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DH continues to enable assholes

DaizyDuke's picture

DH told me last Wednesday night that he was going to pick up SD20 where she is staying at a friends while "home" for the summer so she could go turkey hunting with him the next morning.  He said she would be sleeping on the bed in his hunting room in the basement.  I wasn't happy about it, but told him whatever, she just better not touch anything of mine while at the house. Off he went to get her around 10 pm.  I went to bed.  I leave to go to work the next morning, and DH is not hunting.  I asked him what was up?  He said he went out, but had a headache and came back home.  Later in the day he told me that after he got SD all the way to our house (about a 40 minute round trip) she realized that she didn't bring her hunting lisence with her.  What the actual fuck????  The whole fucking reason she was supposedly coming was to go hunting, so how could she "forget" her lisence???  So DH drove all the back to friends house and got it for her.  WTF again??  Then he tells me he didn't even bother waking her up to go hunting???? And then in the next breath started asking me about giving her our extra car.   Apparently she was whining to DH that she really needs a car to drive, because when she has a day off, but her friend has to work, she is just sooooo bored and can't go anywhere.  Whatever.  So THAT was obviosuly the ulterior motive to her coming to go "hunting"  They worked on getting her insurance (I refused to put her on our policy and refused to let her drive our car around like last summer without being on SOMEONE's policy) They went to the DMV, got everything transferred to her and off she went.  DH told me that he told her she needs to thank me since I owned half of that car and helped put money into repairs for it over the years.  Of course I've heard not a fucking peep.  She has no problem sending me nasty messages, but her entitled, spoiled, asshole self can't say "thank you". 

So last night, DH tells me around 9 pm, that he has to run to SD's friend's house (again 40 minute round trip) to give her a gun because she was going to hunting with some old timer at the sporting good store she works at in the morning. I said whatever and went to bed.  This morning when I was getting ready to leave for work, I heard DH's phone going off and realized that he left it at the house.  BS8 looked at it and said it was SD and it was like the 5th time she'd called.  So I looked thinking maybe there was some emergency??  Oh no, just fucking SD "emergency" nonsense.... Come to find out  by reading through the text messages, AFTER DH went and dropped of the stupid gun for her last night, she text him and said that she must have left her hunting lisence in his car and she was going to need it for morning.  I'm guessing from the messages that he ran back out at 1 a.m. to get it to her.  WTF????  Then apparently the old timer who was supposedly taking her never called (probably because he never said he would take her, she just assumed or some such SD nonsense) Her last message to DH was that she was "coming up to the house"  I made certain before I left that every door was locked, every window was closed, and that there was no spare key outside.  Oh and I also hid the towels in the main bathroom in case DH comes home and she ends up staying during the day.  Last time she was there she dirtied 3 fucking towels.. that of course I had to hunt down and wash. I know DH was up the road hunting with a friend of ours and I hoping he didn't come home anytime soon. 

I seriously couldn't dislike SD more than I do.  I don't understand why DH keeps enabling her nonense.  I know I shouldn't care because it really doesn't affect me, but it's just irritating, especially when DH bitches at BS8 about 2 pairs of shoes by the door not being placed perfectly on the rack.    GRRRRR 

Comments

thinkthrice's picture

In your case, the car, the repairs, the time lost with DH, putting the house into lockdown.  Things never change do they?  I thank my lucky stars every day that the 3 skids PASed out.  I know that sounds horrid, but I can only IMAGINE the shenanigans they'd be up to (OSS21, SD19, YSS15)

Daizy, I feel for you!!!!!!

StepUltimate's picture

Good for you for stsying out of it & letting DH be Errand Boy. Can't blame you!

Sweet T's picture

Wow, some people never learn. I would be ashamed if my child ever acted like that to.me or anyone else.

 

Myss.Tique D'Off's picture

I can understand that you are very irritated by this whole situation.
Your DH allows himself be used by SD - boggles the mind that he isn't tired of running up and down after her carelessness and ungrateful attitude.
(Pretty much the same situation with my STBXH and his precious daughter.)

 

DaizyDuke's picture

Oh and I left out the part where DH was JUST complaining last week that SD20 should not be in college because she is too immature and she should have listened to him and got a job... but it was ALLLLL Aunt J fault for pushing her to go to college.  I said the hell it was!  SD INSISTED she was going to college, because she wanted to follow her boyfriend.... NO other reason.  DH couldn't dispute that, so then said that Aunt J shouldn't have "enabled" her by filling out all the applications, student aid and student loan forms for her.  This coming from the Enabling KING himself!!  lmao. 

DaizyDuke's picture

Bingo! You are a winner!!!  DH said the registration and plates were $150.00 and he (WE) paid that for her and told her that is her birthday present (her bday is in July) how convenient of course! Oh and WE paid for an oil change, and to get the passenger seat fixed the week prior to handing it over to the entitled ungrateful snot

barbKarin's picture

I am sure he will be giving her money to help with insurance as well. I know how this story goes.

DaizyDuke's picture

He said he told her, he is out.  That we gave her a car and so he is not sending her $150.00 a month any more and if repairs are needed on that car that SHE is responsible as that is part of the responsibility of owning a car.  I told him he's full of shit.  That the first time she calls and whines about how something is wrong and it's going to cost $300.00 to get it fixed and she doesn't have any money that DH will feel guilty and he'll pay the bill.  Guar-an-fucking-teed.  He disagrees.. but I know better.  Mark my words.

Well she neeeeeeeds it to get to work, well she neeeeeeeds it to get to school, well she neeeeeeeds it for her busy social life, well she neeeeeeeds it to impress her potential boyfriends.... blah blah blah

 

barbKarin's picture

Exactly. These fathers are so full of guilt they will never stay true to their word. I'm glad you expect it at least. It'll sting less when he eventually caves.

Survivingstephell's picture

You might as well file for CS, that way you can be sure he takes care of BS.  Wouldn't that be funny?  Him getting served papers while he is still living there! Shit, I might do it just to prove a point.  If he won't give you the financial loyality you deserve, then you will force him too.   I know you can provide for BS on you own, but what will it take to get thru that thick head of his??!!!   If you only knew.....

DaizyDuke's picture

OMG just talked to DH.  So aparently last night he told her to meet him at a gas station.  He got there and waited 30 minutes, texted and called SD and no response.  He then told her to meet him at a Kmart Plaza because he had a terrible headache and wanted to go to Dunkin and get some caffeine.  No response, no SD.  So he goes back to the gas station and she's there.  Ohhhhh she couldn't find her charger so her phone was dead. ( of course when she wants something like this morning, she has no problem having her phone charged and in working order!)  Then she apparently fucked something up with the steering wheel of the car already and DH said you could hardly get the key in to turn it, so he messed with it for a bit and then told her to just come out to the house so he could try and fix it there.  So he is following her down a 2 lane State road and is like what the heck is wrong with her headlights.. so gets her to pull over....  and she's driving around with the fucking parking lights on.  DH was like WTF????  She said oh she didn't realize, because the high beam light was coming on, she just assumed the regular lights were on.  DH chewed her ass, told her she was going to kill someone or herself and that he just needed to be away from her right then. 

He said this morning, he was coming back from hunting with his friend and there she's sitting in the church parking lot up the road from our house.  DH was like WTF are you doing?  She tells him that old timer never called her and they didn't exchange numbers so she couldn't call him.  DH was like I drove around and went through all of that last night and you didn't even have a fucking plan??  What was your plan now???  She said she was just  going to drive around and try and find DH and maybe track him down in the woods or just go out by herself.  LMAO! 

She is a fucking psycho lunatic.  He said he told her he's been doing this shit with her since she was like 8 and he's really dang sick and tired of it..... BUT, ladies, we all know NOTHING will change... UGH! 

oneoffour's picture

At her age my great grandfather had moved from Yorkshire to London and learned a trade then got on a boat and went to the OTHER SIDE OF THE WORLD to start his adult life. I bet he knew how to turn on the lights too.