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What is the members' " life expectancy" on ST? How long do people stay on average?

Pilgrim Soul's picture

Somebody has just responded to a thread from 2011 on Adult Skids forum. Out of curiosity, I took a look at posters' names, and with just 2 exceptions, did not recognize any.

How long do you think most stay on here? I am close to 2 years, i think. Some newbies seem to make an appearance and then disappear as quickly. Some old timers pop in now and then to say hello. I wonder - on average - what is a member's shelf life? How long does it take to learn the lessons? What is a reasonable engagement and when do diminishing returns set in and drive people back into RL?

It is such a fluid community... if you have been on here a long time, how have you seen ST change?

At times it is like a flash mob. Gathering together when the mood strikes, falling apart once the music ends...

missflo's picture

I've been around for about 2 years. I've been a "stepmother" for nearly 3. (We've been together nearly 3 years, only married 4 months Smile
I came when I realized that step life was something I needed help with or at least another perspective on. When I started to see the crazy and manipulation from BM and the SS'S. Roughly around the same time we moved in together and he finally started divorce and property settlement proceedings...coincidence I'm sure Wink
I'd imagine I'll need ST for a long time to come.
I wonder how many people leave here because their marriage or relationships end. Stepping has a pretty high fail rate.

DPW's picture

7 years under different names. I haven't been a stepmother in over 4 years but I still pop in daily to see what's happening... lol

christag's picture

I've been on ST for 4 years and 42 weeks (no idea it had been that long) but I mainly lurk because I get some enjoyment out of reading others bashing their skids because mine are completely estranged but the bane of my existence. I don't post much since when I do, I always get attacked and told that I need to leave my DH - which I admit is probably true but for a variety of reasons I don't.

I've seen a lot of different posters come and go. Many are in bad situations and do end up leaving their relationship. The point in which someone finds the site and decides that this is the place for them means there are a lot of problems. A high percentage of remarriages involving children end up failing.

Orange County Ca's picture

Five and a half although I've taken 3 cross country motor trips lasting 10 months, 5 months and 4 months during which I visited only occasionally.

secondplace's picture

I've been on here for just over four years. I hardly ever post and blog even more rarely, but am on here as lot as a "guest".

It seems there are a lot more "I'm new here" posts than there were a few years ago. Maybe Stalk is just getting more popular, but I can't keep up with the newbies anymore.

I follow some people's stories on a regular basis, and others I barely look at. There's just not enough time to follow everyone's.

She_Sparkles's picture

During the course of my first membership here I stayed for around 2 years almost 3. There was a lot of site drama going on and not a lot of constructive advice being given so I bailed. Then I got divorced. Then I returned bc I still feel it's a good site and who knows,I might be able to help someone feel a bit better about their situation or give them advice on how to cope.

20YearsAsAStep-Mom's picture

2.5 years here, been with DH 23 years. The last 4 years have been the most difficult. Still learning and growing. Feel like I will be here forever LOL.

Rags's picture

6yrs 14wks for me. My STalk participation ebbs and flows. I am far more active now than I was for several years due to living as an Expat. When everyone else is working I have down time to post and read.

counseling.advocate's picture

Over a year, few different names. First one was too personal, included my last name, it was exactly like my email. Then, I didn't like my last name so I changed accounts, but I don't like this either. I'm not so creative am I Wink

derb84123's picture

This is funny, I have been gone from ST for about 5 months and just came back today! I would say I have been a member of SF or Cafemom (used a step group there before I found st) for about 5 years. My usage comes and goes with issues with bm or sks. I recently had a baby, so I checked out from steplife for the most part. It coincided with the kids visiting bm for teh summer too, so I had a relaxing break from the craziness that is steplife

Accordn2L's picture

I got rid of my skid but am still traumatized so I keep coming just because of the awesome people on here and to remind myself that it wouldn't have gotten better and I did the right thing