These "kids" are adults. Why does he have to read every text every time they text? If they have an emergency, they need to call 911. These aren't minor children that need a parent to come sign so they can get medical care or Daddy to read a story so they can go nighty night. If they're bitches, he should stop responding to their shit.

I'll tell ya something, I think parents really make some serious mistakes when it comes to allowing kids to give ultimatums, come between married partners, dictate how things are going to be, etc. My parents didn't do that shit. They told us what time dinner was. If we showed up, we ate. If we didn't, and we were expected, it was rude, and they told us as much. If they were hosting a holiday gathering, we were told what time it was going to be and where, and we were expected to clean ourselves and our kids up, get it in gear, show up, smile, and be polite to everyone at the gathering regardless of our differences. If I had ever told my dad that he should choose between me and his wife, he would have told me that it was nice knowing me, and to give him a call when I have pulled my head from my ass.

What must these adult childrens' marriages be like? Do these bitches talk to their husbands this way? It would be a sad day that one of my sons treated my husband the way your steps treat you. Sad for them because I'd slap those words right out of their mouths.

I'm sorry Lost. Been there, done that. Sometimes I mourn my old self. I'm sure you know the one who used to like to bake cookies, decorate, play carols,buy presents, make everything all warm and fuzzy and cook a fabulous feast. Get excited about the holidays......yea, I remember me .....sort of. SD's sure as hell can kill all that! I remember 2 Christmases where SD would announce she wouldn't come for Christmas. DH would say fine and politely hang up. Then she would keep calling us during the holiday and whisper dramatically something like she was dying and DH would keep taking the calls and say, "I can't hear you speak up!" Now it is black mail. Haven't seen my precious gskids since Dec. 09.

Advice. Ignore , ignore, ignore. If DH reads you the text, pat his hand and look kindly into his eyes and tell him how sorry you are HE has to put up with such cruel girls. Emphasize the HE part.
Secondly, sweetly ask on Christmas when the NICE people are gathered at your house, for him to turn off his phone so as not to be interrupted.(man I wish I would have done that!)
Thirdly, buy nothing and participate in nothing. I made the mistake of still buying, sending I love you cards etc. for a couple of years. Here is what happens. The grandskids stuff gets thrown on my front porch with a nasty letter about keeping my "cheap crap" but the check(substantial amount of money) gets endorsed and cashed in the spring.
Fourthly, you will just have to believe me when I tell you it WILL get better. It just takes time just like mourning a loved one does. Time heals. I heard myself chuckling out loud here a few times the past few months.
Holidays put a spotlight on all the pain we have in our heart. We put so much expectation on having a "hap hap hap glorious occassion" and are too often disappointed even when skids aren't involved.
I no longer feel the need to be superwoman. I do however, plan on trying to enjoy the holidays but maybe less traditional , less stress, more smiling .
Hugs! Keep checking in here!

Ahh! Yes Towanda, the grandchildren. The nuclear weapon of choice for evil selfish self centered people.

My husbands daughter made it very clear she was on a mission to break us up and see us both dead. She had no shame in letting everyone know that, and in still coming here demanding things if her father and putting me in my place.

She worked flat out for 7 years on this mission. The last two after her mum died were the most difficult. Anyway she finally decided as nothing had worked she would go behind boyfriends back and breed her own nuclear weapon to use in the fight to break up our marriage.

We saw her about 3 times during the entire pregnancy. She had no wish or need to see her father during that time because she knew she had won her baby was going to break us up for her. So she relaxed and left us alone.

Baby us born we go into the hospital and as I extend my hand to give her a gift she turns her face away and stares at the mattress.

She talked non stop to her daddy about the baby, how beautiful she was, what lovely eyes, hair etc., anything and everything to make daddy take notice of this baby. When we left she stood up grabbed the baby and without a word if a lie shoved that baby into my husbands face. Telling him to say goodbye to Deanna. Making sure this baby was real to him.

That night in the hospital was the final straw for me. That night when we left I told my husband it was over. I was done trying with his daughter.

Two nights later we get a phone call just after 9pm it's the boyfriend telling DH baby is home from hospital. They were so sure this baby would win the war. They knew we were up at 4:30 - 5:00am but they thought DH would get out if bed and go around there to see the bomb blast.

He didn't. In fact it was two weeks later when she called him at work and he then rang me to say we were going to her house that night to see the baby. That was the first time I ever refused my husband. I reminded him how she had treated me in the hospital and refused to go. So he rings her boyfriend (not her) and tells the boyfriend that I won't go there because I am sick of the way Sd treats me.

NOTE: see how he put that all in me. Not he will not go there and put up with the way his daughter treats his wife. No, it was all just ME.

Anyway smart mouth boyfriend then tells my husband, well nothing is going to change. My husband said so you are saying if I want to see my grandchild I have to leave my wife. Didn't hear boyfriends response, must have been a yes though because DH said well I guess I won't be seeing my granddaughter then.

Sd then realizing she needed more troups involves FIL. FIL is 89 had just had bowel cancer surgery and she is in his ear crying daddy won't go and see her baby.

Long story short. This baby!s birth which should have been a joyous occasion, and a new member of the family, turned out to be the catalyst for ripping the whole family apart. FIL no longer speaks to me and if DH did not call him. FIL would not speak to DH.

FIL is at the very end of his life and thanks to Sd he is after all these years barely on speaking terms with his only son.

SD did not break up our marriage. But she did break up her family.

Nothing good has come of her having a baby to break up her fathers marriage. Well not for Sd anyway

For me. I am glad to be done with the lot of them. No more pressure, no more Italian guilt. No more 4 hour trips to cook and clean and sleep on an air mattress trying to please an old man who cannot be pleased. No one in my husbands family is ever happy. Now at least after all these years I AM.

I do get annoyed when the steps break into our couple time with their phone calls. My DH usually doesn't carry his phone with at all, or otherwise has it on silent, so it doesn't happen often. The only time I see DH in a bad mood is after a phone call from one of his two kids. They like to rain on our parade now and then.

SD32 e-mails daily to DH at work, sometimes several times a day, which I don't like at all when he's on company time. She has few people in her life so I guess I can put it in that perspective.

I was really annoyed when, while we were on vacation in London, she e-mailed page after page of house listings, wanting DH to help her choose one. DH didn't even look at it, which I'm glad he didn't allow her to impose on our vacation time. We were out of the country for heaven sakes! Good thing our honeymoon was on a ship with no cell or internet service, or I'm sure she would have intruded on that one too.

It really pissed her off when we both deleted our facebook accounts right after we got married, so she doesn't have a drama stage on that forum at least.

Why on Earth would a man choose his grown ass daughters over his wife? Do they want to have sex with him, too? Do they not realize how idiotic they sound? They are two completely different relationships...or should be.

I can remember one time in 16 years that my SD tried to get my husband to put me in my place in defense of her. He shot her down quick and she knew never to try that again. She has never had the nerve that these SD's I read about here have, so I have been pretty lucky.

As far as the texting, SD does not have either of our cell phone numbers. If she has something to say to him, she is going to have to actually say it. Technology has made it so easy for these assholes to show their asses!

Right now, SD is mad that she couldn't come over this past Monday (to get her Christmas present, no doubt) so she is not calling. She tried to put a guilt trip on him about her kids. Not a smart move on her part and it totally backfired.

Can't you deliberately focus elsewhere? Use your counselor to help you realize that if you simply disregard what these people think you can dismiss all of their opinions and actions.

These are just words. Meaningless since nobody of any consequence to your life believes them if they indeed even hear them. Do your children hear them? Your supervisor at work if you still work? Co-workers? Neighbors? Check out person at the grocers? No of course not. Nobody who is pertinent to your life even knows about these fools.

Let them rant and rave and piss and moan among themselves. Tell your husband that you no longer want to hear anything about them. Not about their texts, phone calls or emails - nothing. If one of them is in the hospital you don't want to know. They don't exist.

It really is so simple that to do otherwise would make me think twice about your motives in this toxic mix.