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Father's Day, Don't Know How to Feel

KatDarling's picture

Submitted by KatDarling on Mon, 06/13/2011 - 1:46pm

For Father's Day FDH and I planned to take FSD9 to the opening of a museum exhibit we all had been excited for, we planned to go on Saturday, the day before Father's Day.

We called BM today and she just goes, "oh, we're going to the beach for the weekend".

On one hand the museum exhibit will be much more enjoyable with just me and FDH. However, I can't help but think that BM is being a bit rude. I'm sure she would be annoyed if we randomly took FSD to the beach over Mother's Day weekend. Also, FDH is upset but sees no point in fighting it. I'm not sure if I do either. This is the problem with not having a court enforced visitation schedule.

I'm trying to just not give a shit. It's not my kid, and I try not to care if BM is a bitch. It just annoys me that FDH will most likely not say anything to BM, if he doesn't assert himself to her than he better not come whining to me that he isn't seeing FSD for Father's Day.

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KatDarling's picture

Submitted by KatDarling on Mon, 06/13/2011 - 2:55pm

UPDATE

:jawdrop:

Holy shit! My FDH and I just worked as a team! He actually agreed with me that we had to be assertive with BM and BM agreed we could take FSD. We get FSD for the whole weekend, Friday, the museum on Saturday and then Father's Day on Sunday.

FDH agreed with me, we acted as a unit, and BM agreed. I think hell just froze over. Even though I know FSD will slightly annoy me and FDH will parent at 75% the whole weekend I'm still happy.

MamaBecky's picture

Submitted by MamaBecky on Mon, 06/13/2011 - 3:50pm

Good for you. We dont have a CO either just a "parenting time as the two parents agree" clause. That does not mean that your DH is not entitled. We default to the parenting time guideline for our state (aka state minimums) when there are dissagreements. We also inform BM upfront and with sincerity that if we cant agree we have no problem getting a specific item by item CO. She likes the flexibility of being able to agree on our own terms, so she doesnt push back hard once we give a friendly shove.