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I don't like his kids...not even a little

mom713's picture

Hello I am new here, a little backstory. My BF and i met at our previous job it's been 2 years so far. He a son 11 years old and a daughter 7 years old. My son is 4 and daughter is 2. My babies are no saints, still learning behavior/boundries/social skills etc. I absolutley hate when his kids are here (he gets them every weekend). His son is so immature however my bf says it's because his BM mentally abused him he says his son went to therapy the therapist says "he reverts to a 3 your old mindset to "protect himself"". This immaturity is beyond what you think. he takes toys from my son....picks at him bothers him and he's even threatend to stab with a pencil. This boy is so weird....no other way to say it he's literally weird acts like a cartoon, can't tie his shoes, cant bathe/wash his hair, clip his nail or clean ears, all those things my bf does!! I'm not emotionally inclined to either of his kids at all they just bother me...both over weight....generally unattractive (to me). His daughter is a smart ass, a know it all, a spoiled brat. If my son wants to play with her she blatantly ignores him....SO RUDE! I get they are old and my kids are small but they have feelings. If i give her direction or ask her to do something she ignores as if im not there. I've resulted into camping out in my room til the weekend is over. My BF and i have had issues over this and i know he wants me to bond with his kids but i just can't vibe with them. i feel nothing but disgust and dislike for them I know this sounds horrible for a mom to say but i just don't like them....not even a little. I won't be upset if he leaves me over this i know it's a big deal im thinking of just ripping the band-aid and moving back with my folks.

ndc's picture

My advice would be to do just that. This won't get any better, and every weekend is a terrible schedule. Cut your losses.

tog redux's picture

I love these parents who blame the other bio parent for the child's issues, while fully enabling those issues to continue. 

"It's BM's fault he can't tie his shoes!" says BF, while he ties his 11-year-old's shoes. 

Please cut your losses and move on. This stuff is hard enough when you like their kids okay.

TwoOfUs's picture

Yep.

Totally agree. I generally liked my skids and still hated visitation weekends because of the disruption, feeling like an outsider, the extra expenses...etc. It's awful even when the kids are normal and likable. 

Harry's picture

This is how you really want your life to be like ?   The kid is 11,  He not going to change. Only going to get worst.  
Remember, SS living with you full time 24/7/365. Is only one BM accident away. Or BM finds her boy toy who doesn't like kids and she moves way with boy toy. Leaving you the kids,

More likely, she will not be able to control SS and dump him on BF 

juststressedbeyondbelief's picture

100% leave.

He probably thinks the same thing about your kids, even if he doesn't say it.

There's a stink about children that aren't yours that works both ways.