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BM goes on summer cruise once again while DH and (mostly) I have to babysit

newmom01's picture

I know long time no see....it has been a while...here is my complaint

This sucks and yes im kind of jealous....How in the world can you afford to go on a trip every year while we have to babysity your kids and our two toddlers 1 & 2?

This is not fair I already hardly have any time to myself as it is... I work full time mon-fri then cook dinner for my hubby and our toddlers we bathe them put them to bed. and then dh goes of to work (goes in at night gets off in mornings) which is why im a little pissed. I have to "BEG, & sound alarms" for the ss's to get up and although they can dress themselves 10 and 9 the move slow then tend to fall back into bed.... Either way dh says "All you have to do is get them up and just dress the babies and the the babies diaper bag and lunches ready for daycare. Then drop babies off at daycare THEN drop the boys off at my moms houe (have to pass it to get to my job) then work all day then stop and pick them up dh will go get our kids from daycare then cook (enough) because ss's eat like grown men ...then make sure everbody gets baths and get into bed while dh goes to work!

And pray that they dont get up in the middle of the night and sneak downstatirs and get into snacks......

I know alot of you have it harder because your sk's stay with you full time, but i just cant help getting upset about this I have two kids (babies) to take care of I dont need 2 additional kids!

Comments

newmom01's picture

Yep ....sounds like my mom... Wink

I tell him look im tired and now have two additional kids...then he comes bac with the "All you have to do is...."

If i say no then we get into this big huge argument....been doing this for quite a while now (been married a few years) Then bm will start screaming at him "you said you would" "its too late now, we have tickets" "You knew about this months in advance...... I dont know how the ex-wife knows just what buttons to push to get him to do what she wants him to and im still trying to figure it out....that really pisses me off!

I dont care about them coming over every other week anymore, because i just say im going to the store and stay gone for a while to see a movie or go shopping. You wanted them hee so you watch them! (all of them) !

And Im that way because ....his work hours are so funky that when he gets off on saturday mornings he runs and picks them up then comes home and wants to sleep while I watch all 4 kids! hell no leave their ass at they house till you get some rest then you get them!

Purplemom's picture

If he is coming in in the AM why doesn't he get the Skids up and to his mom's before he goes to bed?

They are HIS KIDS and it is HIS responsibility to get them fom a to b.. why the hell does he get to sleep and leave you to wrangle all 4 of them on your way to work? Let the skids sleep and he takes them over later or he needs to get them up early and take them to his mothers.

newmom01's picture

he gets off in the mornings, but not before i have to leave...I have to leave at a certain time to get to work.

Then he will throw in the occasional " Why the heck did we get married if I cant depend on you or your help sometime"

then I feel bad or selfish.....but the truth is those are your kids that you agreed to watch for your ex-wife! Why should everybody have to pitch in to watch them. If YOU cant do it ...then dont volunteer to keep them, just stick to your every other weekend.

And for those who have not read my older blogs, my dh drive 18 wheelers and works weird hours so I understand....but when were dating the kidas never came over that much...after we got married is when all of this stuff started happening...and when asked why ..his answer was because I am re-married and I have a family now, I have help!! really?

Disneyfan's picture

Wow, so his reason for getting married was to have a live in sitter???

He can have the kids spend the night with his mother. That way no one has to deal with A.M. drop off.

OR

Stop agreeing to keep the kids during BM's time.

Bex_S's picture

Just refuse. It can cause issues at first, but you are not his opare. You are his wife. They are his kids and his responsibility; he should be dropping them off, especially since he's free to do it. Your role as a step is that of support; don't let them use you.

tog redux's picture

What the hell? DH is the problem here, not BM. He can take the week off if his kids are going to be there. It’s not your job to deal with them. 

And if he makes that “why did I get married” comment again, tell him you’ve been asking yourself the same question. 

What a jerk.