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D.rainwater89's picture

So, I'm a newish step-Dad. His mom and me got back together about 10 months ago and moved in together back in november. Our 7 year old is at that age where every little thing is back talk or "No'. Normally I can just deal with it. However, his mom works nights at the hospitals corona unit(more stress right?). I've been home.. with him... every day... for this past week. Shes worked 6 out of the past 7 days. I am sooo aggrivted with him. Every little thing he back talks. I finally flipped out on him today on our family walk. Today he asked for a cheese omlette for breakfast. Made it for him no problem. Bam done. He proceeds to not eat it. Hour later he eats a pop-tart... We had to do his school work today. Had to legitimately ask him 17 times to sit in his chair and focus.(Yesterday we were at it for 6 hours, when it should have taken us 2 hours). I ask him to clean up his room. "No." Is what I get in return. Legitimately told him to get a bath. "No." "No." "No" is what I keep getting. Finally got him to go do it. I hear the bath running upstairs(about 6:30pm) and start waking his mom up. He comes downstairs about 40 minutes later IN THE SAME CLOTHES!! He literally ran a both and didn't use it. I tell him to go back up and get it and his mom undermines me and tells me its fine "were going on a walk." Then she tells him he needs to put on sweatpants, because, its still cold here. "No." She gives in. She comprimises by getting him to wear a hoody.... We start walking outside and he's all over the place. She tells him repeatedly to zip up his jackey. (He had it off his shoulders and around his forearms). He ignored it. She said something again. He said "No." I lost it and hollered at him to put on his f*****g jacket. He had the nerve to say "It is on." as he's playing with it behind him. Made me soo angry. Later during the walk, he said I was being a "meenie". I didn't yell, but I said in my strongest Dad voice that I wasn't being mean but that I was aggrivated; because, he is not listening and has been bad all day. His mom starts like defending him like i'm being too hard on him. Like don't say that sh*t, when you haven't been here all week! Then just now as I'm writing this. She made him corndogs after I told him he couldn't have anything; because, he did'nt eat his dinner ealier. 


I'm soo aggrivated right now. I don't know if it's just being on lockdown for this corona craziness or what, but I'm losing my crap right now. I usually have a pretty good tolerance for this kind of stuff but it is all day EVERY SINGLE DAY from the moment I wake up until the moment I go to bed. I can't even get away from him then; because, she lets him sleep in the bed. (she doesn't want him to feel like hes being kicked out of the bed for me.) What makes it all worse is that I can't even talk to my girlfriend about all this. She turns on her blinders as soon as it comes to her son. If i say anything about it, then i don't love him. If I reprimand him, then i'm an a**h**e. 


Any vet step-parents out there with some advice?


SteppedOut's picture

My advice? Run dude. 

This will never get better. It will get worse. 

advice.only2's picture

So if this is YOUR child step up and parent!  Lay down the law and make this kid behave...unless this isnt your child and you are just a babysitter with no real authority because MOMMEE and DADEE don't make this kid behave.  In that case either demand your pay for services rendered or acknowledge that your spouse is a sh*t parent who lets her kid walk all over her and she needs to find a nanny for her spawn and not use you to raise her kid. 

Stepmamajess's picture

It’s not going to get better. Do yourself and everyone a favor and leave now. 

DHsfamilyfromhell's picture

Pick your battles wisely or you are going to get even more stressed which you do not currently need. 

Maybe the back chat does need some kind of plan but best to tackle things in bite size chunks whilst your partner is working and you don’t have full back up. 

Unless you have a food shortage or self isolating, then overlook a pop tart or two.  Could you put some stuff in a cupboard he can’t get to, and give him access to some ‘acceptable stuff’. Some kids do fall into the little and often category. Some kids struggle with a no snacks between meals policy. 

Quite honestly, if he’s out on a walk he will soon learn to zip up his own coat when he is cold. 

justmakingthebest's picture

That was my question!

Sounds like he needs to be spending more time at Dad's house. You are NOT the babysitter. 

D.rainwater89's picture

hes long out of the picture. Legit abandoned his child and can't even call on his birthday or christmas. No child support natta.

D.rainwater89's picture

wow lol i really didn't expect to get all this feedback. I was super frustrated last night. I think I am going to try to disengage from the situation like the one person said and see how that goes. I really do not want to leave. I do love them and they are my family. Change is going to come one way or another.