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2010 and society still does not recognize the role of stepparents.

Gia's picture

I can't believe that we are so advanced in technology and psychology and stepparents are still rarely recognized. It is actually not common to have kids that have the same brothers and sisters with the same married, parents. I would think that blended families are soooo common that society was actually giving some recognition to the role.

Some of my observations are:

1) Facebook: For those that use this social network, it has an option that you can put family members in your profile-personal settings: it has mother, father, brother, sister, daughter, son. i didn't have SD there and DH actually mentioned it. Well, I don't really consider her my daughter, she is my stepdaughter, but no option for that so, i don't feel comfortable putting "daughter" as replacement. I just DON'T...

2)Birthday cards, and things of that nature, is actually hard for find one that relates to stepparenting.

3)Schools (preschool-elementary) they make no emphasis on the dynamics of blended families and show this by never encouraging to consider the stepparent as part of the family. For instance making cards for mother's and father's day ONLY for bio parent and no stepparent. With questions like "Who does te grocery shopping at your house, mommy or daddy? SD5 brought home a paper from school titled "draw your family" and it had different empty squares for mommy, daddy, pet, brother, sister.

4)TV shows for young children. There is a song that really bothers me it is called "Family" and they play it like 20 times a day in noggin/nick Jr. and here is the link if you want to listen to it: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HDeh7kzXQrc

That song mentions MANY different family members, even FRIENDS, but not stepparent!

I wonder if it is because society expects us to fall into the category of mom or dad. Then, how is it that we deal with a totally different set of issues as bio mom and dads. Oh, i got the answer, nobody gives a S#%T about stepparents...

I welcome other examples of how our role is not recognized in our daily basis activities, even in the insignificant stuff.

Comments

belleboudeuse's picture

This is even more ridiculous because 2010 is the year that there will be more stepfamilies in America than any other type of family (single parent or traditional first marriage).

BB

You are not second best, you are not second class. Do not ever let anyone make you feel that way. - 2BLoved

JustAnotherSM's picture

My aunt is on her 3rd marriage. She has 1 biokid and 2 grandkids. She also has 3 stepkids and 6 stepgrandkids. The mantra in her house is "there are no steps in this house - only the ones that lead to the door". My aunt is called grandma by every one of the grandkids. All of the parties for this family include my aunt's H and his ex, who get along great for the sake of everyone involved. So, it is possible to have a blended family without the scarlet letter S. But, this could never happen in my world.

I always hated being forgotten by SS and DH on mother's day. I realize I'm not BM, but do I deserve to be totally ignored? I threw a hissy fit one year and made them both acknowledge me for mother's day, but it lost all meaning. Do you think they remembered the next year? NO! Sad

Mommyto1Stepto2's picture

I can relate to this. Dh did something one year, I think beucase I mentioned it, but then the next year did nothing. Totally made me feel like a piece of crap!!

lovelovelove's picture

LOL...I've been watching this soap since I was a teenager! Crazy Annie is a murderer and is very evil. A little different than WE step-mom's. She is actually more like BM...completely nuts and thinks she is sane and always coniving and manipulating to get her way!! She only did the bone marrow transplant to gain a place in the family, she actually hates JR!!

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