Well That Didn't Last Long
The struggle for the kitchen turf is back on! Only 5 months into my semi retirement, getting the kitchen organized, cleaned, FIFOed and meals based on weekly specials, little waste/ cooking for two only, etc, Chef announces he doesn't like his meals this way and wants to go back to channeling his father who would overbuy and cook for their huge family. Making a terrible mess of the kitchen in the process and wasting scads of food. His father was also a hoarder.
He wants to have huge portions of pasta almost every day as well. He has high BP and has put back on almost all his weight from losing it from fasting a couple years back. Although he denies this. His only saving grace is his physical job of contractor.
He retrieved the giant aluminum roasting pan which covered the entire bottom of my full sized convection/dual fuel oven. So large I was using it as a water/steam pan when I make my baguettes!
He got angry and said "THIS IS A ROASTING PAN!" I showed him the many other smaller broiler/roasting pans to use and he absolutely refused it to roast off a bag of brussel sprouts.
I have a small frying pan sitting on my counter half full of EVOO for his Aglio E Olio!! GRRRR!
He told me I do "ok" cooking large holiday meals but day to day dinner "isn't my thing!!!" I notice he had no problem scarfing down my dinners and going for seconds so far!
I've also been cooking food I like as well not just Chef's everyday whims/cravings.
And no he would never go to therapy as he is practically perfect in every way... everyone else is flawed (roll eyes).
Arrrgghhhh!
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Ooofff..that's tough
but why after 5 months has he suddently got a bur up his butt. Seems like it was going good..he didn't have to cook, etc. It appears that there is something more going on with this but I get the "I don't do therapy". DH was the same exact way....course he is all for it now since it kept him from haivng to date in 50's.
Sorry that sounds so very frustrating...
Possibly
The knowledge of OSS buying a house without his advice (we both advised Awesomeson on his house purchase and he did very well) Plus the CS COLA announcement might have put him over the edge (it doesn't take much) however he was an ass last weekend as well. Maybe he actually thought the PAS would unfreeze and OSS would make an attempt to contact him about his house purchase. Which frankly is living in fantasy land.
I manage TWO smart phones (his biz and the rental-- I don't forward calls from the rental phone to the biz phone with google voice because It's just too easy to slip up and our personal number would be known).
I asked him to hold one of them for a second while I drove my zero turn mower up on to the small tip trailer when finished mowing at the rentals. He evidently put my phone on top of his truck and took off. It wasn't until we were twenty five minutes away when I noticed the phone was MIA.
Thank goodness for the Life360 app! The phone had flown off his pickup truck and onto the road back at the rental properties. I drove back in my car to retrieve the phone and fortunately it wasn't damaged.
He immediately started blaming me and turning it around. He stated he has too much to keep track of with his own phone and all the rehab projects to hold on to my phone for 2 minutes!
Excuse me, I have to keep track of 2 physical phones and do all the record keeping, advertising, interviewing, bookkeeping and taxes for both businesses as well as all household duties, pet care, lawn and garden maintenance; this while working full time + as well up until last November.
He got nasty and belligerent and then we both gave each other the silent treatment. He apologized the next day. He rarely apologizes. Maybe twice in nineteen years; he has a very short fuse.
Oh boy. DH!
Oh boy. DH!
My DH occasionallyseeks kudos for cleaning up the kitchen. Which was his mess in the first place or was a result of my cooking/his cleanup process anyway. Then he'll get pouty and tell me what he did. "Oh, ok DH, do you want me to list everything I did today so you can thank me...really?" Which results in a quiet "Nooooo."
Nothing worse than cooking
Nothing worse than cooking and having people bitch about it.
Yes
There are a few things that I like that Chef doesn't care for but I don't cook those all the time. I couldn't stand when he made chicken alfredo. But I never bitched about it except once.
The one time I did because he was actually using jarred alfredo sauce, which is awful, he blew a gasket. I don't even like it when it is made from scratch. I don't mind spicy shrimp alfredo Which he loves but I only like in very measured doses.
Remember it’s air conditioning
Season. DS. Air conditioner must need service. Or better still a hold system. You know unless DS or DIL stop Chef from coming to there home he going to set up a DYI home renavation on DS home
Awesomeson and DIL
Live about two hours away from us so they don't call us when they need something they Have called for some advice in the past. But unlike chef's family they aren't looking for something for nothing
This could be us with our
This could be us with our business and cooking (except I handle about 85% of the business, buy ten of everything, keep a clean kitchen, use the smallest pans possible, and cook to my whims haha). Sometimes it's hard being around your husband 24/7.
Yes, this would definitely
Yes, this would definitely drive me crazy! That is one good thing about my DH as he lets me handle the kitchen and eats everything I make without complaint. In fact, he's very good at praising me for what I make.
Ironically, I've been doing the same thing as you I've been going through the kitchen covered by cupboard and organizing cleaning and getting rid of things, breaking out new pots and pans, etc.. I love it.
We have gone from DH doing
We have gone from DH doing most of the cookin to me doing most of the cooking. DH is a good cook, but he cooks for 20 instead of 2 and leftovers go to waste. We still waste too much food but I am going to revisit meal planning once I retire this summer. I'm looking forward to it.
I'm also going to get rid of all the kitchen stuff we never use -- I can't stand single-use items and I don't need three giant crock pots. I will hear some of the same stuff you are. I'm willing to keep some of the stuff we never use because "but but but I might need that sometime"--it just can't be in Kitchen Central.
I have been doing "Swedish
I have been doing "Swedish death cleaning' basically getting rid of and organizing your stuff so your kids don't have to. I started in the kitchen, got rid of duplicates. Threw away 4 or 5 out of 12 spatulas and an old garlic press. You would have thought I murdered his dog. He is over the spatulas, but will never be over the garlic press, even though I bought him a fancy one for our anniversay!
OMG! I had never heard of
OMG! I had never heard of thsi and just this morning my brother posted on FB about it! Too funny! I guess Ive been doingthe same thing only its in preperation for if and when I move out. Making less stuff for me to go through at the very end.
Same concept. I have gotten
Same concept. I have gotten rid of so much stuff. Now when I want to use a special bowl or tray I can open the door and grab it. I used to have to move this pile of plates, then the box of silverware, then some bowls, to get at what I wanted. I gave some to the DILs, donated most of it and I am trying to document the rest, making an album for the kids so they know the history of different items and if they are valuable. I actually stumbled on these candlesticks my SM gave me. They were chunky and this dull ugly yellow color. I was going to toss them but decided to look them up. They are from the 1850s and are made from uranium glass and they glow under black light! I have them on the mantle with a light and they are very cool!
When my husbands cooks or
When my husbands cooks or cleans or does the laundry, he always makes sure I have a ton of dishes to wash and a ruined kitchen (he wont do the dishes, thats his pet peeve), a mop left on the floor with half an area mopped, a load of smelly laundry left in the washer for 3days and never put in the dryer, clothes piled up in every corner of the house
Needless to say, his help is actually more work if anything else. My husband is ADHD so it will never be properly resolved....He feels overwhelmed doing multiple tasks and simply stops in the middle of them to go finish a hobby or talk on the phone with a friend or go to the store and its never finished
My advice to you is to reduce the amount of utensils in the kitchen. For example, the big roasting pan can be donated or hidden in a storage space for holidays only. Go through the kitchen and get rid of stuff and/or stash it away. This will reduce the excessive use of dishes while cooking. For food, if he makes big amounts then tell him that he is not allowed to cook for the next two days and must eat leftovers.
I suspect your husband may have some type of ADHD like mine. In this case, there is nothing you can do because one of the traits of ADHD is literally opposing what you are told!
He makes it a point
To look for the stuff I've hidden. I've started getting rid of stuff too that he never uses. He has a lot of his NFL fav sports team stuff but since he no longer follows the games anymore, I've started to donate stuff. He actually had an NFL teddy bear which was missing one arm given to him by Battleaxe Galactica. That went out in the garbage 2 weeka ago. He still has Pumpkinhead's baby blanket with same NFL team's logo stored away in a top shelf. So tempted to get rid of that!!! And the NFL helmet given to him by his estranged brother, Uncle Kinky, who took the Girhippo's side in the divorce.
I can't STAND clothes left to sour in the washer!!! The Girhippo did this ALL.THE.TIME and caused the three ferals to wreak even more than they usually did. He would excuse it by saying "that's the way the Girhippo does laundry."
She wouldn't rewash the laundry either. Just dump it in the dryer to bake the stench in. MOTY!
WRONG!!!!!
SO is perfect too!! I snapped
SO is perfect too!! I snapped on him the other day. I've been upping my martini game and went out and got stuff for almond joy martinis.... I have them allllll most perfect haha.
Anyways.. the alcohol was $100 and I bought choco syrup for the glasses. The original one I bought was more for ice cream so I was like meh I'll just get some Hersheys. HE! Hid it from SS18 because HE said that if he sees it he will drink a gallon of milk a day... which is true.
Few days later I was looking for it.. wanted a martini.. claimed I must have put it somewhere.
LISTEN HERE MOTHER FER (haha) I said no!! You f'n hid it from SS18. Don't EVEN try to say it was me!
He struggles with seeing himself with stuff like that and I just can't. I've been high stung with other things going on and he wasn't really supportive as I think he should have been.. so he really set me off.
Almond Joy Martinis
Recipe?
Yum! Do you use DiSaronno and
Yum! Do you use DiSaronno and Godiva Chocolate Liqueur?
1oz vodka
1oz vodka
1oz coconut rum
.5oz frangelico
.5oz chocolate liquor... Godiva doesn't make theirs anymore according to the liquor store near my house. The one I bought works perfect though!
1oz whole milk and a splash of my Coffeemate sweet bliss creamer. This i might change to whipping cream.
I also did a tablespoon of cream of coconut.
Chocolate syrup in the glass and pour. These were my best ones yet.
Thanks for sharing! I make
Thanks for sharing! I make mine with DiSaronno instead of Frangelico.
Whatever will I do when the Godiva runs out?! *unknw*
Instead of letting his glutton meals rot in the fridge, just
throw away the excess when it is served. I have learned that with few exceptions, left overs just cause our fridge to reek and we end up freezing it before tossing it on garbage day.
See what he says about you scraping the too much stuff into the garbage from your plate before dinner.
On the night he cooks.