There has been a lot of issues with my husband's lack of parenting of my two stepsons over the years. I was already thinking about divorce last year, then it came out that older SS had been SAing the younger one. I still want to go through with the divorce and I want primary custody to keep our shared child safe, but am afraid that the courts would still go with 50/50 after reading about the way some custody battles have gone.

My main concern is that he ignored the warning signs of older SS. There was a CPS case when they were younger for older SS touching younger SS in the tub that was found unsubstantiated. Baths together stopped, but then I noticed that older SS would always go into the bathroom when younger SS was showering. I told my husband it needed to stop, he told them to stop, but didn't keep an eye on the situation. I had to keep pointing it out to him for months before it finally stopped. Then older SS threated a girl at school and it went to DJS, therapy was required. That therapy didn't last long. I kept telling my husband that he still needed therapy, but he kept making excuses.

Then the most recent was late last year when younger SS finally admitted that older SS had been r*ping him for years. Older SS was removed right away, and is supposedly not coming back here. CPS was involved and said that younger SS shouldn't be left alone with our toddler (It wasn't written in the safety plan that we got at the first meeting with them, but I thought I saw it in other paperwork, but can't find that now) Within the first couple months, he left them alone in the house (no one else even on the property at the time) and drove off. I was walking, saw him pass, so rushed back home. There were also a few times when he asked if we were leaving them alone in the car together while we went inside a store, but I didn't let that happen. There are a lot more issues I have seen with him and the kids as well. Unfortunatly, there is no evidence or witnesses to the bathroom/shower or leaving them alone right after CPS said not to.

I would like to think that a judge would see this pattern of "neglect" and give me primary custody, but I know there are some shitty judges out there. I will be looking for an attorney soon.

Younger SS is also on the sprectrum and had a history of hitting/biting/kicking when younger, so that makes the situation even more difficult. I am really afraid of him getting our child for any length of time and her getting hurt because he couldn't/wouldn't protect her.