Bullying StepchildrenSubmitted by suzannetiago on Wed, 02/21/2007 - 5:42am
I am a stepmother to three children ages 16,9 & 8 years old. They are all boys. I have no children of my own. I am finding it very difficult with the younger two children, they stay with their mother most nights and there is weekend access and 1 weeknight stay. The younger two children do not listen to me at all. They are very nasty to me, hitting, spitting, and bullying me. I am in a very difficult position as I am unable to discipline them and end up saying very little to them when they swear at me calling me a fuc***** c***, bitch etc. They are very rude and despite me making an concerted effort with them for nearly over a year and a half i.e taking them for days out on my own with them, spending quality time playing with them it has been to no avail. They are rude, obnoxious ungrateful and just generally not very nice children. Their extended family, aunts, uncles, friends of family spend very little time with them as they are very unruly, badly behaved etc. The general concensus is that they are simply not nice. I have no children of my own and I have tried to make them my friends but it just has not worked. They are just so nasty to me, I have started to withdraw from them, talk very little to them and just keep myself busy when they are round. They say that they hate me, wish I was dead. I have started to feel very frightened of them and absolute dread it when they come round because they are so demanding, I want, I want, I want. they expect me to cook, get drinks for them, play with etc and then say absolute disgusting things to me for no apparent reason. The father does very little to discipline them when they hit or swear at me as he is forever the guilty father. More and more I am staretd to do less with them and I am really questioning my realtionship with the father as they are always going to be part of his life. But I feel I simply cannot be treated like a punch bag for his children. I need some advice, I do not swear at them never hit them back I just walk away and call a friend for support. The father is forever masking their behvaiour behind the fact they are children and they will learn with age. He gives me no support and feel very alone and bullied by a 9 & 8 year old. The 16 year old is fine.