You are here

Progress Reports came out and BM is grounding SS11 for 1 F

tryingtokeepthesanity's picture

Submitted by tryingtokeepthe... on Sat, 04/25/2009 - 7:58am

OK I know as a Mom that grades are important but BM isn't addressing the other issues he has.....F's in the homework grade for EVERY class. She left this drama voicemail that SS11 isn't going back to soccer until he improves his grade. My BD10 plays on the same team and there is only 11 players total.

There is 1 practice a week (her night with all 3 kids) and 1 game on Saturday at 10pm. I think that leaves plenty of time during the rest of week to make sure that your kid does their homework. Yes, she forgot to mention that. I think she doesn't want to take him anymore and its just an excuse.

DH called her back to let her know that the team has pictures and she said she didn't know. I gave the form to SS14 who first tried to say that I didn't and then said he gave it to SS11. She said he could go for pictures. Lets's see...

Also..When DH dropped off the other 2 at her house (of course she wasn't there) and SS11 came out and DH had him get his report...we went home and made a copy and drove it back. That's when we found out that all homework grades are really low. DH talked to him about it and he said he just doesn't want to do it at his Mom's and lies to her but does his homework at DH because he knows not to lie or he will be in trouble. Its funny what kids pick up from their parents.

For a kid with ADD you would think you would want him to get the energy out of him instead of sitting inside all day.

BM doesn't want to take responsibility and this is going to be shown to the attorney. BM changed the password for SS11 so we are unable to see his grades.

I can't wait to watch her lie in court.....she lies like the day is long!

Comments

TinaKay's picture

Submitted by TinaKay on Sat, 04/25/2009 - 8:07am

in some states it means another year of child support.
Could be her plan.

You could seek legal help if you can't work with BM to get the kid on track, it may be cheaper than paying another year of CS,
and maybe not a bad idea. What you dont want to do is start playing games with BM in hoping a mind game is going to fix things ( as many posters here seem to do).
Keep it all NONPERSONAL between you and BM and work to fix the problem, not involve personal grudes because you dont like her. The fact is she ( BM) may not know how to fix the problem herself.

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Sat, 04/25/2009 - 9:14am

Get off your friggin pedestal.

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

belleboudeuse's picture

Submitted by belleboudeuse on Sat, 04/25/2009 - 10:47am

PLEASE stop fanning the flames in your post. Please stop with the passive-aggressive off the cuff remarks. Your parenthetical comment here is completely inappropriate, off-topic, and created a misunderstanding that made the original poster feel she was being attacked (see below). You are poisoning the atmosphere here.

Honestly. This is a support site. If you are not here to support people, and be respectful of everyone, even those you disagree with, then I have to ask myself what is your real reason for being here? You must see that many, many people here are extremely offended by you. If I was the person offending so many, I would feel terrible, and I would immediately apologize and do my best to change my behavior. I really hope you will do the same.

BB

- You are not second best, you are not second class. Do not ever let anyone make you feel that way. (2Bloved)

Last Nerve's picture

Submitted by Last Nerve on Sat, 04/25/2009 - 12:25pm

She will not change her attitude, everyone has tried. She's right, we're all wrong. Period. We know nothing about having kids, raising them, trying to blend a family. She is the All Knowing, and as soon we realize that, be happier she will be. :sick:

belleboudeuse's picture

Submitted by belleboudeuse on Sat, 04/25/2009 - 9:18pm

Funny thing is, she's more than willing to respond to someone who gives her an opening to say something catty, but she hasn't responded to any of my 3(?) or so requests for her to be mature.

BB

- You are not second best, you are not second class. Do not ever let anyone make you feel that way. (2Bloved)

Last Nerve's picture

Submitted by Last Nerve on Sat, 04/25/2009 - 9:26pm

That would mean admitting that she isn't as perfect as she likes to portray herself. SHE doesn't need any help/support/advise, it's the rest of us that need it - especially from her.

I've gotten a good laugh out of her myself... to be so pious, sanctimonious, and self righteous, yet contradicts herself every step of the way... sad, yet oh so funny.

belleboudeuse's picture

Submitted by belleboudeuse on Sat, 04/25/2009 - 9:29pm

It seems like people who don't have a lot of shame or a sense of what other people think of them, don't really have the ability to respond to sincere requests to treat others with respect.

Funny and sad at the same time.

BB

- You are not second best, you are not second class. Do not ever let anyone make you feel that way. (2Bloved)

Last Nerve's picture

Submitted by Last Nerve on Sat, 04/25/2009 - 9:38pm

And if she treats her husband and skids like she treats the people here, she's in for an awakening... The SD has been proudly banished, the SS will be next for some trivial reason, then the husband. He'll clue in eventually...
She's a trainwreck waiting to happen.

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Sat, 04/25/2009 - 9:18am

I don't know anything about ADD, but many people use the taking away of sports for failing grades. I think I actually agree with that decision. Not so much because it takes too much time, but because its a priviledge that should be taken away for bad grades. Among other things as well (video games, social events, etc) until the grades are back up. I think at 11 years old though, its still the parents responsibility to keep on top of their kids with their homework.

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

Angel37's picture

Submitted by Angel37 on Sat, 04/25/2009 - 9:40am

My 14 year old daughter received an F in one subject and I took away track, as well as the school dance and computer time. It's my belief that a child shouldn't participate in any activities until their grades are satisfactory. School comes first.

“Every truth has two sides; it is as well to look at both, before we commit ourselves to either”~Aesop

tryingtokeepthesanity's picture

Submitted by tryingtokeepthe... on Sat, 04/25/2009 - 10:36am

BM paints the perfect picture of a mother involved with her kids and isn't even home most of the time. Custody battles it comes down to everything. And I am sorry BM is going to let him do whatever he wants while he is grounded...he just can't go outside.

BM did bring him to pictures about 25 min late and I was able to get a picture with my BD10 and him together.

What's strange is she actually spoke to me. She stated that the grades on the report are incorrect and that the assignments were in SS11 backback and graded. She stated he is still not playing because she had already told him that he couldn't and trying to teach him the school is important. Funny, she started caring about all 2 of her kids AFTER she filed for custody.

I thought this site was for support. I guess I was wrong.

belleboudeuse's picture

Submitted by belleboudeuse on Sat, 04/25/2009 - 10:42am

Oh, gosh, Trying!! Melis wasn't telling YOU to get off your pedestal!!!! Please don't be offended. She was replying to another person's post. (Look back and you'll see it's a reply to someone else.)

This site is for support, and unfortunately we've had some drama on here lately. It's not about you at all.

HUGS!

BB

- You are not second best, you are not second class. Do not ever let anyone make you feel that way. (2Bloved)

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Sat, 04/25/2009 - 11:03am

Not at all! It was a response to TinaKay and her constant bashing of the posters here (this one - that many posters here like to play games) Sorry, I shouldve put her name on the title

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

melis070179's picture

Submitted by melis070179 on Sat, 04/25/2009 - 11:40am

Its probably not from this site, otherwise we'd all be having problems. I've had a virus like that before, where anything I opened it did that. If it doesn't let you go to antivirus websites like mcafee.com, its a bad one thats hard to get rid of! Good luck!

"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"

tryingtokeepthesanity's picture

Submitted by tryingtokeepthe... on Sun, 04/26/2009 - 9:05am

BM grounded SS11. He stayed at home with SS13...but took SS14 fishing all day....Hmm...I guess there was a good reason for missing the soccer game if she was spending time with her favorite child.

HummingBirdHunny's picture

Submitted by HummingBirdHunny on Sun, 04/26/2009 - 10:27am

I do feel that grades are very important, but having a child with ADHD is understandable in terms of getting them to run off all that energy. My husband and I have gone through tons of battles with BM who thinks that if the kids get C's that we shouldn't push them harder because "she" was a C student. I do believe it's best to push them to achieve the better grades. I believe they will benefit from it later on in life as well as be happy with the grades they are achieving.

I am so sorry that BM is playing favorites. I think that is the worst thing to do. I see that everyday with my kids when it concerns BM. She always shows more interest on so many levels with my SD than with SS. It's sad and I will admit it pisses me off. I have often times been told by my SS he feels BM loves his sister more than him. He told one of my best friends the same thing when he first met her!

If you guys aren't being informed of school grades right away then I would suggest that you call the school and tell them you want copies of EVERYTHING. If they refuse to follow your request bring court papers showing you have every LEGAL right to get that info.