You are here

The Great Green Garbage Bag

Endora's picture

Going to be an interesting weekend.

Long ago and far away - SS 16-(aka)Zippy, Endora and DH sat down and had a family meeting to discuss a few house rules when we bought our "together house".

These 5 rules were discussed and agreed upon.

Rules:

Homework
Bed time
Hygiene
Cleanup
1 household chore

(as you can see I am quite a Task Master)

The only clean-up rule Zippy has is to pick up his dirty dishes, bottles, cans and candy wrappers (daily)) when he comes up from playing 24/7 videofest-and the above applies to his room (which is a pigsty waiting to be fumigated when and IF SS EVER moves out-cannot touch "HISNESSE'S" Room now can we?).

In the two years we have lived in the house, DH is a broken record of "Please "Honey", pick up your stuff downstairs and in your room" and when Zip does manage to pick up ONE thing and bring it up-you can only imagine the Brass Band of congratulatory praise heaped upon the Zipster(sound familiar Crayon?).

-Zip manages to do this horrid back breaking rule- half -assed at that- once a week-I let it go (pick your battles right)?

Yesterday, unbeknownst (is this a word? sp) to me

DH asked Zip to get rid on ONE of his Rockband boxes (huge boxes within boxes-yes there are three of them-cannot get down to the basement because them) downstairs and bring up his dishes, pack for his overnight with his Mom- BEFORE his work shift -

I am happily out shopping with my girlfriend-blissfully unaware of what is to come...

I get a phone call from DH -stating that BM has accepted an overnight visit from Prince Zippy this weekend -so it will be just my girlfriend and I for dinner (DH is a recreational musician-and playing last night)-Zip will come home to pick up his pre-packed bag and head to FruitLoop Palace.

As an aside (this is for you secondwife 19) -Here in the city I live in, there has been a 52 day bus strike-Zip HAS to take public transport to his school as High School students here do not have school buses-soooo dutiful DH has been chauffering Zippy to and from school for 52 days-the one week he needed me too (as he works)-I did it (Fool that I am) BM NEVER offered ONCE to take Zip to school-(she lives 15 minutes away and does not work!)

Dh says to me today and I quote:

"It is going to be Soooo hard on Zippy to take the bus again-he cannot sleep in like he can when I drive him" :sick:

Back to the weekend

My girlfriend and I have a wonderful Zipless evening-I dyed her hair- we had shrimp, wine, chicken wings and tons of laughs-

8:20pm-

Zippy bangs on the door (he has lost his 50th house key)-BM is waiting in her car in the driveway (tap tap tap-she has been known to drive away IF Zip makes her wait too long-YIKES NO NOT TONIGHT I PRAY!!!)..

Zippy proceeds to go up and down the stairs 4 times-(wasn't he supposed to be pre-packed for Mummies house?)-

off he goes FINALLY-yes

Girlfriend has one for the road and heads off home ( to her tastefully decorated kid-free apartment) do I sound resentful?

I start to clean up and have to put something downstairs...

Well you can only imagine what has greeted me

Last weeks dishes-remains from a project-Zippy uses the basement floor as his personal garbage can for wrappers, MickeyD's bags-you name it! AND he has emptied the RockBand refrigerater sized boxes upon boxes all over the basement-

Keep in mind ALL of his video game equipment is emeshed in all this garbage-

My face is purple by now -and calmly I pour a glass of wine and add some club soda, two ice cubes and a slice of lemon-

Proceed to put on some Spa music

Go to the garage

Get a Hefty Bag

and put the whole damn thing I found downstairs into the above "Hefty" bag

Dishes, garbage, controllers, headset, drumsticks, whatever I found laying around....

DH walks in after the gig

I calmly take him downstairs-show him the inside of the garbage bag (he knows not to mess with me now!)

He looks at me like I shot him in the chest-took his heart out and beat him with it-

Oh "Honey" (same endearment term as Zippy gets- :sick: )-

Martyr that he is

"Zippy is going to be SO pissed when he gets home! You put the DISHES he left downstairs all this week in with all of HIS video game controllers :O !- "Honey" I will tell Zippy I DID THIS (what to save me frome the wrath of an entitled 16 year old uninvited, irritating house guest-that isn't about to leave until he is 40!) Give me a break!

Stay tuned FOR-

THE WRATH OF ZIPPY

Great!

Comments

sparky's picture

Good For You. I support you 100%. When my SD was living with me I told her when this place starts swarming in bugs she would have to pay the bill for the exterminator.

BMJen's picture

story telling lessons from Crayon. Because that was the most entertaining thing I've heard all day!

I can't wait for part 2.

stepmom2one's picture

I told her anything that I found out on the floor went into the garabage. If she wanted it she could pick it out of there. I only had to throw a couple of things away till she got the point. But then again it will only work if your H backs you up.
I guess I don't see that happening anytime soon Sad

ferretmom's picture

I had to do that with sd right after H and I got married. We were packing up his house to move into something larger and sd refused to clean or pack her room. We ended up having to do it and I filled 8 large lawn bags with trash and broken toys. When we told her to finish she refused until I started throwing more things away. H didn't agree with me at first but when he picked up a pile of moldy towels and hundreds of roaches ran out he changed his mind. Before I let them bring anything from her room into the new house all her clothes and bedding had to go to a laundromat and everything else cleaned in the yard. I still ended up setting off bug bombs in the new house just to be safe.

Most Evil's picture

I confess to being so cheap I might hide anything that Dh will insist on replacing, controllers, etc., just to not pay for it again - but do applaud your effort and hope it does some good Smile

"A lie told often enough becomes the truth." - Vladimir Lenin

Endora's picture

That kid was not happy -and if looks could kill I would have had an axe through my head last night!

Zip glowered at me whenever he came up and loudly washed dishes (I wanted to take a picture of that-but DH is such a party pooper when it comes to that sort of thing!)

Of course he knew it was me re the garbage bag because Daddy would NEVER do such a thing.

Step Parenting – you might need to step back before you step in something!

Sita Tara's picture

I was torn between being angry on your behalf with all you wrote...

And thoroughly enjoying HOW you wrote it.

We really must exchange some ideas for blended tales of woe!

This is my favorite-

"...and calmly I pour a glass of wine and add some club soda, two ice cubes and a slice of lemon-
Proceed to put on some Spa music...Go to the garage...Get a Hefty Bag...and put the whole damn thing I found downstairs into the above "Hefty" bag...Dishes, garbage, controllers, headset, drumsticks, whatever I found laying around....DH walks in after the gig-"

I was tempted to allow myself to determine that the "GIG" Dh walked in after, was how you were describing the previous events- you- wine- club soda-ice cubes-lemon-garage-hefty bag...ETC!

I felt like I was reading something in a book!

"Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra

Rags's picture

sort it out when he gets home. Inform him that, his space or not, it is your home and he will either respect it or not have any belongings in it.

Way to go Endora!

Eventually DH and Zippy will learn accountability.

Best regards,