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SS still wants to freeload

Cheyenne's picture

DH talked to ss25 ex-girlfriend today. She said they are trying to work it out still and they would have a better relationship if they did not live together. Sorry I am not helping your relationship by ruining mine.

Ex-girlfriend said he could just live with her for a few months until he buys a house, Which he can't do yet because he doesn't have a deposit together. But SS doesn't want to. He asks DH if he can live with DH's
Mother!! So I guess he will mooch off her for a while if she agrees, which I hope she doesn't. She is a clean freak. She wipes the water of the glass in the shower when she gets out. No black shoes in the house. Just white soles, of course make the bed etc... He will hate that. He doesn't even shower after working all day in construction and then goes straight to bed. His room sticks. I am now counting the days until he is gone in 6 days.

Comments

twoviewpoints's picture

IMHO I think your DH should have told SS he could not ask his grandmother. I seriously hope GMA tells the grandson 'NO, not just no but hell no'.

I'm sorry the SS is having relationship troubles, but he's 25 years old. He isn't a little boy anymore and just because he believes renting a place is a waste of money is no one else's problem but his own. He can rent a month by month efficiency apartment (dinky little room and a bath...that's all he needs anyway). If he has too much personal belongs to fit that he can rent a storage unit for his excess things.

Letting him run and ask GMA to help him out for no reason but that it's not to his liking to have to rent is a infringement on his grandmother. She may say 'yes' because she'll feel pressured to help the turd or SS may tell her some wild tale about going to be homeless *boo-hoo-hoo*. Your DH needs to call his mother and tell her she is under no obligation to house DH's grown selfish idiot of a son. SS's reasoning to want to freeload off of others is no a sufficient necessity to be doing so. The SS can either rent a place and delay purchasing an actual house (due to shortage of deposit) or he can live on the street corner. What's going on with SS is his own choice. Let him be homeless. You can pretty well bet that rental option looks real good after a week of the streets.

And yes, I am a grandmother, and no your SS would not get in my door for this selfish reason.

furkidsforme's picture

I agree. This could also start a family war.

And your DH should not be going behind SS back like he's a child and talking to the girlfriend. SS is 25 fucking years old for god's sake! He's a MAN. Your DH should be communicating with him LIKE A MAN.... not trying to talk to the ex.

No wonder the guy is 25 and won't launch!

Cheyenne's picture

I discussed with DH the responses to my SS moving in with his grandma. DH says I just want SS to buy a house instead of rent. Our parents let us live at home until we saved up for a deposit for a house. Yes my parents did that but I had never moved out and was working full time. I was also much younger, I started full time work when I was18 and moved out when we got married at 21. DH had SS when he was 19 and he only briefly moved out with bm and SS when SS was born. He only moved out for 6 months max until they broke up. DH's parents were still together and they let DH move back in.

SS left home at 18 and has not worked full time until he moved in with us in October. So he is 26 in 2 weeks, so has been out of home for 8 years. He lived with his mothers mum for a year until she kicked him out for not giving her money. His excuse for not giving her board was because she would spend it all on beer! At least she had a house and fed him!!! He can't live with his mother because he hates her, she's on heroin and is lives in a homeless shelter with his 2 siblings. She had a baby 6 months ago, so total of 5 kids with 5 different fathers. She is 44 now so hopefully that's the last.