Seriously, Why are these guys so highly sensitive about their kids?
I just don't get it. I have no problem hearing what he has to say about mine, but say one word about his and all hell breaks loose! Why do you all think that is?
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I saw that. Too funny. But
I saw that. Too funny. But seriously I just don't understand it. I don't know, maybe there are BMs like that too, I just don't happen to be one of them. I will tell anyone in a heartbeat that my children can be complete terrors at times.
Sperm creations....A.Deville
Sperm creations....A.Deville tied it all together!!!!
From my post earlier this was discovered....
Really if you think about it maybe thats EXACTLY what it is. Men are ultra sensitive about their kids.
Their sperm created the kid.
Their willys are connected to their sperm.
You know how men are about their willys.
Maybe they think you have a problem with their willy if you have a problem with their kid.
i have yet to figure it out!
i have yet to figure it out! i mean when i am told that my dd3 has done something i really wish she wouldnt have like push my nephew...i dont tell my mom NO SHE DIDNT and get all mad...i know my child is not perfect i love her anyway, i know she will make mistakes in life, we all do. i dont get why some people act like their children are perfect angels...they are kids, they like to push buttons and see how much they can get away with. its going to happen. i just wish some people would open their eyes!
i have the same problem
i have the same problem because if i say anything i get my head bit off before i finish the sentence but an hour later Dh will be complaining about almost the exact same thing and i just look at him with this WTF did you just say....i was super bitch when i said that an hour ago look.
my mom will be the first to tell you i was a total pain in the ass to deal with growing up, but what i don't understand is when people go through a divorce are they tryign to sheild the kids into thinking there is nothing wrong with them to have caused the split??? so the second you harp on them for something they're doing or saying it's US that gets yelled at for attacking Junior.
My DH is the same way,I have
My DH is the same way,I have reminded him that also when it comes to my kids.This is what I think for my DH he has not spend real father to son time since SS3 was 3mos old so there for, when I mention something about SS3 he states "There is nothing we can do until we get more time with him than we can focus on that". Which in a way DH is right I think he has spend more time with my kids since, than his own and we have been together for 1 1/2 yrs. So bottom line I believe that the DH'S that get real sensative about there kids is that unfortunely thay have not been able to raise there child in way they believe would be appropriate for them and they have not been able to be there for them in so many ways so they might feel even some guilt and the only way they can fill in that gap is to almost in a way protect them when DH'S feel someone is almost like picking on them even if that is not the case. I hope this makes some sense helps out in some way.
I think a lot of people in a
I think a lot of people in a divorce/remarriage situations are sensitive about their children. I am about my DS just as much as DH is about his kids. We KNOW their goof-ups, but we sure as crap don't want to hear about them, and certainly not from each other.
I on the other hand do want
I on the other hand do want to hear if he is having a problem with something my children are doing in our house. I don't want him to have to put on a happy face if something is bugging him. I want to get to the root of the problem and attempt to fix it so we can move on. I would like him to do the same or at least attempt to do the same if I have a problem with his kids.
True, and I think a lot of it
True, and I think a lot of it might have to do with the way things are said as well. If DH says, *** won't EVER do blah blah blah.... then I immediately get defensive but if he says, could you mention to *** or remind *** that it would be helpful for him to do whatever, then I think oh yes, ok! There is so much to be said for HOW you say things to your SO about their kids!
so instead of raising them
so instead of raising them the way you would have liked to had there not have been the split you (the bios of the world) do absolutely nothing and sheild your (again bio) eyes from anything negative or undesirable that the kids do. total bullshit in my book!!
is that it - does it go back
is that it - does it go back to they don't want to fight with them for the short time they're together?? instead of calling skids out on their bad behavior/mannerisms it's easier to target the stepparents out as being the bully to the perfect kid????? fkn wonderful.
Exactly! We parent our kids
Exactly! We parent our kids but these dh's don't. They are afraid to parent their own kids and i believe on some level they know that; however they seem to be able to suppress that knowledge until some kindly sm comes along and points out some problems with the little angel and it reminds these dh's of what they already know. They do not parent their children and they are permanently damaging them-but hey, it's easier that way.
"Their kid is an extension of
"Their kid is an extension of themselves and see it as a bad mark against them?"
I know this is true for my H. Highlighting SK's bad behavior is the same as calling him a "BAD parent".
"As a mother I think I was
"As a mother I think I was more on guard and defensive about physical harm coming to my children. " That creepy looking guy had best not set one eyeball on my child", "wear your helmet if you ride your bike" "Don't run in the house you might get hurt" If a seemingly reasonable person said my kid did something naughty I confronted said kid to get their story and then I opened the can of mamma whoop ass."
EXACTLY! That's me too!
I see no problem with
I see no problem with this!!!! GO live with your lazyass BM and her dirty flea ridden house and leave my clean sanatized home alone!!! they'll see the light eventually and if not the skids are saving me a hell of a lot of sanity and clean up time!!!! If only the CS would stop when their visits stopped
I agree I feel bad for DH
I agree I feel bad for DH sometimes I understand where they are coming from but when ever SS3 starts throwing a tantrum because my own child is playing with a toy SS3 was not playing with in 1st place. Guess what I call DH and I have him get his attention and deal with it I will not be the wicked SM I explain to SS3 one time he does not listen I have DH deal with him. That is all I can do and that way DH understands what SS3 does and that in any circumstance when ever a child is misbehaving a parent needs redirect them.