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How soon?

Ginger's picture

For those of you who have read my blogs you know that I recently had a miscarry. My doctor told me that we can try again after 1 normal cycle. I expcet that will be happening in the next 2-4 weeks. I feel great physically and I am ready to try again, but part of me worries that it may be too soon. I am curious if anyone has gone through something like this and if you were able to conceive right away. I am really looking forward to FINALLY having one of my own.

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happy's picture

But a friend of mine tried soon after the first miscarry and the second and third and finally after the 6th in a year and 1/2 she got pregnant and has her son. SO its listening to the Dr. but also listening to yourself. You may think its to soon emotionally? does that make sense..
I wish you luck..

Happy

" make sure you tell the people you love most EVERYDAY.. Its important not only for them to know but for you to tell.. Life is to short to be miserable..

Ginger's picture

Happy, did it take your friend 6 months to concieve? Did she have any miscarries in between?

happy's picture

her a long time to conceive the first one and then it seems like they just kept getting pregnant and loosing them. And then they had a son. And let me tell you he is spoiled rotten, and I think its becasue of all the trauma.. You know..

Happy

" make sure you tell the people you love most EVERYDAY.. Its important not only for them to know but for you to tell.. Life is to short to be miserable..

Ginger's picture

That is exactly what I am afraid of. Your friend must be really strong to go through that so many times and still keep trying. If you want something bad enough, you can't lose hope. I just don't want to push it, try too soon and then have to go through this again.

dbsojo's picture

Both of sisters-in-law have had miscarriages, but I've never been pregnant. This is how it was explained to me (as I was a young teen at the time-they were pretty close together). My mom explained to me that a miscarriage is sometimes nature's way of making sure we give birth to healthy babies. Often when someone miscarries it means that there was something wrong with the baby that it probably wouldn't have been able to cope with outside of the womb. The whole process is very painful, I'd imagine, regardless. I bet you're thinking that you would've loved your baby whether or not anything was wrong with it, but if all mothers were able to birth these babies, we'd have a world full of moms trying to take care of their sick babies. Babies that still wouldn't be able to live to fulfill a productive adulthood, no matter how much their parents loved them. It's a hard fact of nature, but statistically- one has to be healthy eventually. In the case of my two sisters-in-law, one got pregant not too long after (maybe 6 months, or something close), and had a healthy baby boy. The other, to my knowledge, got pregant a year or two later (but I don't think they were trying), and gave birth to twins!

The point here is that so long as you and your husband are healthy, I would keep trying. That's all you can do, and the rest is up to God. And God just wants to make sure that you can have a happy healthy kid, and if it takes some pain and perseverance in the mean time, it will be all the sweeter for you guys when you finally get to hold him/her.

Good luck-prayers and good thoughts with you.

Anne 8102's picture

My first miscarriage was at six weeks. I got pregnant again before I even had another period and ended up with a bouncing baby girl monster. It wasn't planned. We were still grieving and not even thinking about birth control yet. I think a lot depends upon how far along you are when you miscarry. After my second miscarriage, which was further along, they told me to wait three periods, but we didn't try again after that.

If you weren't that far along and it wasn't anything worse than a typical or slightly more heavy period, then you probably have nothing to worry about if you get pregnant right away. If you didn't have any problems conceiving before, you probably won't have any this time, either.

Here's something that my doctor told me... pregnancy tests today are so sensitive that you can take them four days before you even miss your period and get a positive result. Unfortunately, not all pregnancies "take" and sometimes women miscarry early. If they hadn't taken a test, they would never know it was a miscarriage. They would just think that their period was a little later and heavier than usual, but no big deal. Then they would immediately try again and many could get pregnant on the very next cycle. This was how my ob/gyn explained it to me. She said that she recommended not even testing until you're at least two weeks late, because most early miscarriages happen right around the time of the expected period. And if you don't know you're pregnant, then you don't suffer the loss of the miscarriage... it's just another period. She also said that while they recommend waiting at least one cycle before trying again, if it was an early miscarriage with no complications and the mother is healthy and ready, there's really no reason to not try again immediately. But definitely follow your doctor's instructions, your own heart and your body's signals and you'll be just fine! Good luck and keep us posted!

~ Anne ~

Ladies and gentlemen, take my advice: Pull down your pants and slide on the ice! -M*A*S*H (Sidney Freedman to the OR staff on dealing with stress)

Ginger's picture

Anne, thank you so much! Its so nice to hear of a success story like yours. I was about 3 months along when I miscarried, but the baby was a little underdeveloped so it had stopped growing a few weeks before. However, the actual miscarry happened around what would have been 3 months. So I am still debating on waiting a cycle or not, but I will keep you all posted. Thanks again to all of you who shared.

proud mom's picture

I miscarried at 14 weeks and concived my youngest (unplanned due to the depression the miscarriage had caused) Needless to say I concieved the first time we did anything after having a DNC apx 2 weeks. I never had a cycle the way my Dr explained it was that the DNC cleaned everything out and made me more fertal than usual( although I never had any problems with the first 2 all I had to do was look at the thing wrong lol) Anyway you will know when you are ready.
Good luck!!!!

OldTimer's picture

I miscarried for the first time with my DH this past February. Before that, I had miscarried with my ex twice in the 6 years we were together. But I'm not 'trying' to get pregnant (well, maybe a LITTLE bit! LOL... but not really).

I've been told that you should wait at least one full cycle. Every woman is different, so it could just be one month, or take up to three or more months. A friend of mine miscarried and it took her six months before she had a 'regular' period! But I think it was due to stress. She hated her job, hated her house, hated her car... pretty much hated everything and complained and complained and complained! LOL... But, she LOVED her husband!

Wink StepMom

Man has the intelligence to change his life,
Sometimes, he just fails to use it...

sweetthing's picture

after my ectopic. But I have only half the plumbing, LOL. DH & I refer to it as sex on demand time, or the worst sex ever. Because of my age( 38) and my FSH levels ( borderline) I did a round of Clomid. My one good side wouldn't ovulate naturally. I got pregnant the first round.I am almost 23 weeks now with a baby boy. I was a day late when I took my first pregnancy test & it barely lit up the test...very faint line. It was very scary as woman who have ectopic has a 20% reoccurance rate & your hcg levels are generally low.

We started trying right away after my first cycle. It can be really trying when you want a baby so badly, but hang in there. I am really sorry for your loss, I know how badly it hurts.