CS not agreed on
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I told my DH i was going to put my DD CS away in an account just for her. My DH and i contribute 50/50 to the family pot and I didn't want my DD CS going in there as it is solely for her and he has 4 kids that I help support. He has now threatened to put all of the money he came into he relationship with into a prenuptial agreement if I proceed with putting her money for her aside (our original assets are 50/50 so theres no point) . The point is that there is always a consequence if i spend a dime on her.
We have split yesterday which is a shame. We talked for hours on end and went to counselling and he simply does not understand that her CS should be solely for her at all.
hurting bad........ we have
hurting bad........ we have my DH son full time, 3 girls live with their BMs. I brought in slightly more assets and I bring in more than 50/50 (no that Im worried about that) All my money and assets are into the family pot no probs. He has 2 eXs 2 kids to each and they will always have their BM supporting them. My DD father has nothing to do with her and never will. The CS is all she will ever get from the other bio parent. We (he) pays $1000 month for the girls and they stay every second weekend (minor expense). my DD is very independent and costs little and receives $800 month is CS.
Yeah, just really
Yeah, just really disappointed that my DH that loves me (with a sloppy ay of showing it) would even feel this way on her money. theres always a consequence. the money should all go 5 ways in his mind and its never gonna change no matter what angle I have tried to explain
he even says he's happy for the BMs of his kids to spend their CS on whatever they like. so frustrating and what a sad ending
Is that true that i am
Is that true that i am legally bound to spend the CS on my DD? because that sounds fair to me.
no its not, you're legally
no its not, you're legally obligated to make sure your daughter isn't being abused, so you should feed her and things but beyond absolute basics you can spend the money on whatever you like.
My pay would cover her 120% I
My pay would cover her 120% I just can't see any reason in the world that I cant put that money for her. Anyway sorry for going on about it, Im just going thru a rough time.
I help support his kids 100%
I help support his kids 100% in everyday he has needed for years and years without question
Minor point. If you are
Minor point. If you are already married it's a post nuptial.
If you do a pre or post nuptial be sure that each of you has your own lawyer. You want your lawyer to be looking out for you. Yes, it is more expensive to have two lawyers, but it is worth it.
We did a pre nuptial. We each had our own lawyer. Due to timing of available appointments he met with his lawyer first. When I met with my lawyer, his lawyer had already drafted a proposal for the document and sent it over. My lawyer took one look at it and said - this won't do.
My lawyer protected me (and my kids as their deceased father's assets go to them and no one else)
My thought would be to get your own lawyer. Your kid's assets (CS) are for her, not the family pot.
Good point, guess Im looking
Good point, guess Im looking at separation agreement now
Just out of curiousity, why
Just out of curiousity, why now? Why does DH get his knickers in a knot about it now when youve been with him for years?
He has always had negative
He has always had negative comments to say right at the beginning. Like once he called me at work furious that I put $40 in her bank account and how dare I not talk to him about it first that he wanted to be included. The battle started years ago and I just thought he was being a dickhead and it would stop. Lately its obvious that we have different theories and its clear that her money is just dwindling away. His son has just moved in with us too which has really highlighted what it means to have a dependant child.
Yeah I think he's worried
Yeah I think he's worried that I will spoil her! He has mentioned that he's not comfortable for that money to go towards her car or gas or shoes that aren't a necessity. He says that he really doesn't want me to hand money out to her! So fucken what if I did (which I don't) Im not that kind of mother, I really think its jealousy
He wishes that his kids all
He wishes that his kids all come with $800! well they don't
i feel your pain dtzy. early
i feel your pain dtzy. early in our marriage dh was interrogating me about my money that i made from work. one day i showed him a pair of nice shoes i bought. his reply was: how much did that cost me?
off to the bank i went and made separate accounts. we also have a joint account for joint expenses. no man will tell me how to spend my own money. likewise none of my money will go to the skids or for the loser in laws.