After years of good relationship my stepdaughter decide not to talk to me anymore
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I don't know what to do or what to say. I cry all the time and this thing of having my stepdaughter not talking to me is killing me. (Worst thing: my husband isn't helping). She just took me out of FB because she doesn't want me to "try" to help her son - now 20 - and doing nothing with his life. I am a nurse, is in my nature trying to help people, and of course I am not saying anything to hurt her or the boy. I don't know how to approach her...I want things to be good again. Thank you for your advise.
What are you saying/doing on
What are you saying/doing on FB that has offended and/or angered her about her son? FB is not a good place to be 'helpful' no matter how well meaning your intentions are.
You've not given much to let us really know what's going on (except for the fact whatever is going on has upset your SD). Could you be a bit more specific?
Agreed, I made war with some
Agreed, I made war with some friends by posting my feelings about Whole Foods selling rabbit meat, to boycott it if they felt the same way. Well I had several "friends" post about how delicious rabbits are and so on....I have 5 rabbits, all spayed and neutered, costing as much as a pet cat....I am very open to opinions but the comments but about how they "taste" was extremely rude. Facebook is a joke now, we can all take posts the wrong way. If they block you, who the hell really cares, if you have a hobby, go do that. They are the ones missing out. My grandmother made me sun dresses and a matching one for my barbie doll, what kind of mom would let her kid miss out on that???? What kind of mom keeps their kids from their grandparents??? Did you do something to piss her off???
Yes, That's a good advise. I
Yes, That's a good advise. I am doing that. Thanks.
Well, my SD is 42, is the
Well, my SD is 42, is the younger of 4 and has been with us 30 years in good relationship. I don't vent anything in FB, I think is a way for her to tell me she is upset, and it's fine with me. But yes, I am giving unsolicited advise, I already apologized. Thank you for your words.
I am sorry that you are
I am sorry that you are hurting and feel rejected. And I do not throw compassion around lightly.
Time to understand that humans will be humans and they do things that they need to do. Maybe she needs a break.
I take people off FB all the time, not because I hate them, but because we do not have the same beat. Maybe she feels your replies are implying she is a bad mother (therefore the need for you to step in).
Give it time. She'll come around. Stop pushing her for now. Do not mention anything.
I believe families by marriage should not be on each other's Facebook. Nothing good comes of that. Blood will always be thicker than water.
(hugs)
Your last line made me laugh:
Your last line made me laugh: DH and I aren't on each other's FB! I have never even seen his page and I'm guessing he hasn't seen mine either! Just gave me the giggles seeing your last line.
I think as stepmoms we open
I think as stepmoms we open our hearts and we want acceptance from our steps. Sometimes it happens and in those good moments we feel wanted, appreciated and we think it is working but I wonder just how much the step child invests in us.....you know what I mean? They might be nice but are they ever really accepting? I kind of wonder if perhaps your SD was not as ib=vested as you thought she was?