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OT- Wedding is coming up and I'm freaking out

collinanderson's picture

 STBDH and I  are getting married on April 3rd. He's the love of my life. OSS is such a dream. YSS  is still acting up but his dad  parents his kids properly and doesn't tolerate any form of disrespect. He loves me and puts me above everyone else and I him. 

Latetly I've developed a form of uneasiness. I don't know why though. I don't love him any less. We have no problems. So I don't know why I'm feeling like this and it's frustrating. I don't want him to think I don't want to get married because I do. I really do. Just the closer we get to the date, the more nervous I feel. Normally I  can feely speak to him about how I'm feeling and he's very receptive. Just I can't bring myself to tell him about this. The last thing I want to do is hurt him. I disclosed how I was feeling to a close friend and when she asked me "why" I couldn't give her a solid answer. There are no problems at all. 

Lately the both of us have been caught up in work. So I asked him if we could spend some quality time together and within 24 hours he booked  this weekend off. 

This is eating away at me. 


Monkeysee's picture

This is totally normal with your wedding so near. I’ve always been scared of marriage & the day after I married DH I had a slight panic attack at what I’d just done. I asked myself if it was because I married DH specifically or if I’d have this reaction regardless of who I’d wed.

I realized it was just my fear of being legally bound to someone, and not that there was anything bothering me about being married to DH. It calmed me down to think of it that way.

Marriage is a big deal, so you’re bound to be nervous! Focus on all the reasons you’re doing this & check in to make sure you’re doing it for the right reasons. It’s probably just a case of cold feet. You’ll be fine, enjoy your big day! 

elkclan's picture

Normal. But not to be dismissed. You can google up some tools for making a big decision. Like the pros and cons list. It seems silly but it's just a framework for helping you work through your thoughts. 

I wish I'd listened to my nerves with my ex. 

On the other hand, people with happy lifelong marriages have also felt this way right before the day.

StepUltimate's picture

Anxiety sucks! I hate to hear it's earing away at you. I'm glad you spoke to a friend about it and blogged here about it, and agree that a Pro/Con list might help clarify what the anxiety is about (beyond the general HOLY SH*T I'm getting MARRIED anxiety others here have mentiined). 

I appreciate your situation as I'm typically an anxious person. Exercise, writing, talking with friends, and reading are the tools I use to keep the anxiety in check. Writing helps me narrow it down to what's really bothering me. Friends provide me with valuable feedback and encouragement.

Hope you have a serene, peaceful day today. Happy FRIDAY!!