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A stress free weekend??

New Mama's picture

DH asked if I want him to keep SS7 around for the weekend or send him to grandparent's house. Initially, I said we should keep him around so we can work on bonding and being positive. After arguing last night and this morning, I told DH that I need a break from the drama and that SS7 should go to the grandparent's house. DH agreed.

I told DH that I'd like to work on our relationship because I feel so disconnected with him right now. Being close to him again would make me feel less like it's boys vs me in our home. DH said, what's the point when we're just going to start fighting again as soon as SS7 gets home.

So, tonight I work late and I'll do our grocery shopping after work. By the time I get home SS7 will already be in bed. Unfortunately BD1 will be in bed too and I hate missing her. DH will be in his office and won't come down. So I'll get to come home to a quiet peaceful house and I can't wait!

Saturday (tomorrow), I'm taking BD1 to the library to play and listen to stories. DH and SS7 can sit at home in their misery until DH decides to get up and take SS7 to grandma's house. DH also has school tomorrow. So, esentially it'll be a stress free day as long as I can avoid SS7 until I'm out of the house.

Sunday I can sleep in stress free because SS7 won't be there to torment BD1 and pit DH against me. This will be the best part of the weekend. I should be able to supress my panick attacks about SS7's return until 6pm or so.

Monday, I'll be at work and SS7 will go to school. I won't have to see him until 5pm but I'll worry about it all day because he's generally bad after being with his grandparents for any amount of time. He'll have a bad day at school and DH will let it go unpunished, again. DH and I will probably be in a fight by 6pm. Kids in bed by 7pm. DH will hide upstairs by 7:15pm. Tears will ensue by 7:30pm and I'll go to bed alone by 10pm.

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New Mama's picture

SS7 is a full time tenant - lucky me. His BM abandoned him around the age of 3 and I came into the picture when he was 4. Generally the grandparents take him every weekend or every other weekend. That should be a blessing, but it's not. The grandparents hate me and ignore BD1 to get at me. So they put all kinds of crap in his head as well as spoil the ever loving crap out of him and he comes back worse than he was.

Two weekends without the grandparents in the picture is two steps forward with SS7's behavior. One weekend at the grandparent's house is ten steps back.

DH has never treated BD1 differently until recently. I'm 5 months pregnant so it's possible I'm being sensitive, but DH recently yells at BD1 for dumb stuff infront of SS7. It's generally after SS7 has tattled too. I told him to stop yelling at her or I'd throw their asses out (the house is mine). He agreed to stop.

New Mama's picture

Thanks!

DH's family is (and I'm putting this nicely) the most disgusting group of people you'd ever have the displeasure of meeting. When we brought SS7 out here DH's mother told him we had coyotes that killed bunnies and kittens. He was scared to sleep at our house for months. Dh's father asked to take him out of town for 5 days and kept him for 30 against DH's wishes. The list could go on and on and on.

I was abandoned by my father many many years ago. I sympathize with SS7. I'm the only one that doesn't let him use it as an excuse to get away with murder.