See a therapist - on your own. Spend time on your own, think about it, take some time. It's your choice, you have to live with it. I went to therapy (only time in my life) because I was so unhappy as a result of DH's baggage. Prob would have left him if he hadn't proposed - was making plans to leave. Still don't know if it was best decision for me. You will have to live every second of your life with baggage attached - just stating the truth. Take a trip, do something on your own, think about what you want in 5-10 years. I will NOT tell you what I think you should do. It sucks, it really, really sucks to be in this position but this is when you need to think of YOU and ONLY YOU. Maybe it's worth the frustration, maybe you can deal, maybe you should leave. Shittiest thing ever is you are the ONLY one to decide. Been there, everyone's different, hope you can be happy.
Been there. And I agree with above poster- see a therapist and take time to yourself. I moved out when I was in that position and stayed with my brother and his wife for a couple months. Exactly what DH needed- a wake up call. He proposed, and just like above poster, still don't know if it was the best decision for my life. Looking back of course....
I tried counseling,I have pretty much completely checked out and now i am saving money to leave hopefully in 6 months. I am going to stay w my mom for a month to really evaluate how i feel without bf. I've become someone i dislike very much,i used to love life now i just get thru the day. It's not healthy to feel like this. I say go with your gut, if i had i would have been gone a couple years ago. Best of luck to you!
I've asked myself this very question...a lot over the last year.
Every one told me you knew what you were getting into...but no I didn't.
Don't get me wrong, I know that my children are not perfect little angels. I know their faults, but they are respectful, they listen, they do not destroy things or tell their BF lies just to start fights. His children are completely different from mine. Entitled, spoiled, manipulative, violent little brats.
I can really only stand to be around one of them.
My children and I are always unhappy when they come over. DH and I have split up because of them before. I am now in therapy because of this as well. It helps, we are also seeking couples therapy for this too. It seems like a lot to ask. I love my DH, he makes me happy...until his kids are over.
I think most of us, if not have asked ourselves "Is it worth it?" I'm still working on the answer myself. I hope you can figure it out too. Best of luck to you on what ever you decide.
I was miserable for years in my marriage and stuck it out, because, isn't it the right thing to do? I finally called it quits at a pivotal moment when I found out ExH had been taking pics of me while I slept. This was not the worst thing he'd ever done (there is a long list) but it was the cherry on top. But mostly, I was physically responding with poor health to all the stress. I also recently broke off a relationship where I always had a knot in my stomach. If your health is declining, it's time to get out. Toxicity takes years off of your life, and it's just not worth it. Holding on and waiting for someone to change is just not worth it.
See a therapist - on your
See a therapist - on your own. Spend time on your own, think about it, take some time. It's your choice, you have to live with it. I went to therapy (only time in my life) because I was so unhappy as a result of DH's baggage. Prob would have left him if he hadn't proposed - was making plans to leave. Still don't know if it was best decision for me. You will have to live every second of your life with baggage attached - just stating the truth. Take a trip, do something on your own, think about what you want in 5-10 years. I will NOT tell you what I think you should do. It sucks, it really, really sucks to be in this position but this is when you need to think of YOU and ONLY YOU. Maybe it's worth the frustration, maybe you can deal, maybe you should leave. Shittiest thing ever is you are the ONLY one to decide. Been there, everyone's different, hope you can be happy.
Been there. And I agree with
Been there. And I agree with above poster- see a therapist and take time to yourself. I moved out when I was in that position and stayed with my brother and his wife for a couple months. Exactly what DH needed- a wake up call. He proposed, and just like above poster, still don't know if it was the best decision for my life. Looking back of course....
I tried counseling,I have
I tried counseling,I have pretty much completely checked out and now i am saving money to leave hopefully in 6 months. I am going to stay w my mom for a month to really evaluate how i feel without bf. I've become someone i dislike very much,i used to love life now i just get thru the day. It's not healthy to feel like this. I say go with your gut, if i had i would have been gone a couple years ago. Best of luck to you!
I've asked myself this very
I've asked myself this very question...a lot over the last year.
Every one told me you knew what you were getting into...but no I didn't.
Don't get me wrong, I know that my children are not perfect little angels. I know their faults, but they are respectful, they listen, they do not destroy things or tell their BF lies just to start fights. His children are completely different from mine. Entitled, spoiled, manipulative, violent little brats.
I can really only stand to be around one of them.
My children and I are always unhappy when they come over. DH and I have split up because of them before. I am now in therapy because of this as well. It helps, we are also seeking couples therapy for this too. It seems like a lot to ask. I love my DH, he makes me happy...until his kids are over.
I think most of us, if not have asked ourselves "Is it worth it?" I'm still working on the answer myself. I hope you can figure it out too. Best of luck to you on what ever you decide.
I was miserable for years in
I was miserable for years in my marriage and stuck it out, because, isn't it the right thing to do? I finally called it quits at a pivotal moment when I found out ExH had been taking pics of me while I slept. This was not the worst thing he'd ever done (there is a long list) but it was the cherry on top. But mostly, I was physically responding with poor health to all the stress. I also recently broke off a relationship where I always had a knot in my stomach. If your health is declining, it's time to get out. Toxicity takes years off of your life, and it's just not worth it. Holding on and waiting for someone to change is just not worth it.