Frustrated,

I am sorry to hear about the trial and tribulations that you are experiencing with your relationship.

Over the years I have recognized what I call Rags three day rule.

It is pretty simple. When dealing with the demise of relationships or most extremely emotionally painful experiences it only hurts really bad for about three days. After day three each successive day it hurts a little less until at some point the experience that caused the pain is just an unpleasant memory.

It you do not believe that your relationship is salvageable then I recommend that you stop reopening the emotional wounds and do not call him any more. Get to day three and improve from there. Each time you reengage with him on this you reset the clock.

Just my thoughts of course.

Good luck and best regards,

Frustrated,
I am so very sorry that he would not even sit down to work out a compromise with you on this. A timeline, like you said, to get things rolling. I think that if you maybe saw even a glimmer of hope, maybe you could move forward in this relationship.

Sadly, his refusal spoke volumes.

I know you love this man. I know you have loved him for a long time. But you also know, deep in your heart, that this relationship would have left you so emotionally empty, that you are probably doing the smartest thing to walk away.

Even though right now it seems like it's also the hardest.

But you will be ok. Go back to your original post from three weeks ago. Print it out and save it. And in one year take it out and re-read it to yourself. I bet you will be smiling to yourself, knowing that you've made a great decision.

Stay strong and be happy.

"If you have never been hated by a child, you have never been a parent."
-Bette Davis

You know...where you fight, kind of leave, and somehow wind up back together. Been there done that myself in this and other relationships. It seems like your guy is waiting for you to do the 'come back' part of the dance...and so far you're holding out and throwing him off his game.
I honestly dont have any great words of advice or wisdom to give you. I just can say that you need to do what you want to do and what you can live with. If you need to go back to him and try again, even if it means bending on your part, then do it...you are the only one you're accountable to, and if you can live with that and that's what you want then go for it. But if you want to be done with him and not go back to the same old thing and you are *ready* to move on, then keep moving on.
I think 5teens was right...his refusal to talk is speaking volumes that you're not hearing. If he wanted you back and was willing to compromise, he would compromise...but he's not. He's expecting you to cave and do what he wants if he pouts enough.

"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere

I'm learning-late in life for most-that if you don't place any value on what you need, neither will you BF, FH, F.

I'm sure you're deeply hurt and confused by his refusal to make any kind of compromise with you. That's a painful fact of life when it comes to alot of us on here regarding overindulgent spouses and our relationship with them.

I honestly think you're making the right decision here, but only you know for certain. You gotta do what you gotta do, as the saying goes.

I can tell you that if I had known the true dynamics between H and SD17, I would never have married him. Somehow I don't think it's going to change when she gets older, either. I will promise you that should she end up getting pregnant and go crying to her father, I would end up in the very situation you are leaving, but not for long. They would be out of here so fast they wouldn't know what hit them. You only have this life, and it's too sad to spend it being miserable because you love someone and they just don't value you.

You'll be ok. Let yourself grieve a little, then move on with your life.