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Pervy Grandpa

Shieldmaiden's picture

Just some interesting things that happened lately. I am SM to 3 SD's, the oldest is 21 and lives on her own. I don't talk to her but she occcasionally calls DH to chat.

I overheard some of the last conversation of SD21 and DH. She was asking about their grandmother's second husband. He has always been outgoing, good looking, athletic, and EAGER to help take the kids off BM's hands -which she loved. She often took advantage of his offers during after the divorce, having him ferry her 3 daughters off to softball practice, friends houses, etc. This always struck me as odd, because he was in his 80's and seemed like he might not want to sit in traffic with a bunch of yammering preteens at his age, but he always eagerly volunteered. I got creepy vibes off him and didn't want him near the kids or in my house, but DH and BM were too busy fighting over the kids to care about who watched over them. Typical. 

So now SD21 calls out of the blue to ask DH why grandpa's best friend wasn't allowed to come over anymore. ( I didn't think she even remembered that guy). DH says friend was banished because he was a pedophile and kept hiding in the poolhouse while the sd's changed out of their bathing suits. He also caught this guy ogling middle child SD when she was 4 and swimming in grandpa's pool. Dh was the only one to notice this behavior. Grandpa got angry with DH back then because he was "being rude to his friend." 

I asked why the sudden interest in pervy grandpa and pervy grandpa's friend? He didn't know. I have long suspected that grandpa is a pedo and that is why middle child acts like she has sexual abuse trauma and is wierd about adults drinking around her, (even one beer) and other odd fears she has. I wonder if oldest SD is remembering past trauma and looking into it? I remembered my past sexual abuse when I was in my twenties, so it stands to reason. Also, middle SD found some old family video tapes showing grandpa driving around young girls (cousins, etc) in his motorhome back in the day. This guy cultivates a yard, pool, motorhome, that is very appealing to kids, but I've always seen right through him and seen his predator-face under that "good guy" mask.

It should be interesting to see if SD calling out grandpa for abuse will help her sisters finally heal from all the twisted family dynamics. I personally would love to see this skeezy old man get outed for who he really is. Every time he popped up on my doorstep I wanted to punch him in his smug face. I have never reacted to anyone this way before, but he makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up. Anyone else have a BM relative that strikes them as off?


The_Upgrade's picture

Nope but my friend had a creepy uncle by marriage. He was married to my friend's aunt. During family gatherings he always hung around us with the excuse that we spoke English better (he married into a non English speaking family). And it was weird hearing teen phrases pop out of his old mouth. Like he's trying so hard to fit in. As far as I know he was never caught doing anything but if you got too close he'd always find an excuse to initiate casual touch that could be shrugged off as nothing creepy - despite the hairs standing on the back of your neck.

Yesterdays's picture

Yes the initiating casual touch. When I was a kid I remember men who acted that way, they make it seem accidental. Or always wanting to hug.

Men on the city bus that act that way too, sit too close, etc. It's gross 

CLove's picture

Has little to no family and esp not nearby.

Husband has an older brother that SD23 Feral Forger accused of abusing her and being pervy. I like the guy, and when it came up I asked SD 16.5 PS if she had any experiences with this uncle or any bad feelings and she said "no not at all".

Its good that the SDs are working through things. Trusting instincts and powering through these difficult and damaging experiences will benefit them, and hopefully you.

Rags's picture

Just as those who would falsely accuse someone who is innocent should be eleminated.

I put those two categories of POS people in the same bucket and they should be subject to equal consequences.  Actually , the one who falsely accuses should be subject to additional and more extensive consequences since their actions ruin the lives of innocents for some benefit to the one fraudulently accusing.

In mates will likely eleminate the molestor and sadly the falsely accused as well.

IMHO of course.