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In Rememberance

Happyhippos242's picture

On 10/13/1993 my father suddenly and unexpectedly past away. After 17 years this date is always a bit melancholy. It seems like a lot of people have lost loved ones recently and although I know that time really does heal all wounds and the pain will eventually start to subside for those people, I also know that the feeling of loss really never goes away.

I always spend this day remembering things about my dad - his quirky sense of humor is definitely the first thing I think of. He used to LOVE to mess with my mom and tell her she had NO sense of humor, which even to this day still gets her riled up when I say it. Both my parents were avid readers and sometimes when my mom wasn't around my dad would pick up her book and flip through to the back and find names of people or places specific to the book. Later, randomly during dinner or a discussion he would tell a story about a guy at work or something her saw and start interjecting the tid bits from my Moms book. the whole time my mom was getting excited saying "the so weird, thats the name of the main character in my book!"...etc... Dad would keep that going for days and not until later would he ever fess up to it.

Another of my favorite memories was when we would be driving somewhere together, just us, and he would tell me stories about when he was in the airforce or stories about crazy stuff he did as a kid. Sometimes it was stuff he never even told my mom about and it made me feel really special and close to him. On many occasions my dad would look at me and say "ya know happyhippos, you don't have to live like a refugee". Totally straight faced. And I was soooo confused every time he said this "what does that mean???" and he would just repeat it "you dont have to live like a refugee". I NEVER understood it and he never explained it. I would say about ten years ago I was listening to a classic rock station and a TOM PETTY song came on singing "you don't have to live like a refugee"!! I laughed and cried at the same time! It was just another one of his weird "jokes" and it took so many years for me to get it. I know he would hae laughed his ass off if he could of seen my face.

It makes me happy to remember my dad but I wish the sad feelings didnt wash over me. I know it doesn't do any good but I hate knowing that my 11 month old nephew will never know his grandfather. Or that my fiancee could never meet my dad. It's not something I dwell on or anything, just something I think about from time to time.

Anyway, some years on this day I might go through old pictures or watch one of my dads favorite movies. This year I decided to share it here. My dad was such an awesome person and I will always miss him.

Comments

SoTired1's picture

Thank you, Happyhippos, for sharing the loving memory of your father with us. I want you to know that you caused me to smile as I read about your father's sense of humor. I love to laugh & he sounds like a man who really knew how to pop off a few good ones, lol. I love what he did to your mom about the novel she was reading . . . that was an original. I, myself, love Tom Petty & the heartbreakers. I'm going to have to pull out their greatest hits CD to listen to that song (I'm not familiar with that title). Try not to be sad about your father's inevitable departure. He simply did what all of us have to do one day. He's in a better place now & based on how you've described him your father wouldn't want you to ever have a gloomy moment b/c he had to leave. He'd want you to be full of laughter & smiles. You've described your father very well in writing so although your nephew will not be able to meet his grandfather in the physical form (through you) he'll be able to know him in a spiritual way. Please share those loving memories of your father with him when he's old enough to understand. I know he'll love his grandfather & only wish he could have [physically] met him. That's how I feel about my maternal grandmother & maternal great-grandmother. Both died before my conception (yet alone birth), but my mom ensured I know them through her loving memory stories & I truly wish I could have met them in the physical form. I look at their pictures & they were beautiful women but I know in my heart that God needed them more so they had to go . . . the same as with your loving father. Again, thank you so much for sharing your father's loving memory with us here at steptalk. Many blessings to you.

imagr8tma's picture

Thank you for sharing the great memories of your dad with us. I know how precious those memories are. Although I have not lost my dad, I assessed our relationship last year when my grandfather passed away and it is a absolutely great one. It is wonderful to know someone who has had an amazing relationship with their father. I am sad to know that you lost a great man in your life.... but honored to see you look back and smile about him and his memory in your life. Thank you for sharing a great memory of a great dad.

stormabruin's picture

Thank you for sharing your memories. When I leave this world I can only hope my loved ones will carry happy memories of me with them throughout their lives. It sounds like you were blessed with a father who took great joy in the family he had. Smile