Feeling isolated
Hi
I relocated 60 miles with my dd to live with my partner. He has his daughter 3 days a week around his shift pattern. I made the mistake of putting my daughter in the same school as since last September had ongoing problems with bm.
She appears to have a psychological need to fabricate problems and illnesses and since we have moved in has taken their daughter to the doctors numerous times, is pushing for an ADHD diagnosis and has put her daughter in a " support group at school" now their daughter is very much together and has none of these problems and seems like a happy 6 year old but this women will do anything to cause stress and contact my partner. I have raised my concerns about this to the doctors and school but no one seems that bothered about the fact that she is using her daughter as a by proxy.
In the meantime this women stares me out on the playground and follows me in her car; not enough to warrant a police investigation. She is very manipulative and all people say is to ignore however it drives me mad.
All this stress makes me miss my friends and family and makes me want to leave. I love my partner but sometimes I think is thus stress worth it.
Had this rubbish my my daughters dad, whom we don't see anymore.
Sounds very much like the BM
Sounds very much like the BM I suffer with.
The latest; SD5 has been rather naughty this past year, BM approached SO in January "our poor wee princess has autism! That's why she's so inconsolable and struggles to follow instructions, poor wee thing, everyone treats her like she's naughty, but she's not" Gah. SO went to all the Dr appt's and assessments to make sure they were getting the WHOLE story about SD's behaviors. ALL Dr's came back saying SD is normal. Thought it was all over.
Couple months later, we see an article in the newspaper all about kids with autism and the struggle their parents face "[BM last name withheld] it is so hard raising a child with autism blah blah blah" f*** me blind, the woman drives me effing crazy and I feel so sorry for SD, she IS naughty and spoiled but instead of having proper rules and boundaries, Mama is treating her with kid gloves. Ugh
Sorry, sharing my story cause crazy the similarities between our BM's (and I moved cities to be with SO and BM hates me).
The way I deal with it. I avoid BM. In the past SO and I wrote a letter to BM stating our boundaries (she replied in a nasty manner, we didn't respond, wasn't our intention to resolve things with her, just letting her know where I stand), since the letter, if i see SD and BM (small town), I'll be warm and kind to SD, chat to her a wee bit, but I will NOT look at BM, I completely ignore her and I don't feel guilty. Other then that, there's not a lot that can be done, if she does step over any lines, act on it quickly, and only other advice I can give, wine, wine helps lol
Thanks for replies. My
Thanks for replies. My partner is going for an assessment with the OCcupational therapist in a couple of weeks so hopefully they will show BM it is parenting. Makes me so angry. Poor little SD. I even questioned munchasen by proxy at some point. Stupid women!!!
I have spoken to my SO but he feels that I asking him to leave his BD behind if we relocate back to the town I'm from. It's a hard one as although I have my DD full time he would have to travel up and just see his BD on weekends as at the moment he has her around his rolling shift pattern so he sometimes takes and collects from school etc.