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Grasping for anything to use as a weapon, sd is pathetic.

momagainfor4's picture

Last night, dh decided to NOT text wth sd15 but actually called her and had a verbal convo.
The list of reasons that sd doesn't or can't or won't come to visit at our house included the following:

I don't feel comfortable there
I don't feel like that's my home
I don't like your house
I don't like the things you do at your house
It's boring
I don't like momagain
I don't like momagain's family
I don't feel comfortable around them
I don't know them
Momagain makes me feels uncomfortable
Momagain is the woman of the house, it's her house now
I'm busy
I don't like missing my stuff at home

There is so much more but I can't think of all the ridiculousness!!!
Just too much.
All this crap, which is supposed to involve me and my family is a joke. I've only been around her a handful of times since last xmas. And she's not been around my family for quite awhile. So the jealousy about her dad and my family is pretty funny.
He tried to talk to her about it but he comes across seeming like he's commiserating with her about having to spend time with MY family.
I told him.. go, go pick up your kid on a day that's totally inconvenienent that you've already made plans. No biggie but don't come back here. Go spend the weekend at your dad's. I can't deal with her drama on top of my own daughter's wedding drama and then my finals on top of ALL that crap.
It's just not a good time. I never put my foot down but this time, I really am sick of being used as an excuse for someone's childish behavior. I know that the kid didn't come up with all this on her own. She's spouting all the crap that she's heard her mom say bc my dh basically told me that bm pretty much said the same thing to him during a phone convo the other day.

I'm not the flavor of the month or anything. We've been together for 5 1/2 years. this isn't some fly by one night stand kinda thing. We are in this for the long haul.
Bm was only with dh for about 8 months, got pregnant, they tried to make it work.. it didn't then by the time sd was born she had moved 2 hours away. So he's never been in a real relationship with this kids mom.
I think that it is the jealousy of all that lack of that has really got bm in a tizzy and she's created this alternate reality for sd.

Funny bc when sd comes here, if she does ever, she'll act like everything is just peachy. It's not peachy. You can't say crap like that and expect no one to say anything back to you.
I'm going to confront her about the things she said and the stuff she said to her dad. And I'm going to explain that while we would love to be a part of her life, we can't CHANGE our entire life to do that. People have to be flexible but NO ONE is going to change who and what they are to accommodate you and no one should. If they do then they aren't worth having..it's called fake.

Comments

B22S22's picture

>>>Momagain is the woman of the house, it's her house now<<<

that's an interesting statement right there.

DaizyDuke's picture

I don't feel comfortable there
I don't feel like that's my home
I don't like your house
I don't like the things you do at your house
It's boring
I don't like momagain
I don't like momagain's family
I don't feel comfortable around them
I don't know them
Momagain makes me feels uncomfortable
Momagain is the woman of the house, it's her house now
I'm busy
I don't like missing my stuff at home

So basically all of this adds up to IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT.

positivelyfourthstreet's picture

I don't feel comfortable means everybody's onto me and I don't want to have to face it

blending2012's picture

Boy can I relate! My oldest SD says she doesn't like our house b/c there are "too many kids there". Um, there are THREE of you (my husband's kids) and only TWO of my kids. So it's my fault for having.... 2 kids.

Makes me crazy because this SD looooovvvvessss her step-DAD. BM married the guy she cheated on my husband with and he is SO AWESOME because he doesn't have kids of his own. Wish she knew that the reason she even has two homes is because of that bastard.