You are here

My SD8 gives me attitude and mini wife syndrome

Megsixo's picture

WARNING - This will be triggering to some.

So I have a 8 year old step daughter and she makes me so mad and pissed at her. I try my best to be a loving and strict parent for her to thrive and learn responsibilities. She recently been a real brat and deceptive lately towards everyone. She's been sick with a flu and slept a lot. We made sure she's well fed and drink lots. She complains whines and carries on for attention. Recently SO asked her yesterday (shes better) to help cleaning house. He literally had to lay down the law to get her to do anything. I had to remind her to do what her dad asked she threw a freakin fit at whined and had a temper tantrums galore. I 

 

She gets her way. He let's her get away with everything. Yes I'm pregnant and hormonal but I'm getting really really angry with her and fed the hell up with her. She gets away with so much stuff that even my bio daughters doesn't get away with have the stuff she does. Im growing hate towards her and major resentment. She will NOT listen to any of us and SO let's her get away with it and totally contradicts what he's showing her or letting her learn. 

And she always cuddles into her dad like she owns him. Im so jealous. 

The pregnancy hormones are making it difficult too coping and she is bossy and mean. 

How do I cope??

ESMOD's picture

By insisting that your husband parent his child.  You will do better to disengage.  Either he will be a good parent.. or he won't.. but I would push him to be more present with parenting her.. and not put you in that role

reedle2021's picture

I don't think it's pregnancy hormones.  I'm pretty far from pregnant and simply reading your post about your SD thoroughly p*ssed me off for you.  I could NOT deal with that kind of behavior. 

Your DH needs to step in and take the lead.  He is the only one who can stop this.  He needs to set some boundaries, expectations, consequences and stick to them.  I worry if he doesn't get her to mind, her behavior will only get worse as she gets older.  I agree with ESMOD - disengage. 

I'm so sorry you are dealing with this. 

Please take care of yourself and keep us posted. 

superlado's picture

Make your husband parent his child.   Make him uncomfortable enough that he does.  Maybe step back from all SD duties until her behavior is better.  You can still be civil and loving just not doing the work.  Take care of yourself and your baby.  Enjoy this special time.  

floralsm's picture

I have a SD8 who is almost PAS'd and a mini wife/attention seeker. Some days I'm reaaaally good and deserve a gold star for my disengagement from her. Today wasn't my best day and my PMS got the better of me. I told her to stop her games, and played right into her little palm. *face palm* 

When I feel that familiar surge of anger and frustration, I breath and walk away and lock myself in the bathroom to calm down. It's the only thing that stops me from going ape sh*t. I hope your DH wakes up and supports you. Without his support there is no way you can get through this long term. Disengage and make her your DH problem. Soon enough, her bad attitude won't be easy for him to defend hopefully. It's not easy, and I wish you all the best with your pregnancy!

Megsixo's picture

She still has some attitude but its like her all over him and kissing him. Like really?! Hes my guy its MY job to kiss and cuddle too! I'm so fed up. I think I will have a convo tomorrow about boundaries 

24 years as a SM's picture

Your DH needs to step up and start parenting his daughter, he's being a lazy parent. Step back from SD any chores that she needs to do, go to your DH and tell him, make him do her chores if he's not willing to make her. Reward your kids for doing their chores and ignore SD.

Megsixo's picture

I've tried and now she's laying on his chest like wtf.... shes controlling and calling him dada. Like seriously 

Megsixo's picture

So now she's texting from SO to HCBM so she could possibly see all my sexual photos to SO this makes me so uncomfortable