Get a Medical Power of Attorney and a Living Will. You get one each for him; he gets one each for you. When the Coven bring this up w/ dear ol' dad, he can tell them he's already had it taken care of legally, so there's no need for them to shoulder that burden for him. Keep extra copies handy so that whenever your husband is admitted anywhere, you already have them available to hand over to the medical staff; also, always keep a copy with *you*.

An advanced directive such as a living will, will clearly show medical personell what your husband does or does not want done. Below is a link where you and he can go make living wills for yourselves. Multiple copies, each needs to be notorized to snuff any legal wranglings that the coven may attempt.

Living will:
http://www.legacywriter.com/livingwill.asp?src=g12download3&gclid=CKvE--...

More importantly, you need your husband to fill out, complete and notorize who his healthcare surrogate will be. This is legal paperwork that states if he is not capable of making healthcare decisions for himself, this one person listed on this piece of paper, is the only one to make decisions for him:

Healthcare Surrogate:
http://www.thehospice.org/uploaded_items/resourcedocuments/SurrogateEn.pdf

KrisnKids is correct: Medical personell should defer to you as you are his wife. The forms I have listed above will weather any legal storm the coven could bring if they attempt to sieze control. These are generic forms, please please please, check with your states guidelines to ensure they do not have a specific qualifying guideline that is required/ omitted.

Wow! That's a really long time to put up with their crap. We need to come up with some kind of award for you!

I can see my adult skids pulling the same crap in that situation. Their concern will be purely for monetary gain, as they will only "care" until the will is read. That's fine....I don't think they realize that, because their mother left them with DH when they were quite small and he had to raise them without a penny of support from her, there pretty much is NO money to leave them. When he should have been climbing the corporate ladder, he pretty much turned down good promotions to stay home more and take care of them. Granted, he did a crappy job of it, but he made the effort.

In your case, definitely get the living will and medical power of attorney. It will save you a LOT of grief in the long run and will prevent his children from interferring in important medical decisions.

The hospital or other care facility will want the living will and health care power of attorney on file. Make sure you give them copies and carry a copy with you. Make sure the primary care physician has a copy, and be sure to talk with the nursing staff. (Nurses are saints in my opinion.)

My Mom was recently hospitalized and I am health care power of attorney. I didn't have issues of steps but there was confusion about who was empowered to make what decision (I have three siblings and each vocal and opinionated). It took a fair amount of effort to keep the players straight, and the health care facilities wouldn't always contact me. If a nurse or doc or other care provider doesn't work with you the way the legal documents stipulate, call them out on it. I had to do that, but only once at each facility. There are liability issues for the facilities and they will want this to be as clear as possible for their own protection.

Best wishes for you and your husband. This is no fun.

Been there done that. Adult step vipers turned up at hospital the night my husband had his prostate removed due to cancer. Seems that was as good a place as any for Friday night drinks. They had alcohol in soft drink bottles (soda bottles), and behaved like trash. DH recovered sons disappeared, but SD still hung around for couple of years stressing him out until I said enough and banned her from my home. SD is a nurse, well that's what she thinks, but there are nurses who are angels then there are idiots like her who since graduation has parked herself in recovery because she has a germ phobia and doesn't like touching sick people....WTF. Anyway in the two years since my husbands surgery DH has busted a gut trying to stress the life out of my husand and myself, and according to the boyfriend has spent considerable time and effort trying to work out what we are worth financially. I was at the nurses station trying to find out why my husband had not come back to the room after 7 hours for a 4 hour surgery, when a nurse walked past and said my husband and his doctor were back. Found SD chatting to surgeon and getting all the info. I was livid particularly as I had previously advised the surgeon of the stress being caused in the family by SD. For the first time I was a rude as she was, I simply said to the surgeon mid SD sentence I was at the nurses station trying to find you, and I would like you to tell ME how things went. Embarrassed surgeon SD and myself the way I said it, but the msg. got across. SD Nurse after surgeon left said she would show DH how to use the call button, before I could tell her DH was not a moron, she had picked it up, and started pushing buttons, turned off the light, turned on the tv and was about to raise the bed when her boyfrien grabbed it from her and he and I both said together it is the button with the picture of the nurse on it.

They all continued with drinks until I left the room at 11pm to get the nurses to tell them to leave, as they would not go when I asked them to leave(they were getting very loud by this stage), anyway I guess they twigged as to what was going on because boyfriend stuck his head out the door when I was at nurses station and as I was talking to nurse they all walked out and left. Walked straight past me and didn't even say goodbye.

What is wrong with these stepkids, they claim to love daddy, yet they make his life miserable, and they hang around like vultures waiting to collect the spoils left behind after his death.

Other's here have advised you to get a living will, power of attorney etc., may I suggest you follow their advice, at a time like this you do not need the added pressure.

DH is cancer free..........Sons are no where to be seen, SD did hang around as I said till I threw her out, but I expect if they hear on the grapevine he is ever unwell again, they will crawl back out of the sewer they live in and hover around like the vultures they are. By the way for the record after the last experience I WOULD NEVER NEVER TELL THE IF MY HUSBAND WERE TO GO BACK INTO HOSPITAL. I am my husbands carer and I do not need this shit and I will never set myself up for it to happen again. This is not because I am mean, selfish or lack compassion, it is because they are mean selfish and lack compassion.