When my daughter was 11/12 it came to my attention that there was this thing in Jr high where the girls wear different color bracelets, (just little cheap nylon ones..not live strong ones)

Each one representing a different sex act that she would "perform" on/with the guy who removed it from her wrist. There are also "lipstick parties" or "rainbow parties" that high school (maybe younger) age teens partake in as well.....

My daughter was in grade six when I heard of these things....so I did have a conversation with her about it. But in exactly the words described above.....no specifics. (no mention of lipstick or rainbow topics..just the bracelets) She didn't know what the bracelets "meant" and was very grossed out.....when I informed her.

I don't feel comfortable talking about discussing the subject in any greater detail with my child.....but I do know that word on the street is....."they don't consider it sex....therefore its as acceptable as a kiss goodnight"...........

They are so young to know anything about this stuff.....but they are bombarded with sexual images and pressures at younger and younger ages.........

I will talk openly to BOTH my boy and girl to beware of members of the opposite sex who may be out take advantage of them.....

I speak to them in generalities about these issues ....for now.......

do you stay with her.. That makes no sense to me.. I know you probably love her but if she is with her daughters making you so miserable then I think I would take my happy butt somewhere else.. She is your wife who is suppose to stand beside you not treat you the way you are saying.
I think I would just say you know what by - see ya.. Do you have kids together? Whos house is it? IS it in both names or what.. Just asking because I think I would give her the boot.. Let someone else try to pick up the pieces and take care of her and her daughters..
I just say that why stay in an environment if you are so miserable.. Its obvious where you stand in her eyes..

Well on this topic kids are learning about sex at very young ages.. My daughter had a boy in 2nd grade tell her on the play ground Quote on quote " you will be my girlfriend and suck my dick" my daughter was only 8 years old and so was this boy who said it to her.. I about died and really I was so taken back and surprised, that when she asked me what a dick was I said Richard its short for the name Richard.. I have since then sat her down and talked to her about sex so she does not get the wrong impression of it or hear things that are not correct.. Oral sex look though it was on TV when Pres. Clinton and Monica.. They are young but now a days sad to say but they are probably experimenting.. Its a scary world out here now days, kids there ages are having babies.. Now that is scary..

Do your stepdaughters talk about oral sex? Is that what you are saying here..

okay...i'm totally lost...what! ok from meb's original post: what sorts of problems did you go through, can you be more specific? maybe we can help you w/suggestions to problems that is going on right now and maybe save your marriage.

-happy mom

...then they are old enough to hear the true facts from their parents, regardless of age. In fact, if they are already talking about it, then "the talk" is probably long overdue.

I think you have to start giving them little bits of information at a time and you have to start young. (Not saying get explicit with a six year-old, but you know what I mean.) My son was five when I got pregnant with his sister and he wanted very much to know how she got in my belly. He'd asked about where babies come from even before that. I told him that mama has eggs and daddy has a fertilizer that makes the eggs grow into babies and that it works that way for just about every form of life. That was enough of an explanation for him, so I didn't dwell much on the physiological aspects of procreation, but I did go into a lot of detail about what has to happen FIRST... meeting, getting to know each other, spending a lot of time together, falling in love, waiting to make sure that love will last, making a permanent commitment, having completed his education, having a good job that will support a family, getting engaged, long engagement, getting married and then after a couple of years having a baby.

He's almost nine and I've been letting him know a little at a time in language that he's mature enough to understand that there are stages of life to go through first, that there's a process you have to go through, that it takes age, maturity, love and commitment. I told him that eggs can get fertilized without all of that, but that life can get very complicated if you don't "follow the rules," so to speak, when it comes to relationships.

He isn't old enough to want to know all the sordid details yet about how babies are made, but hopefully when he is, he'll already know that the physical act should be accompanied by all that other stuff. Not that as a hormonal teenaged boy he won't be chasing the girls, I'm sure he will and he will probably even catch a few of them, but hopefully I'm laying the foundation for him to use his head as well as other body parts when he gets older.

When I was in college, this was about fifteen years ago, I worked in a hospital emergency room parttime. I will never forget one twelve year-old child that we sent to L&D to give birth. Sad, sad, sad. I didn't even know what sex was at twelve and here she was giving birth at that same age. It totally disgusted me, but I will never forget that and I think it shocked me enough that I will probably be hyper-vigilant when it comes to letting my kids out of the house without adult supervision.

As far as the marriage goes, only the two people in it can make the decision to save it or ditch it, but I think before you give up you have to ask yourself if you are satisfied that you did every single thing you could to save it.

~ Anne ~

~ Anne ~