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How To Turn Your Wife Into An Evil Stepmother

TM9366's picture

Evil Stepmothers are not born that way. They don't marry and instantaneously turn evil, do they? Here are step-by-step instructions on "How to Turn Your Wife Into an Evil Stepmother". Found this article and thought "Yep, that'll do it."

How To Turn Your Wife Into An Evil Stepmother

Tips on what NOT to do in a stepfamily*
*Please note that this is meant to be informative in a humorous way, not to be taken sarcastically or meanly. In other words, these are things that a husband should take every precaution to AVOID if he wants a successful marriage. Always remember that in order to create an evil stepmom, you need to make sure that she feels like an outsider in her own home and that the more alienated she feels the quicker she will become evil. Also remember to create frustration and resentment because those are crucial ingredients for an evil stepmom.

1. Allow your child/children to have more of a say in household affairs than your wife. This method is so effective at turning your wife into an evil stepmother because you grant more power to your children than to your wife who is supposed to be your partner and equal. When you do this it will turn your children into your equal and your wife into the least valued member of the household.

An example of this would be if your wife has just finished decorating part of the living room and your child walks in and takes everything down and redecorates what your wife has just finished. It is effective if you pretend not see what your child has done, but it is far more effective if you yell at your wife for being upset. If you tell her that you only want your child to feel at home that will be a great way to tell your wife that you don't want HER to feel at home in her own home. You make her angry and resentful very quickly using this method.

Another example would be after spending a good amount of time planning a fun family outing for a Saturday with your wife, and after you tell your children about this outing and they say that they don't want to go that you go along with the kids. This communicates to your wife that your children rule the family and what she wants and plans means nothing to you. Keep pushing her down the totem pole and you are sure to have an evil stepmom in no time! There are many other ways to do this, we have only provided you with two examples.

2. Allow your children to disrespect her and make sure that they know that they don't have to do what she says. It is especially helpful if you can tell your wife that she knows nothing about disciplining children right in front of the children. Also helpful is if you argue with her and put her down in front of them. Some husbands find that it is beneficial to actually encourage the children to talk down to their wives.

When you do this, you ensure that the children will never listen to your wife and that she will be frustrated in almost no time. This will also give your children a tremendous sense of power, knowing that they can do whatever they want to this adult. This is also helpful for raising kids who disrespect their teachers and other adults. Remember, they look to you to see what they can get away with in how they treat your wife. If you don't treat her with respect and especially if you encourage them not to, they will really treat her bad and make her very resentful (one of the key ingredients to making an evil stepmom).

3. Don't discipline your children, let them run wild and watch your wife go crazy. Not only is it fun to watch her go crazy, but it fulfills your plan of making her into an evil stepmom! Pretend not to notice their behavior and wait to see how long it takes your wife to do something about it. This way, you don't have to be the bad guy who is disciplining your children AND your children are getting disciplined! Isn't that the best of both worlds?

It is even more helpful to hug and pamper the children, telling them how sorry you are that your mean wife disciplined them. Be sure that they know that your wife was out of line and mean. A very effective way to do this is to yell at your wife in front of the kids for the way that she disciplined them. This will frustrate your wife and make her discipline your kids even harsher the next time that they act up, making her look even worse. Which, of course, makes you look like more of a good guy! Your wife will resent you and your children but at least your kids are getting the discipline that you know they need and you come out looking like their hero.

4. Ignore your wife when your children are with you...or at least don't give her any kind of physical affection or attention. You wouldn't want to make your children jealous or show them that you love your wife. It is especially effective if you tell your wife point-blank that you are not going to give her any affection while your children are with you, that does a great job of making her mad and resentful. Some husbands find that they can turn their wives into evil stepmothers even quicker if they expect their wives to be affectionate with your children during this same time that you are denying her affection. Nothing like a good double standard to make her feel unimportant and unloved.

5. Expect your wife to love your children just as much as you do. Even though she has not had the time to bond with them that you have had. Demand that she tell them that she loves them and give them hugs and kisses. Certainly don't let them to forge a bond and a relationship on their own terms and in a time frame that feels comfortable for your kids and your wife. If you force her to love them that will make her uncomfortable and awkward not to mention resentful. An added bonus is to have a double standard and not expect your children to love or even be respectful of her (see number two).

6. Allow your ex-wife to have more of say in what goes on in your household than your wife does. This one is similar to number one, but involved your ex lover who doesn't even live in the house. This one can be even more effective than the first one if used correctly. You can make this happen in many different ways.

Every time that your ex calls, no matter what you are doing -- even having an intimate encounter with your wife -- be sure to answer the phone. You can't NOT talk to your ex, after all she IS the mother of your children. You should talk to her any time, day or night. This tells your wife that she is second and doesn't matter as much to you as your ex does. If your ex demands money, always give it to her no matter how stupid the reasoning is. If your ex's car breaks down be sure to rush over and fix it, again no matter what you may be doing with your wife.

Be sure to give your ex control over all kinds of decisions that go on in YOUR home, after all she is the mother of your children and your children stay with you. Let her dictate exactly how the children's clothes are to be washed. Take her advice on interior and exterior decorating, especially if what she suggests goes against what your wife wants.

If you and your wife are planning on getting a dog be sure to consult with your ex, and if she is afraid that a dog might bite one of the children tell your wife that there is no way that you guys are going to get a dog. Or even better, if your wife comes to the marriage with a cat or a dog and your ex thinks the animal could be dangerous throw a fit and order your wife to get rid of her pet. Your ex can threaten to raise the child support or to take you to court, you need to give her whatever she wants to keep her happy. Why would you want to keep your wife happy, the person that lives with you and that you promised to love and cherish?

Even bigger than a pet, if you and your wife are planning on having a baby together be sure to consult your ex about this. She might not feel good about the idea. She might be afraid that your children will be jealous or neglected because of this new baby. If your ex has any concerns, deny your wife the opportunity to have a baby. This is especially effective if your wife has no children of her own. You will definitely have a resentful, angry, evil stepmother in your home in no time. Be sure to throw in the fact that she should be happy and proud if YOUR children are the only children that she gets.

7. Insist that your wife take on all, or at least most, of the household chores, don't forget to have her clean your children's rooms as well. Don't do them yourself, you need to spend time with your children. Don't let them do any work around the house because if you do they might not think that your house is fun and they might tell your ex that they don't want to come over anymore. This is especially effective if you and your children are having a LOT of fun while your wife is doing housework, especially if she is picking up after you. Be sure to be loud when you and your kids are having fun, you want her to know what she is missing out on while she is washing the dinner dishes. Make certain that you and your children don't pick up your plates to take them to sink, it's the little things that speak volumes. If you want to be especially effective in this area, be certain to criticize all the housework that your wife does...and whatever you do, never ever praise her hard work or thank her for it.

8. Be sure to love up on your wife when your children are not home. Treat her like a princess, rub her back and do all the little things that you know she loves. This way, she is sure to feel the sting of you ignoring her when your children are home. She will resent their presence in your home and dread their arrivals which will of course lead to her being the evil stepmom that you want.

9. Talk about your past like it was the good old days, especially how much you miss those days. This works especially well when your children are with you because then you guys can talk about all kinds of events that your wife was not at, assuring that she will be left out of the conversation. But even when your children are not home you can tell your wife about all the great times that are long gone. Talk about how great things were with your children before your wife came along...and be sure to mention that you wish things weren't so stressful now. Don't forget to mention how worried you are about your children because of all the stress that they feel from your wife.

Some husbands even find it to be especially effective if they talk about their past with their ex a lot. If you decide to do this, be sure to talk about about the times with her in the best positive light. If she was your first love or a high school sweetheart it is beneficial to bring that up to your wife a lot. Nothing like reminding her of all the firsts that she missed out on in your life. If you have old pictures, that is even better.

10. Interfere when your children and your wife are having a dispute. You wouldn't want them to work it out on their own and build their relationship in the process. If you were to let them work out their disputes themselves they would be working together and you can't have that if you want your wife to be an evil stepmom. Be sure to jump right in on their fight and of course you want to take your children's side. They could stop seeing you as a hero if you stood up to them for your wife. To make sure that you remain in hero status, be sure to reprimand your wife for arguing with your children, and if you can throw in words like immature and mean that is especially helpful.

11. Blame all your children's bad qualities on your wife and take credit for all of their good qualities. This one works especially well if you have you have been following number three and seven and have your wife doing all the housework and disciplining of your children. You get the credit for all the good that they do simply because you supplied the DNA. Your wife gets blamed on their bad qualities because you have done such a good job at turning her into an evil stepmom and as a result she has treated your little angels so poorly. You get to come out the hero once again.

12. Give your wife all the childcare responsibilities and spend nearly no time with your children. Be sure that she is doing everything for the kids. Make sure that it is her responsibility to give the kids baths, get their homework done, get driven everywhere, and fed. This way you are ensured that she will be resentful. There are many husbands who find this method very effective for turning their wives into evil stepmoms. Maybe you are working, maybe you are taking care of the yard, maybe you are fixing the cars, whatever your heroic excuse is for not spending time with your children you will have your wife feeling unappreciated and misunderstood in no time. When you employ this method be sure that you spend as little time with your kids as possible, after all, why should you spend time with your own kids? Why would they want to spend time with you? Surely they come to your house just to spend time with your wife anyway. If you want to take this even further and assure your chances of turning your wife into an evil stepmother be sure to criticize everything that your wife did for your children while you were not there...and don't forget to make her feel bad for what she didn't do!

Now that you know these effective techniques to creating an evil stepmom, you are ready to start! You will have an angry, bitter and resentful wife in no time flat if you can follow all, or at least most, of the steps listed here. These are tried and true ways of turning wives into evil stepmothers. Good luck and enjoy your path to divorce court.

Comments

TM9366's picture

He used to not treat me badly. Just over the last 1.5 years or so is when it all changed, once SS20 moved out of his mom's, and SS10 started gaining weight and secluded himself in his room playing video games. I'm in the process of finding me a job so I can then make clearer decisions soon. Hoping I get one soon!

TM9366's picture

Also thought it would help out my friends who are going through some of the same stuff. And how else will DH see he's wrong on a few things? We've talked about a lot of that stuff, him never having my back, fighting in front of kids, etc. but nothing has changed, hoping this might give him an "a-ha" moment.

TM9366's picture

Plus he tells me all the time his kids hate me, and this entire article is exactly why, they've made me the "evil" stepmom, not me!

TM9366's picture

That's the point, my back is to the wall and at this point will do anything. I have tried talking to him, I am doing the "disengaging", I suggested counselor w/no reply, I'm trying to get a job so I can change things. Not sure there's anything left for me to do. And if you read it "was meant to be funny and facitious" (which kinda was). I didn't specifically point fingers at anybody, but if the shoe fits.... I'm at my wits end, desperate times call for desperate measures. I feel like a prisoner in my own home when SS is around. This week really sent me over the edge, DH having SS11 over all week for spring break, without consulting w/me, and all while he had to work all week and left SS with me.

SilverPetra's picture

This article. So. Much. Thanks for posting.....I'm going to save the link to the original, after googling it. If things get ropey again, I'm going to message my wife privately with this.

TM9366's picture

Yes, I thought it's worthy for both spouses to read. Especially the one that is alienating the other, so to speak. [But just not sure how I can get DH to read it.] I just found it the other day because I've been having issues with SS11 and DH, and I have started to "disengage". It actually helped me see that I'm not the crazy or evil or wicked stepmom they claim me to be; that in fact, they turned me into her.
....Although I am immature according to a few on here. Glad this could help others though.

TM9366's picture

Sad thing is, is that I'd never ever think, in my 46 years, that I'd be this person. I like kids, they like me. Never had any issues of getting along w/any other kids ever before. And I hate that is now my label. Once someone is labeled and known as an Evil Stepmom or Wicked Stepmother, can that title ever be reversed? I hope it can.

FrenchPeas's picture

Oh I was terrible it's still spouted about town by the idiot ex that I "hated his children". Effe them and who cares? They are all psychos that deserve one another. Hell, I called myself Maleficent. You know. The skids were so sweet. Made my heart sing to be jumped all over and grabbed by XOSS. And watch him scream in my daughter's face as well. But you know. I over reacted. All the damn time. That incident was no different. I over reacted again! Silly me. Besides. After all the utter hell they all dragged me through, my kids were worse. My 11 year old so. Had the audacity to eat a chicken strip while standing on the carpet. Yes, that is so horrible. How dare he? It was so upsetting, it still - two years later - brings exh such turmoil.

Effe them. My life is so much better with them out of it. Goodbye, losers. I'm happy to be that evil step mother. Lmao

Bates Motel's picture

This applies both ways. Just substitute the word husband for wife. Fortunately for me, the ex is not in the picture, at least I don't have to suffer this indignity. I have also begun to realize that SS14 may never move out. I have been hoping to get a reprieve in 4 years when he goes to college, when I only have to endure his presence on occasional visits. But now I am realizing that I am in danger of having my DW allow him to come back to stay after that, to live in the "mama hotel" until he is 30, when he will be exactly what he is now, but older.

Bates Motel's picture

This applies both ways. Just substitute the word husband for wife. Fortunately for me, the ex is not in the picture, at least I don't have to suffer this indignity. I have also begun to realize that SS14 may never move out. I have been hoping to get a reprieve in 4 years when he goes to college, when I only have to endure his presence on occasional visits. But now I am realizing that I am in danger of having my DW allow him to come back to stay after that, to live in the "mama hotel" until he is 30, when he will be exactly what he is now, but older.

Amcc13's picture

I an sorry that you are going through such a difficult time at home. I agree the best thing to do is to get a job so you can make more decisions with a clear head and without fear. Honestly I think you have done all you can and perhaps you have made the decision and just need the job to finish things off.
I am glad you took the thing off Facebook I find that even though you were innocent and the one treated badly something like that can change the tide and make the children seem like the ones being victimised. I believe you have been through enough without being tarnished long term by Facebook post.
Now on your post here it says you have started disengaging. Please read up on disengaging and stop doing everything for these people. They don't deserve it. Let them stew in their filth cook their own meals etc. Send out CVs, find a job, focus on you.

frustratedmom_2021's picture

Thank you for sharing this, I believe this is a reason most stepmothers fail no matter how hard they try.