Adult step children ruining my marriage
I know this may be just another story here. I just do not know how to deal with this. My marriage of 4 years is dangerously close to splitting up. So close in fact that we actually split for almost a week. To ma. ke a loooonnngggg story short and to give you an idea of what I am dealing with. My husband called my step daughter this morning to let her know that we were working out our issues. She responded by telling him that he was ruining the memories she and her brother have of him and their mom.
Facts:
hubby and thier mom have been divorced for 6 years and I did not meet him until a year after thier speration.
step daughter is 23 engaged, has a 3 year old daughter and has one divorce under her belt already.
What and how to do I keep her from ruining my marriage. She knows her dad loves her and that child and she holds the child over his head and will keep after him so much it wears him down.
Frustrated and do not know what to do..
Just let DH know that if he
Just let DH know that if he thinks he is responsible for his daughter's memories and happiness then he has a big problem. Tell him you know SD wants him and her mom back together and any woman who is in the way wrecks her life. So he has a choice to make. Go back to BM because it will make his daughter happy or live his life being the best person he can be.
The adult daughter's
The adult daughter's activities, thoughts, etc are MEANINGLESS. You can truly "ignore the whore". But what is critically important is how your DH handles all of this.
She can have histrionics naked out in the street - so long as your DH ignores her crap and goes on with his life with you. But if he wants to pay attention to her demands and ignore you well being - well then your marriage is toast. It's all about his choices.
Do what I did....tell your DH
Do what I did....tell your DH to go and marry his daughter seeing he cares more about her feelings then about yours...we separated after 6 months of being married!!
I think a clue for me was,
I think a clue for me was, "My husband called my step daughter this morning to let her know that we were working out our issues." Why is he even telling her anything? Does he feel he needs her permission to act? Is she more his "wife" vs. you? These type of situations are bad, bad, bad, where DH AND SM let the kids control their relationship/marriage. In that one short paragraph or two you posted above, I can not only tell you have let this SK control your marriage, but this adult-kid is actually enjoying it. You both need to go to counseling and learn how to shut her down bigtime.
I let my XSD have her
I let my XSD have her dadddyyyyy back. It was her or me and I chose ME. I was not about to live with a another adult female in my house that was a clone of her horrid mother. And a product of exH's rotten "I never tell my kids no" parenting style. Heard they had a lovely date last weekend. Whoooo caressss lmao. So disgusting.
DH is the one ruining your
DH is the one ruining your marriage. Why in the world would he call his daughter first thing in the morning to tell her about his marital issues. She's right, I mean why would she want to hear about any of it and have your "couple" issues in her head. Dh needs to stop oversharing with her. You two need counseling plain and simple.