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I'ts Not Just Skids--Seems Like It's "Modern" Parenting (rather the lack of it)

thinkthrice's picture

Next door to me live a thirty-something couple. Mom works part to full time. Dad works full time. A "nuclear" family with one son, if you will. Mom coddles her only son. The couple has somewhat of a rocky relationship--they argue quite frequently. Mom generally backs down; an affable woman who has a nervous giggle and where nothing her child does bothers her.

No expectations are made for this child. He is developmentally stunted by the mom and somewhat by the dad.

The 9 year old kid routinely screams and shreiks out loud just to hear the sound of his own voice. Mom NEVER tells him to "cut it out" like we used to be told in the good ol' days.

He came bounding down the driveway, flailing his arms for no apparent reason right off the school bus yesterday. I happened to have gone home early to take care of a few errands. The kid interrupts a convo his father was having with another adult

Dad: "What is it buddy?"

Kid: "I used to be a-scared of my bike but since I went to the bike rodeo, I'm not a-scared anymore"

(me: ok, sounds a lot like what YSS used to do; butt into adult conversations with inane chatter just to get attention)

Dad: "That's gooooood buddy!"

(me: eye roll)

Kid drops his bookbag on the grass and walks toward the house, raring to get at the vid games. This kid RARELY goes outside and plays and is getting the classic chubby vid game kid look.
Dad tries to get kid's attention "Hey buddy, bring in your bookbag since you're going inside"

Kid COMPLETELY ignores dad although well within earshot and continues walking not even turning around or acknowledging dad.

Dad picks up kid's bookbag and kind of nervously chuckles as if to say "kids will be kids."

(me: eye roll)

Then kid comes bolting back out INSISTING that dad drop what he's doing and ride his bike with him.

What the HELL is wrong with parents these days not correcting their children and teaching them social skills, manners and graces???!!

Comments

Willow2010's picture

The 9 year old kid routinely screams and shreiks out loud
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
There is a kid across the street that does this all the time. Makes me want to go slap the crap out of her. (kidding) (kind of).

She can be playing all be herself and just raise her head and SCREAM at the top of her lungs and then look back down and start playing again. UGH.

And her parents spoil those kids crazy too.

Example...They had a tree fall down in their FRONT yard a few weeks ago. My DH went over and sliced it up with his chain saw. The Dad came to thank him that afternoon...this is the convo....

Man: Thanks for slicing the tree up. It will make it easier to haul to the road for heavy pick up. (tree was MAYBE 20ft from road)
DH: No problem.
Man: is going to take me forever to get it all to the road because I have a bad back.
DH: :jawdrop: . Get those three strapping boys of yours to drag it all out. won't take them long at all.
Man: They won't do it even if I ask.
DH: :jawdrop: Well good luck then.

I was floored. These boys are like 16, 15 and 12. Would have taken them less than an hour to get it all to the road. I saw the stupid dad drag a little bit out there every other day after he got off work but he never had those boys help him at all. I don't know too many people like him, but that is crazy!

thinkthrice's picture

Oh yeah I have run into this time and time again. I went blueberry picking last year. The owner of the blueberries said to me that he had so much work and maintenance to do on the blueberries. And here's the kicker;

He had teenage children who REFUSED to help him with the blueberries. REFUSED??? Are you KIDDING ME??!

If i had EVER even THOUGHT of REFUSING ANYTHING my parents or grandparents told me (outside of armed robbery) I wouldn't have been able to sit down for a few weeks!!

Pilgrim Soul's picture

"The thing that impresses me most about America is the way parents obey their children."

Edward VIII, King of England (abdicated in 1936 to marry Wallis Simpson;
may be he wasn't so smart after all... )

Booqueen's picture

Ain't just America, mate. It's the general parenting style these days. Kids get away with everything which I find completely bewildering because it is my generation that are bringing up these kids and we were NEVER allowed to get away with things like these. How in the world is it that if we were brought up to help around the house, we are bringing up children who are so lazy and sit around expecting to have everything done for them?