It's basically the husband, not the stepkids
Hello, everybody! I have decided, that for me, it's not the stepkids-it's my husband. They are adults and he gives in to one of his daughters the most. She is the only one who has anything to do with him. She has some quackery beliefs about essential oils, energy, alternative health, and spiritual beliefs. When he's with me, he agrees its quackery. When he's with her he agrees and enables and participates in it all. So, I can't blame the step- daughter. He is the wishy washy chameleon.
The step kids will act toward you however the Dad has taught or allowed them. He is the key. Right now, I love my husband, but I don't like him very much.
Not feeling very Rosie
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It usually is. The trick is
It usually is. The trick is to either accept how that is going to be or to try to get him to see it and hope that he'll change his behavior.
99.5 percent of all problems
99.5 percent of all problems on this site are due to the DH.
Yep I agree! Yeah the skids
Yep I agree!
Yeah the skids are assholes and the way they live their life is different from me, but its my DH who is "accepting" of that behavior and excepts me to be okay with them and their behavior that causes the issues.
I dont have to deal with the skids. I do have to deal with DH. I have gotten good at stopping DH from making me deal with the skids and their b.s.
I would say 99.5% of the
I would say 99.5% of the problems on this site are due to the PARENTS in general not just dad. My wife and I have loser ex's who are horrible parents, yet her and I can keep our 6 kids doing well in school and out of trouble DESPITE their bio parents. If you work with and trust in your partner, most of these problems go away. Are there bumps in the road? Of course! Does it take time and patience? Doesn't all parenting????
Reading this site depresses me and makes me glad I have the Skids, bio-kids and wife that I do have.
My SS(24) is like that and
My SS(24) is like that and has been since I met him. It took a bit to figure it out but he basically agrees with whichever parent he's talking to at the moment. He hates conflict and doesn't want to disappoint anyone. I think it's typical of children of divorce. He doesn't seem to do it with his friends, only his parents.
When DH moved in with me SS could have had his apartment (there was a lease) He was excited to move into it, then DH gets a text from BM saying no, he wants to stay at home with her. When SS was confronted he still played both sides, said he really wanted to move in to us and no he didn't want to at all to BM. I'm not sure what he would have done if everyone had been in the same room? His head might have exploded!
In the end he didn't take the apartment because we were able to break the lease at no cost and he left for college sooner than expected.
Dr's and big pharma are
Dr's and big pharma are bigger quacks than natural medicine. My wife and I are into that as well.
There are "natural
There are "natural alternatives" and then there's downright quackery. Please do not confuse the two.
I worked with a woman who called her "doctor" (500 miles away)so he could diagnose her problems by her putting her phone on different parts of her body. And then he gave her advice that she was allergic to broccoli and should avoid it. Or that her problems would be solved by swinging a crystal 3 times and having someone tap her on the back 4 times (yes I got rooked into that little charade). Her chiropractor claimed that she could cure AIDS (1992) by spinal manipulations.
I'm sorry but that is quackery. And it's insulting to real acupuncturists, chiropractors and other trained purveyors of homeopathic care.
"Be sure to put it on vibrate
"Be sure to put it on vibrate and I will call you right back."
"Put it on vibrate but leave
"Put it on vibrate but leave the connection open so I can listen to your reaction."
Well, my DH and I are into
Well, my DH and I are into essential oils and everything else you mentioned but that's not really what your post is about.
If your DH really does not believe in it, then he can either say so or not say anything, but to pretend to agree with her is unnecessary. There is nothing wrong with disagreeing. Can't he just have an honest conversation with her? Maybe they can learn something about each other. Maybe if he was honest, he could have a real relationship with her.
I can't even imagine my dad pretending to believe in something to appease me. Wouldn't happen.
DH? Nope. He will not pretend to be something he is not to his daughter.