Very new to all this need all the help I can get.
Okay well to start off my bf(boy friend) and i have been together for 2 years and we live together. He was previously married for 7 years and has two children. They aren't his bio children, they are his ex wife's children but he raised one of them since she was one and the son since he was born. So of course he sees them as his kids. Recently his ex wife just started letting my bf see the kids again. He gets them every weekend. I have not met them yet but I would love to. I've brought up wanting to meet them before thinking it wouldn't be an issue since we've been together for quite a bit of time. But all he does is giggle and change the subject? I really want to meet his kids because with me working night shifts and him working day shifts we hardly see each other and on the weekends he spends them with his kids I miss him!! I feel a bit of resentment towards the kids which I know is wrong (don't judge) but I can't help it I understand since he hasn't seen them in months he misses them. This is taking a toll on our relationship because every weekend for the past month he's been with them I hardly see him and he won't let me meet them any tips? Has anyone been through something similar? Any advice will help! This is all brand new to me as we don't have any children of our own and he 'so been my first real boy friend and he has a past that I've never had before I hope I'm not alone and someone out there has been through this before. Not that I would wish this on anyone but i would love some advice from someone who's been through this.
Timing is off ! When it's
Timing is off ! When it's time he will let you know.
Something is up with him and
Something is up with him and BM or another woman. Those are not his kids so there's no reason for him to be involved with them. He's using the kids to cover up what is really going on.
If his story is true, what happens when mom starts dating again or gets married? What man wants to deal with his wife's exhusband hanging around because he can't let go of kids that aren't his????
Well he did raise them from
Well he did raise them from scratch right? Assuming that's true there could easily be a attachment but of course you've got to remain alert.
Google: signs cheating
See if anything else fits. If he's wearing after shave to pick up the kids ya gotta be suspicious. Where is he seeing the kids? All night Saturday? Friday night? Where?
I don't see any reason at all for him not bringing them home.
I don't know if I would jump
I don't know if I would jump to the conclusion that he is cheating on you in anyway, however I would be very suspicious about this woman's intentions. Bottom line, he probably wants to do the right thing and be a father figure to these kids, and she probably wants to cause drama and try to use her children to keep him emotionally invested for whatever reasons she has. In my experience with BM's especially one's that "allow" or "don't allow" men to see children at their own whims and feelings, that's a huge control freak alert.
I would have a real problem with my SO co-parenting children that aren't biologically his, with his ex. I know that to him they are his kids, but I would still have a real problem with it, just me. Now the fact that he won't involve you in it is really telling, will it be a pattern of him putting this woman's wants and children's needs before yours? Is that okay with you?
He picks up his kids and goes
He picks up his kids and goes to his grandmas house. I know for a fact he does cause he will post pics with them on fb and when I call him I could hear the kids in the background. So I don't think he's cheating! And that's what I thought when I brought it up since we've been together for 2 years AND we plan on getting married some days so I though meeting his kids wouldn't be an issue oh and BM hates my guts. I think I will follow him next time he's gone he just got back right now so I can't follow him till next week lol
Why in the world are you
Why in the world are you jumping into step hell with a crazy BM when the kids aren't even his????
If ever there were a time for an ultimatum, this is it.