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I am a worry wart!

svillemomof4's picture

I am driving my husband crazy but that isn't anything new Blum 3 I worry, a lot, about our children. More so about our oldest children. I have gotten very bad about it recently, I think it has something to do with our 19yr old being pregnant. I am trying not to pry and trying to remember how worn down you can get while growing another human life inside of you but I worry when we don't hear from her for two weeks. We know she is ok because we talk to the eldest who see's her sister almost daily, they work at the same place just different shifts. I just wish I didn't have to get my updates from another child. My husband says no news is good news and while I do agree most of the time with that things are different now, we have a grandbaby coming. I want to be sure SD19 has what she needs, is feeling well, is happy, etc. But I am trying to hold back, not crowd her because I know hormones are raging!
After two weeks I got a text saying she is sorry she hasn't gotten to talk to us in a bit and wanted to know how I am. I responded telling her no worries, I know she has so much on her plate and how exhausting being pregnant can be. I asked about her and the baby, about school and work. I haven't heard back. That was four hours ago. Of course she could be at work again and busy, they stay pretty busy. I am not going to text until this eveing, not again, and only a text saying "did you get my reply".
I fear the BM is giving SD19 a hard time about me and her father. We have done a lot for her and the baby, a new deluxe swing, a crib, lots of baby clothes, and almost her entire materninty wardrobe including a bathing suit since she isn't due until July! I even got her a sexy red dress that will be so pretty for her shower. BM got angry about the swing, started talking bad about us, how can we afford to do this but not that (paying for their car payments/cell phones is what the not that is). I'm sorry, SD's are grown, moved out of our home by the coaxing of BM and we have always said to all four kids that once you leave the nest do not expect anything from us. We are open about that. We tell them to stay for as long as they want, nobody was pushed out, they could stay forever for all we care. But once they left we stopped the financial support we were giving, that is why I won't pay car payments or cell phone bills, nothing to do with my situation, that is what they chose to do when they left.
I know BM hates me, I don't much care these days. I have a grandson to look forward to. I have a SD that is going to need me and DH because BM is a slacker. I have SD21 that I worry about a lot more now that she has moved in with her BF and his parents. I have two young children at home that still depend on me and DH for everything. I have an ex who just lost his father, my daughter lost her grandfather, and is taking care of his mother now and I worry about them. And now I have two guinea pigs added to our family who I adore and must take care of Smile I just love the cute girls! I have too much going on in my life to care if she hates me.
Well, hopefully I will hear back from SD19 today. And hopefully this has nothing to do with anything other than the poor kid is worn out. I just have to keep my worry in check and not let them know. I know they know but they don't know. Know what I mean? LOL! Wink

Comments

Kes's picture

I am a worrier too, so I know it is no use to you to tell you not to worry! But I have a similar problem sometimes with my adult DDs not contacting me. It is me who makes most of the running, especially with the younger one. My elder DD30, is expecting her second baby in May, and I worry! But she is healthy and competent, I know there is no reason to do so, and try to tell myself that.

I trust your 19year old's preganancy proceeds uneventfully!

Like you - I have a BM who hates me - now THAT - I do NOT worry about, one jot! Blum 3