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Turns out it was number 4.

CLove's picture

Submitted by CLove on Thu, 06/01/2023 - 10:31am

"4. Its her birthday weekend and shes hoping for some presents on our side (Dad, Me, My Parents, Dads family) and that means money to buy things..."

So shes back to staying in Beach Town with Toxic Troll. After she got her cash grab, we arent going to see her. 

We did have a little sushi dinner at home, and thats pretty much it. She came out for brief interludes the one day, but couldnt really decide what she wanted to do for her bday and when she was supposed to be with us on bday day, her mother "cooked her a bday dinner" so she just stayed.

I figured. And the small amount of contact we did have, was disappointing. Shes not really mving forward with any kind of permit or license and she looks pretty dirty.

Of course Fakebook memories popped up of the different things I had organised previously for earlier bdays. I just sent them on to husband, who was disappointed, and told him "at least we have these precious memories to hold on to..."

 

Comments

Stepdrama2020's picture

Submitted by Stepdrama2020 on Thu, 06/01/2023 - 10:40am

Clove at least you called it, you knew there were ulterior motives.

Arent you glad you didnt go out of your way for the selfish SD's bday?!

Relish in the fact that your gut knew, a bittersweet relish even so.

Keep up the disengagement .

CLove's picture

Submitted by CLove on Thu, 06/01/2023 - 11:04am

There were lots of opportunities to do fun things together - including a big festival that was kid friendly. That would have been a great bonding (I have $$ from sale of a car), and if her heart was in the right place I would have split it with husband. 

But you are right. Ca$h Grab and Go!

CLove's picture

Submitted by CLove on Thu, 06/01/2023 - 11:33am

When I gave her ca$h I got a musical instrument out of it. Practicing on strumming...

justmakingthebest's picture

Submitted by justmakingthebest on Thu, 06/01/2023 - 11:48am

Man... I was really hoping that it was to keep the relationship going, even if "less". I'm sorry. I know this hurts both of you.

CLove's picture

Submitted by CLove on Thu, 06/01/2023 - 11:53am

I guess as long as Toxic Troll has the Beach Town, all bets are off.

Im on my 12 month countdown...

thinkthrice's picture

Submitted by thinkthrice on Thu, 06/01/2023 - 1:35pm

When skids show their true colors and allegiance to their toxic BMs then subsequently PAS out, the peace that ensues is fantastic.

CLove's picture

Submitted by CLove on Thu, 06/01/2023 - 1:49pm

Its weird because she feels safe enough to criticise her mother with me...lol. And now I just am like "well everything has a price and beach towns price was no job for you!"

thinkthrice's picture

Submitted by thinkthrice on Thu, 06/01/2023 - 7:50pm

Make the faux pas of criticizing the HCGUBM yourself.   Powersulk will get on her hind legs over that one. 

And this is why gov't housing programs get such a bad rap.  Totally squashes an individual's ambition to better oneself. 

Ispofacto's picture

Submitted by Ispofacto on Thu, 06/01/2023 - 12:06pm

I hope you have a receipt for the purchase of that uke. Otherwise you are cheating her out of ghost money she never received and the uke is still hers.

 

missgingersnap2021's picture

Submitted by missgingersnap2021 on Thu, 06/01/2023 - 12:15pm

The first few years I was dating DH I planned such nice bday parties for SD. And I did a lot for her graduation party too. (Well as much as I could since DH wanted it small and simple). The sad thing is at the end of the day I dont think SD will ever appreciate it. But DH did so I just tell myself I did it for him. 

thinkthrice's picture

Submitted by thinkthrice on Thu, 06/01/2023 - 1:37pm

I clearly remember baking a bday cake in the shape of a train for OSS. All for naught. 

MissK03's picture

Submitted by MissK03 on Thu, 06/01/2023 - 4:14pm

Since you guys (you and your DH) seem to be caught up on the magic number of 18. In one year... Tell her how you REALLY feel, point out the toxic mess, point out situations (reference your blogs) and lay it all out. See how everything falls after that.

CLove's picture

Submitted by CLove on Thu, 06/01/2023 - 4:19pm

It will be a moot point and my caring level will be at almost zero, I predict. But thanks.

Rags's picture

Submitted by Rags on Sun, 06/04/2023 - 5:52pm

really no longer matters.

Enjoy marking off the days until..... she is fully immersed in the TT/FF cesspool of life and ... you and DH can move to your own beach home, and live your life together sans any presence of TT's shallow and polluted gene pool.

My condolences to you and DH on how this is all transpiring.  But... at some point kids either choose to embrace a quality life or.... fully engage in perpetrating the baggage they inherrit from a parent... like TT.

Either way, not your problem.

Take care of  you.