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I will try and work on it .............. 5 Years Later

iubbal's picture

Well, I was looking for a way to vent and deal with the frustrations of raising/living with stepchildren that are spoiled and have issues with self-control. I Found It! If anything I can at least release through journaling........

My story is typical I am sure. Divorced after 19 yrs of agony. Dated for a while and found the woman of my dreams, that has 3 children. We marry and start our life(lives) together.... Enter my 5 biological and her 3 .

As confident and intelligent as I think I am, I didnt really think this one through. I love my wife dearly, but dealing with someone else's parenting, that doesnt in anyway line up with mine, has been tough.

Today's episode is "I will try and work on it"

Of the 3 stepchildren, we have grown man married with child, 17 yr old boy (ocd) and 15 yr old girl.

The big challenge has always been the 15 yr old girl. For obvious reasons spouse has spoiled her baby and she basically does what she wants when she wants and as long as she can weather the verbal tongue lashing when she gets caught, she keeps on keeping on.

We have set clear rules, expectations of what is to be acceptable behavior and what is not. We have house rules like everyone. But sd doesnt follow unless she wants to follow.

So I go upstairs where ss, son & sd bedrooms are. I look in hers and I find, A. 2 wet towels on the floor . B. dirty clothes and clean clothes literally all over room. C. Bed that looks like it was made by a blind 4 yr old in a hurry to go to the fair. D. A pile of dog poop (not allowed to have dog in room because sd will not get up from game play to take dog out) and a large wet spot in carpet of dog urine. All the other children are required to make bed in the morning before school and they do. They also put dirty clothes in hamper, generally, after shower or whenever. It is never acceptable to throw clothes on floor and leave them there.

Her mother asked me to bring her in to the loop when there is a problem, so I do. I asked sd why after 5 years of telling her not to leave wet towels on carpet, she is still doing it. Her response is "I don't know". She then said "I will try and work on it". At this point I am so infuriated with the slothfull behavior and the disrespect, I cant see straight. GEE Thanks for trying to work on not being a lazy slob everyday of your life and pick up after yourself.

Episode 2 - Today at lunch I go home for a sandwich, the kids where home today from school, and I go and get bread and it is just wadded up and stuck in bread cabinet. The twist tie was laying out on counter. I asked who left it out and why didnt they put it back on so the bread will stay fresh for the next person. The reply was "I dont know". Then walks down sd...... We have a guideline of not putting your feet up on couch without socks or footies, so to keep the couch nice and plus the hygiene is not great at times by offenders. Sure enough sd plops her butt down on couch and puts her feet up on sofa. I have asked her more than 24 times not to do that but she refuses. She barely can make it down stairs from her room due to energy demands of non-eating related activities........... (that was mean but I dont care anymore). STAY TUNED FOR TOMORROWS EPISODE..... Why did you put dishes away that were unclean? "I dont know"

Comments

young_step_mom's picture

Welcome iubbal! Sounds like most SKs here, I am sure you will find that you have a lot in common with us. Looking forward to the next episode. Smile

reeny511's picture

I feel for you. This is my life also. SD11 is a slob and her answer for why she does the things she does is "I dont know." It drives me CRAZY!!! Welcome!

EnigmaMCMLXIV's picture

See there is a perfect reason why I won't physically move in with my boyfriend. I have my own home and he has his. No way would I sell my home and put up with his children. Sooner live in a pup tent. I feel for you!

myhusbandswife's picture

You have TONS of understanding, supportive step parents here!!! Vent all you want! We HEAR you! P.s. Don't even get me started on the towel thing. I swear it's on purpose at this point.