Definitely need some advice...
My boyfriend and I are discussing marriage so I don't have step children yet but I'm in a situation and could use help from those of you with adult step kids.
My BF was divorced a very long time ago. He has 2 children ages 22 and 28. He has dated over the years but nothing very serious until I came along. His 22 year old is very independent and functional. We get along just fine. The 28 year old is the complete opposite. He is single, no girlfriend, no strong friendships, no hobbies. He is used to getting anything he wants from his dad and just recently moved out. He can't make a decision on his own and constantly texts his dad. Usually the texting increases when I am with his dad.
He ignores me. Acts like I am not even in the room. He will have a conversation with his dad and act like I'm not there. He will walk in the room and talk to his dad like I'm invisible. Dad doesn't think this should bother me because his son is not overtly nasty to me. He thinks it's pretty much ok that he just ignores me. I'm too sensitive. He thinks I should be fine having him over for dinner or the football game and it shouldn't bother me that he goes out of his way to ignore me. I think it's disrespectful and shouldn't be tolerated from a 28 year old man. He thinks his son will "outgrow" it.
So we are an an impasse. I've never been in a relationship like this. I don't know what's normal and what isn't. Dad does have a problem with son's behavior but he excuses it saying his son is just immature and needs to grow up. I feel like dad is just an enabler and the son will never change and I will be forced to just go along or pack it up and leave.
We've been together 18 months and the only thing we ever argue about is this issue with his son. In my opinion, the son is very jealous of our relationship and is working to drive a wedge between us. Again, my BF thinks his son is just immature and will change once he has been on his own for awhile.