in my very own home; that child would have to return to his mother or another caretaker if the BM is not available. No way, not me. . . I would not be hiding out in my room not being able to use various areas of my home. Good luck to you. . .the next time this child places his hands on you, you should call the police immediately & file charges against him. This type of behavior warrants him some quality time sitting in a jail cell to think about how out of control his actions are!

I have a lot of pity for you honey but really I agree with sotired1...You've got to get your nerve up and start fighting back. If that means ruffling your ss's and dh's feathers than so be it...at least you'd be safe. Hell I'd even condone ordering a taser online and the next time that little shithead puts his hands on you, give him the shock of his life. I'd do that to my own son if he was a teenager beating and hitting me...sorry but I'd f**k his little ass up if he EVER put his hands on me. Your husband needs to grow a set and put his babyboy in his place.

This is just so jacked up it's not even funny...

~The aim of life is self-development. To realize one's nature perfectly - that is what each of us is here for.~
Oscar Wilde

I'm surprised his father didn't have a talk after that conversation.
I agree with others
1. change therapist....cause that discussion was useless, it basically empowered this kid
2. I would have a sit down with the entire family, kid and hubby. And basically say
' So you hate me.....well you have to figure out why you hate me but let me make this very clear to you. IM an adult a human being, who deserves and demands respect from anyother person in this household. So you cannot hit, curse and be disrespectful. If you do, you will get grounded, things taken away. (by the way, your dh has to back you up and if he doesn't, then tell him and his son to take a flying F out your door!) You have emotions you must deal with and discuss as well with your father. I've never done anything wrong ot you and to tell me in my own household youwish i could die is WRONG and EVIL. How woudl you feel if i told you ' yah ss, your an idiot, i hate you and home you die as well'? Whatabout that? how would you feel if someone said this to you? No good eh? wEll never say this to another human being again.
This therapist is a crock to tell your ss to express his hate and say he wishes for you to die and not understand those feelings....absolute BS
Please, take control of your life and household. Have a family meeting to clearly state where you stand as a human being, not as a stepmother or wife. AS a human being in yoru household. Even with your dear dh on this. Either things change or they are out. You can find better.

I TOTALLY forgot to say this but I recommend self defense classes...worried about your safety honey and I think you need to protect yourself at this point. I'm really sorry you're going through this I can't even begin to imagine what it must be like to live in fear and under constant strain. I'm sorry.

~The aim of life is self-development. To realize one's nature perfectly - that is what each of us is here for.~
Oscar Wilde

The answer to your question is no. Obviously not by the way you and your husband are handling this.

If you're afraid how your husband will respond when you tell him that until this kid is under control ALL of his visits will have to be someplace else, this isn't the man for you. A spouse is supposed to foresake all others.

There is no way I would be sequestered in my room so this little turd can rule the roost. This is your home too. You get to say who enters it too. If this boy is treating you this way and physically assaulting you, you need to stop him from coming to your home. You don't have to put up with his crap. Use that spine we all know you have.

Stand up for yourself Honey. Do not allow this little terror - to hit you, yell at you, or anything like that. Your husband should be making him respect you and you need to make him respect you as well.

It raises a question in my mind - what in the hell is wrong with you and your DH as well. Is you DH being disrespectful to you as well. He is not teaching his son any manners or respect for women or the "woman" of the house.

You need to sit down with your husband and have a heart to heart talk - some type of plan needs to be made and followed as to the behavior of the son and the father allowing it.

Then you both need to sit down with the step-son and with a united front - set some ground rules for behavior and consequences. Then follow through. Things may seem even worse at first but he will soon learn how to behave.

I would not put myself in "timeout" for an unruly child. That is totally unacceptable and his father needs to step up as well.

********She doesn't have to love me or even like me - it doesn't change a dang thing..... So get over it and move on BM!************

This child sounds to have some major issues, not to down your SS but something needs to give in the situation. I would switch his therapist. Maybe to a child physhologist.