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As I suspected, BM is invited to the In-Laws for Christmas

TryingSoHard's picture

SD is giving SO a hard time because he's not going to Christmas at his family's house. They've invited BM and still expect him to show up, like they are still "one big happy family." He will get the guilt trip for not showing up to Christmas, as if he doesn't have a good reason not to go. This is also partly another attempt to drive me away. But they're driving their own son away in the process.

I continue to get my feelings hurt by their behavior, but at this point you couldn't give me a thousand dollars to spend Christmas with those backstabbing emotional neanderthals. These people are dead to me.

I'm going to spend it at home, with friends, SO and my dogs. My dogs are more emotionally mature than my in laws. To Hell with those people. And a Merry Christmas too.

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stepmomto3bioto1's picture

:jawdrop: Oh tryingsohard, My heat totally goes out to you!! I am soooo sorry his family is acting like this towards you. It is utter disrespect, completly. They have major boundary issues. My in-laws have kinda done something like this as well. BM had pushed her nose into their lives as well. She even had my MIL watch her dog while her and her new hubby and the skids went on vacation this past summer!!! You have to understand, MIL & ALL of Dh's family has repeatedly told me how much they hate her!! Then my SIL started calling BM and acts all buddy buddy with her now too!! I just cannot believe it!
It is definitely NOT like BM had nobody else to watch her doggy, she has a ton of friends and family all of her own..but of course, BM searches for new reasons all the time to cause me and DH as many problems as she can.

This is a common problem in my marriage and in DH's family... they seem to ALL have major boundary issues, and they just do not care nor care to think of how anything might affect DH or I for that matter. DH's mom used to call me all the time, just to chat and talk. Several times a week. Well, since she talked to BM and watched the stupid dog, now MIL never calls me anymore to chat. Ive called her the last 15 times, and she talks to me a bit, like 5 minutes or so, and then tells me someone came over or someone else is calling her and she has to go..says she will call back..then doesnt.. DH says his mom is acting the same way towards him too....hmmmm...thank you BM and whatever the hell you did/said. You have to understand, DH & BM was in a very bitter custody battle up until Spring of this year...and then...all this?? Very weird to me..my family if they were still around (all my family has passed on to Heaven)would never ever think to cross these boundaries, and my Dad wouldve laughed at my Ex-husband if he ever even asked him such a thing...its all too weird.

Dont let them get to you!!! I know its hard, cause its got me down too...But..its their LOSS!! They will figure that out sooner or later on...