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Disengaging HELP

Ninja chick's picture

I am trying so hard to disengage and have me time. ( FYI I finalley got my car back and he fixed his truck. ) Well I've been telling him for months wash your kids sheets there rm smells like piss. I open there window and light a candel daily. He won't do it so I finalley did. Unless I make him he won't bathe them while there here. He will let his youngest run in a piss diaper half the damn day. First thing I do is get the youngest changed right when we get them from BM because we have got the youngest with blisters numerous times. Then SD4 is always sent to us with dirty greasy hair and what to me sounds like a blader infection. So I insure he does these things. How do I stand by and watch this and not put in my two cents?

Comments

Ninja chick's picture

Seems like we all are tonight. It's hard not to bud in when it's stuff like this.

alwaysanxious's picture

what a night! Now to avoid them the rest of the weekend. I really wish you luck. Your issues would get to me too. How could someone leave their kid in diapers.

Ninja chick's picture

There's always an excuse but I don't know how. Lazy I guess it gets changed after lunch breakfast and dinner that's it. Unless I do it

Ninja chick's picture

Ya I'm really not sure what else to do cause that's a kid ya know. Not her fault her moms a whore and she's only some made of some one I resent. But she still doesn't need to be my responsabilty FDH needs to be a better dad or give his rights up like he can.

AVR1962's picture

My husband was very layed back and pretty much left everything to me also, he was the one that had custody. It was like pulling teeth to get him involved at all. Looking back now, 22 years later, I should ahve walked away. It never did change. I can't say that I think bio mom's house would have been any better, she was definately in her own world but it was their responsibility, not mine. The boys only wanted their bio parents. I became the main parent and there is lots of hard feelings all the way around now. You are in a hard sitaution and I feel for what you are going thru. I wish I had the answers but I could not get my husband involved either.

Ninja chick's picture

Yep he cooks and plays with em nothing else. He needs to start doing more if he didn't have me his whole world would fall apart! Big headed no honest. I pay half of everything cover all luxeries and do all the house hold chores. He does by the groceries but I'm not paying for his kids food. I bought my self a bag of chettos to treat me sense I mainly eat healthy and his kids ate it all and got my house gross. I know it sounds stupid but it's he princiable of it. I guess I shouldn't expect anything more from him he doesn't even clean after his self.

herewegoagain's picture

That would not fly with me. That is unacceptable. I have had many issues with my DH...but within weeks of us living together I told him it was HIS responsiblity to feed his daughter, get her clothes ready, etc...and he did. Yes, if we went out I did her hair or something, but that was the extent of it...it was HIS job to tell her to take a bath, etc...I think you are being used and it is not fair. If he can't do it, you need to take a break and move out...let someone call CPS on HIM...otherwise, you risk being there and either doing it all or having CPS called if YOU don't do it because technically, you are an adult in the house...